Dreams of Sunrise
by foreverthedreamer
Summary: After a tragic accident has left Bella without the man of her life, she has to decide if it's time to move on and give love a second chance. All characters are human.
1. Chapter 1 My Bonus

**Ch.1 ****My Bonus**

My day had started like any other day: getting up at 5:30 after a restless night of sleep, going for a run while listening to my iPOD, hoping in the shower, having breakfast and getting ready to go to work.

By 7 am I was at the one place I could count on, in front of the microscope counting cells for the latest experiment Sam had conjured up. Don't get me wrong, I love my work. For me it was perfect job. I could come in and work and work without anyone else bothering me. I've spent hours in this place, even weekends. I don't even remember when was the last time that coming to the lab wasn't part of my normal routine. It was my safe place, the only safe place I had left.

"Ok, Bella, we need to talk." I heard Sam say as I turned around from the microscope.

"Yes?" I replied.

"I've decided something for you." He simply stated. "You ARE taking a break from this and you ARE going on a vacation!"

Sam has been telling me the same lines every day for the past 4 months and I just answered the same way every time: "I don't have anything else to do and you know it. Besides, you know that your lab can't function without me. I'm the best assistant you've had and you can't live without me."

Sam gave me a hard look. It made me think, just for a second, that this time he was serious. He grabbed a stool and brought it next to mine, exhaled and looked at me with tired eyes.

"Bella, I'm serious this time. You have been spending every imaginable moment in this lab. You even come here on the weekends, which although gets work done, is not healthy for you. You have been working so hard that all our experiments are done and now it's just a matter of getting the data analyzed and submitting the results to the journal."

"I can help with that." I replied while looking down at my hands. I new that this conversation was turning into something I didn't want and I felt powerless.

"Bella, Bella, Bella" Sam said while softly placing his hand on mine. "You need a break from this, it's been 2 years since you started working for me and in all that time you have not taken even a sick day, not to mention even a holiday off. You are exhausted and I only want the best for you. You are taking a 2 week vacation and that is final!"

I didn't know what to say. I felt my strength dwindle for a second and my head had started spinning. I was cornered. I had been following the motions for so long that to know that I would be left with nothing to do for 2 weeks was making me dizzy.

Sam immediately grabbed my arm and asked: "Are you ok?"

I nodded quickly:" Yeah, yeah, just a little lightheaded that's all."

Sam said: "Bella, there's nothing to worry about, everything in the lab will be the same when you come back from your trip."

"My… trip?!?" I replied.

"Yeah, I figured that if I didn't force you to leave the state, somehow you will still show up here every morning. Take it as a long overdue bonus. I got you a fully paid trip to my beach house in California. I made arrangements and got you everything you will need. I want you to know how much I appreciate everything you've done for me and for the lab and I thought those 2 weeks in the sun could be a good start." Sam simply replied.

I looked up and saw the tenderness in his look, he was really worried and I didn't know what to say. My head was not working properly, I couldn't even fathom what all of this meant. 2 weeks, alone with nothing to do but think. My worst nightmare!

I don't even know how my mouth opened to say "Ok."

"Ok, really? That's great!" Sam replied. "Let me get you your itinerary and the rest of the things." Sam got up and darted to his office.

I was left alone for a minute. I had no one to turn to now. Had it really been 2 years since then, since I left? How could I possibly deal with 2 weeks of silence, the thing I dreaded the most. Maybe it was time I dealt with the ghosts from the past. God only knew how exhausted I was. And the beach didn't sound that bad, I could catch up with my reading and even call my parents.

How long had it been since I spoke to Charlie? I think it had been Christmas. He had argued with me because I refused to go visit him in Forks or Renee in Jacksonville. I had come up with the excuse of an overdue experiment, but Charlie knew better.

"_Bells, you don't have to lie to me" Charlie had said over the phone. I could hear the sadness in his voice._

"_No, dad, I'm not lying, there IS an experiment that I have to finish and I can't leave…….. I'm sorry." It was all I could say._

"_Bells, it's ok if you don't want to come here because it reminds you of him, or talk to your mom about him, but don't use lab work as an excuse." Charlie replied._

_How had he known that it was painful still? That I couldn't even say his name or think of him or see anything that reminded me of him? _

"_Dad, I…… just can't." I said in the verge of tears._

"_It's ok Bells, you'll get over Jacob one of these days."_

_Jacob, he had said it. A flush on anger, rage, sorrow, misery and despair flushed through me all at once._

"_Don't say HIS name!" I yelled at the receiver._

"_I'm sorry Bells, it just slipped. We won't talk about him anymore. I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas that's all. I didn't mean to upset you." Charlie replied._

"_It's ok Dad, it's ok" Although it wasn't. "Merry Christmas to you too" and I just hung up._

"Bella, here's all the info. Your plane leaves tomorrow afternoon, so I guess you should take the rest of the day to go over all the papers and start packing." Sam said.

I snapped out of and replied: "But so soon? I was in the middle of counting cells and I can't just leave the lab without getting things organized!"

"Bella, there's nothing to get organized around here since you are a neat freak and those cells are fine if you leave them, they won't miss you, much. I'm not an art display in here you know! I know how to run MY lab. Go and get all your things ready. I'll be dropping you off in the airport myself just to make sure you get on that plane. So see you tomorrow" Sam finished saying while getting up, putting a pair of latex gloves on and moving over to the microscope.

I was speechless again, I had to go home and pack, I knew this. But the uncertainty of leaving my safe place was unnerving. I know I had lost the battle and that there was nothing I could say or do to make Sam change his mind. I got up from the stool, grabbed the envelope he had placed in the lab bench and left the room without saying goodbye.


	2. Chapter 2 Airplane Ride

**CH.2 Airplane Ride**

"So don't forget, call me when your plane arrives" said Sam while grinning at me.

"OK, Sam, you don't have to smile so much you know." I replied.

"Relax, Bella, I'm just happy to know that I finally got you out of my lab, I need a break from you, you know." He said winking at me and hitting me lightly with his elbow. "Bella, don't forget, Dr. Cullen's daughter will be picking you up from the airport, he's a great colleague of mine and a great friend. Alice, that's her name, agreed to take you to the beach house and show you around while you're in California. She'll have a sign with your name so she'll be easy to pick out of the crowd."

"You know Sam, you're treating me like I was 10 years old. I'm a grown woman for heaven's sake!" I snapped back at Sam.

"I'm ignoring what you just said because I know those are nerves; you wouldn't speak to your BOSS that way, would you?" Sam replied giving me a sad puppy face.

I couldn't help but laugh at him, so I said: "It's ok, Sam I know that you think I'm the daughter you never had, so I'll let it go. I have to get going if you don't want me loosing my plane."

"Then go, go, go!" Was all Sam said while pushing me into the security checkpoint line. "Have a wonderful trip Bella, and don't even think about calling the lab even once! Well, maybe just to let me know you got there safely."

"Thanks Sam, see you when I get back." Was all that I could say. I turned into the line and made my way through the checkpoint and boarding without even realizing it. I took my seat in First class, which I couldn't believe Sam had gotten me and made myself comfortable in my seat.

The plane took off and suddenly I felt extremely tired. My eyelids weighed a ton and I could not help but give in to the waves of sleep that where enveloping me….

"_This has been a great day, Bella" Jacob whispered softly in my ear. "I can't believe it's been 5 years already. Happy anniversary."_

_We were holding each other in a warm embrace looking at the sunset in the beach._

"_I know" I replied. "It feels it was almost yesterday I moved to Forks with Charlie."_

"_Remember the first time we met?" Jacob asked._

_I had turned to look at his wonderful deep brown eyes and said: "Yeah, it had been Charlie's idea to go visit Billy and go fishing. And then you came out of your house and I saw you and all the dread I had felt for having to spend a day with fish and worms just suddenly disappeared."_

"_Hey! Was I only good for keeping you distracted from the worms?" Jacob said while teasing my hair._

_I couldn't help but laugh: "No, I mean, you know what I mean, when I saw you it was like my feet where no longer in the ground, like I was floating in the air."_

"_I still feel like that Bellz" Jacob said._

"_Just one more reason for me to love you even more." I replied. _

_We got closer to each other and I rested my head in his chest. I could hear his deep breathing and his heartbeat keeping a constant rhythm. I was mesmerized by how simple things like listening to him breathing made me feel._

"_Bellz?" Asked Jacob_

"_Yes?" I said_

"_Can you believe it? In a month you'll be Mrs. Jacob Black" He said softly._

_I turned my head to face him and loose myself in his deep gaze. "I am the happiest woman alive, and I love you more and more with each day Jacob. I can't wait to be called Mrs. Black." _

_He leaned down and kissed me softly……._

_I'm in my house and the phone rings. I run to go answer it because I woke up with a horrible feeling in my stomach this morning. Some premonition that something was not right, that something was going to happen._

"_Hello?" Was all I could muster up to say._

"_Bells, it's dad, something's happened. I'm sorry but Jacob……"_

_The receiver fell from my hand I started screaming from the top of my lungs. "NOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!"_

"Miss, miss, are you alright?" Asked the stewardess.

"Ahhh?" I said while my eyes slowly opened.

"You were talking in your sleep and I just wanted to make sure everything was fine." She said.

"Yes, thank you. Are we almost there?" I said while rubbing my eyes.

"Yes, we will be landing in 15 minutes."

"Thank you" I said.

The stewardess gave me a puzzling look that only lasted a few seconds. While she moved away I straightened myself up. I couldn't believe it had happened again. The same dream I had every night, the same dream that had played over and over for the past 2 years. I didn't want to think about it so I just grabbed the magazine that was in front of me and kept flipping through it until my nerves calmed down and I was back to a semi-normal state.

I didn't have a lot of time left so I grabbed my purse and made sure that the envelope with all the info Sam had given me was in there. I opened it again to check. It had a set of keys, a map of the area I was going to be in with a red circle marked around his house. It also had my return flight and a little card that said: To my best employee ever, hope you like the bonus. Sam. I could only half-smile at this. Sam had become the only person I interacted with. He was an excellent boss, and I could even say a great friend. He had gone through so much to do this for me; I definitely needed to get him something to show how much I appreciated him.

I had resigned myself to at least try and enjoy the trip. God only knows how long it had been since I had gotten a tan. So at the least these were going to be 2 weeks of reading, sunbathing and some shopping (although the shopping will be for more books and music of course!).

I got out of the plane and since I didn't have anything but my carry-on and my purse I made it out of the area quickly. I took a quick break to call Sam and tell him I had landed safely. He was glad to hear it and reminded me to not call him for the next 2 weeks. I hung up and went to the baggage claim area.

There was a young lady standing with my name in a piece of paper. She looked like one of those little fairies that escaped an enchanted children's book. She had her hair fashioned with little spkies in the ends, was wearing a black mini-skirt, some nice leather boots and a spaghetti- strap top, that although simple, looked extremely expensive.

I made my way over to her and said "Hi, I'm Bella Swan. I guess you're Alice."

She looked at me, her eyes just glowing and immediately she threw her arms around me and gave me a big hug.

"I'm so glad to meet you Bella. I was so excited when I heard that you were coming. Sam has talked about you so much! I feel like I know you already. We are going to be such great friends, I know it!" Alice said while taking my carry on and moving toward the exit.

I was in shock at all this emotional reaction from Alice so I just simply gave her a little smile and said "OK".


	3. Chapter 3 Beach House

**Ch.3 Beach House**

The ride to the beach house was full of sun, palm trees and wind. Alice had decided to show me around the neighborhood before dropping me off so I could get familiarized with the area.

"So here's the Coffee Shop I told you about, and here's that other bookstore I mentioned" Alice said while pointing to her right. "And here's one of my favorite boutiques in the entire area, their variety is simply amazing."

"Well, thank you for showing me all of this. It's going to take some time to get familiarized with the area." Was my reply.

"Bella, don't worry, I will be your official travel guide for the entire trip. Just leave everything up to me and I'll make sure that you don't get lost and that your shopping needs are met!" Alice laughed. She turned her red convertible to the left in the next intersection.

"We're almost there!" Alice said.

I was mesmerized by the look of these houses. They were beautiful! All looked like little cottages with beautiful landscaped yards. The smell of the sea wrapped everything.

"We're here!" Alice said while turning her car into a garage next to one of the houses. The house was painted white with a simple blue trim. It had a small front lawn that was neatly trimmed and a row of miniature trees that flanked each side of the cobblestones that made the pathway to the main entrance.

We made it out of the car and into the house. The furniture in the living area was simple but modern. Everything was in light shades of creams and whites with hints of red every now and again. There was a nice fireplace in the middle of the living room and an ornate rug with red and cream designs on it placed in front. Embroidered cushions flanked the sofa that was positioned in front of the fireplace. Everything looked as if it had been taken from a designer magazine and placed perfectly in the house. Passing the small but beautiful dark wood dining set to the end of the room where floor to ceiling glass windows with a breathtaking view of the beach. I couldn't believe how beautiful it all looked.

Alice seemed to notice my reaction and said: "My mother Esme helped decorate the house. Since Sam only comes during the summer and barely has time for anything, my mom took it upon herself to get the house looking like it should. Here, let me show you the rest of it."

We moved to the rest of the house where she showed me the fully stacked kitchen, the two bedrooms and library, as well as both bathrooms. I decided to move my things over to the guest bedroom when Alice insisted I take the master bedroom as per Sam's orders. After giving in to the demands of Alice, we made it back to the living room.

"And there's the beach" Alice said pointing to the double doors by the glass windows. Beside the double doors was a small patio area with some steps to its side. "You just need to open the doors and walk down those steps and you're in the sand."

"This is all so beautiful!" Was all I could say.

"I hope you enjoy it" Alice replied.

"Thank you for showing me around the house and the neighborhood Alice, I really appreciate it." I told Alice.

"I'll let you get settled. I'll see you later tonight." Alice said while making her way to the front door.

"Tonight?" I said

"I almost forgot! My mom would kill me if I forgot to tell you!" Alice said while turning around and looking at me. "Since you just got here, my mom thought it would be only appropriate to welcome you by having dinner with our family. She wants to make sure you feel at home while you're here. So I'll be coming around 6:30 to pick you up and take you to our house."

"Ummmm" I said.

In reality I was panicking. I hadn't interacted with a group of people in so long that I really didn't how this evening was going to work out. But worse than that was that I didn't know how to decline. I couldn't just say no, because that would not only be rude, especially since they're such good friends with Sam , but they had gone to all this trouble to make me feel welcome. Something inside kept telling me that for once, I had to act against my instincts and just accept the invitation, and so I did.

"OK, I'll be ready." I replied.

"Great! See you at 6:30 sharp!" Alice said while waving at me and walking out the door.

I just sat down in the sofa for a second and put my head between my hands. How had all of this happened? Yesterday had been predictable. And now it seemed as if everything in my life was out of balance and I had lost control of it all. I rested my head in the backrest of the sofa and closed my eyes. I was exhausted, but I knew that if I went to sleep the nightmares would begin and that was something I simply didn't have the strength nor will to handle right now. I slowly opened my eyes and took in the view once more. The beach seemed so calm and the rhythm of its waves so inviting. I decided that there was no better time to get acquainted with my surrounding landscape that right now.

I made it to the master bedroom and opened my carry-on bag. I grabbed a pair of shorts and a tank top and quickly changed. Grabbed one of the novels I had brought with me, a towel from the linen closet in the hallway and walked over to the double doors.

Once I opened the doors the sound of the waves crashing in the shore filled me with an unexplained serenity that I welcomed with open arms.

It was then that I realized that this trip might just be a good thing for me. I walked down the steps and made it to the sand. It felt so warm and soft under my feet. I walked a little ways down and placed the towel and the book down. I took a seat for a couple of seconds and then just laid down and let the rays of the sun bathe me for what seemed to be an eternity but in reality was no more that 30 minutes. During this time I just let the sounds of the waves and birds fill my head and thought of nothing. I felt refreshed after this, so I decided to take a short walk down the beach and take in the sights.

I started walking and just letting myself be wrapped by the smell and the sounds of the sea. Everything looked so peaceful. It felt as if the beach was in my possession and nothing could disrupt me of the calm feeling I had. It had been so long since I had felt some kind of peace that I kept walking down the shore. I had been walking for at least half a mile collecting seashells to make something with them in one of my free days, maybe a picture frame, when I noticed some guys surfing. The freedom of their movements was amazing. It was as if they had become one with the waves.

I sat down in the sand, placed my shells beside me and watched them for a long time, before I realized that I needed to make it back to the house. As I made it up from my spot I noticed that the group of surfers was making their way out of the water as well. They all seemed so happy, so care free. I took a quick glance their way and noticed one of them, he had beautiful reddish hair and as he smiled it seemed that he was glowing. His beautiful features enraptured me for a second. I couldn't stop gazing at him; he looked like a Greek sculpture that had come alive. They were all laughing and talking and didn't notice me. I finally realized that I was staring and turned away quickly forgetting my shells. I couldn't help but take a final glance over at them when I realized that the one I had been staring at was looking back at me and gave me a quick smile while putting his fingers through his damp hair.

His smile was mesmerizing. I immediately panicked and just turned away and started walking back to the house. What was I thinking? I didn't need any of this. I was here to relax and get away from the routine, not to complicate my life by looking at cute boys. Although, what was wrong with looking? It wasn't as if I was doing anything wrong. And it had been so long since I had noticed anyone…. But it made me feel as if I had done something terribly wrong, as if I had betrayed Jacob by noticing someone else. My stride became faster.

Just thinking about Jacob, although for just a second, gave me this awful feeling of despair. My eyes started to water and I knew I had to make it back soon before I completely lost it. I started running back to the house, saw the towel and the book and went to get them but my knees buckled and I just collapsed on the towel. I started to cry and cry. I couldn't hold my tears as they strolled down my cheeks. It was impossible to stop. So I gave in and cried for what seemed hours.

"I'm sorry…." I said between my teeth. "I'm so sorry" Images of Jacob smiling flooded my mind. "I miss you so much" I said. I cried until the pain in my chest had lessened and there were no more tears in my eyes. The worst of it had passed. I had gotten accustomed to live with the constant throb in my chest, so I slowly got up and grabbed my things. I made it up the steps and into the house, where I noticed the clock in the kitchen said it was almost 6 pm. I had to hurry before Alice got here; she struck me as the type of person to always be on time.

I threw my things in the bed and grabbed some clothes and my toiletries and made it into the master bathroom. The bathroom was beautiful; it looked like I had stepped into a spa. The shower was amazing, it had double massaging heads. I didn't hesitate to hop into the shower. As the warm water fell on me the tension in my shoulders eased and the pain in my chest lessened some more. When I finally got out I was feeling as good as my "normal" felt. I quickly worked on detangling my hair.

For some weird reason I had grabbed my pajama bottoms instead of my jeans, so I went back to my carry-on and looked for an outfit. I changed my mind on the jeans and settled for a nice knee-length khaki skirt. I put my sandals on and grabbed a dark blue blouse from the bag; it was the only thing that didn't have wrinkles in it. I went back into the bathroom and took a look at myself. For some reason the blue made complexion look very good, which would help hide the fact that I had been crying for hours. "Good" I said to myself. "You almost look normal." I decided to wear my little blue earrings and finished getting ready; it was almost time for Alice to show up.

As I made it to the kitchen to get a quick glass of water, I heard the doorbell. I looked at the clock and saw that it was 6:29. I made it to the front door and there she was, on time as I suspected.

"Hi! Are you ready?" Alice asked.

"As ready as I'll ever be, let me grab the keys." I replied as I went for the keys and made my way out the door.


	4. Chapter 4 Dinner Guest

**_Author's Note: _**

**_Hi!!!!! Thank you so moch for reading my story. I'm so excited about it! I would greatly appreciate it if you can leave a review to let me know how I'm doing and if there's anything I should change. Hope you enjoy the chapter!_**

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Ch. 4 Dinner Guest

The ride over to the Cullen's was a not as long as I had expected it. During that time Alice filled me in with some details of her family's structure.

"Sam and my dad met during their post-grad years at UCLA. Since then, they've been great friends. So when he asked my dad look after you during your trip he didn't hesitate. We are all so happy that you're here visiting." Alice said while smiling. "I have 2 brothers, Emmett and Edward, whom you'll meet tonight. Emmett's a little bit crazy about sports but he's a sweetheart. And Edward, well, he's a little hard to describe, but you'll see for yourself. And then there's Rosalie, Emmett's girlfriend. Oh, and you'll also meet the love of my life Jasper, he's the best!" Alice said while blushing a little.

"Wow, Ummmm, that's a lot of people." I said.

"Well, in my family, once you're welcomed in, you're considered part of it and treated as such. It's not that many people Bella." Said Alice. "Don't worry and relax a bit, is not like we bite much!"

"Ha-ha" I said. "Very funny."

I had been trying to stay calm, collected and sociable since we left the house. Being in the car with Alice was easy. She had this way about her which made me feel welcome and not judged. She knew exactly when to give me space and when to talk. But knowing that I would have to interact with all these people was not helping me.

For the past couple of years I had become reclusive and a bit of a hermit, with only having Sam and the sporadic cashier to interact with. Knowing that my normal routine was changing and that I would have to in some degree be cordial and talkative with 7 others all at once was giving me an upset stomach.

I had to get through this night. I couldn't let the feelings from earlier in the day take hold of me again. I just couldn't let Sam down. I took the granted minutes of silence Alice provided to collect my thoughts and calm myself down. I could do this. I had been sociable and pleasant once and I certainly could do it again.

Alice was pulling up to the entrance of what seemed to be a mansion. The place looked like it was secluded from everything else, but in reality was easily accessible. It had perfectly kept grounds surrounding the entrance. As we kept driving I could see dim details of the architectural masterpiece that this house was. The house itself was enormous; it looked like a Tuscan Villa had been transported magically to California. The fountain that anchored the entrance was made of stone and the water seemed to shine in the light of twilight that was around us. The balcony that surrounded the upstairs portion of the house was full of vines and plants that cascaded downwards.

I was so mesmerized by the beauty of the place that I didn't even notice when Alice parked her car.

"We're here!" Alice said. "Come, let's not make them wait any longer."

"Ok" I said. I took a deep breath and opened the red door of Alice's convertible and made my way out. I followed Alice as she made her way to the front door.

Alice grabbed my hand for just a second. "Bella, there's nothing to be scared about." She said reassuringly. "You look like a deer caught in the headlights."

"Oh, sorry, it's just that this place is beautiful!" I replied, although the reality was that I was so nervous and feeling extremely overwhelmed.

"Come in, I'm pretty sure my mom would love to hear you complements her house." Alice moved to the front Spanish-style wood and iron door. As we stepped inside I could not believe what my eyes were seeing. Everything in this house seemed to step out of a former century. There were oil paintings and sculptures everywhere. And in the middle of the most elegant living room set my eyes had ever seen there was a masterful black grand piano. It was just beautiful.

"We're here!" Alice yelled. I followed her out of the living room as we moved further inside and walked over to a small hallway in the right side. "We almost never use the living room" Alice whispered "It's just there to show off my mom's art collection and to house Edward's piano."

The hallway took us into a smaller living room with an entire different feel. This one was still elegant, but in a much simple way and had a very homey feel to it. It felt lived-in. To the left was a couch with a plasma TV in the wall across, some football game was playing. To the right were some chairs and another loveseat anchored by a beautiful dark wood coffee table, great for a conversation area. Everything looked inviting and welcoming in this room.

"Everyone, let me introduce you to Bella" Alice said from behind me while placing her hands on my shoulder and escorting me inside the room.

I had been so engrossed with the surroundings that I hadn't noticed there were people sitting in the sofa and also stepping out from the left side of the room.

"Bella" Alice said. "These are my parents" Alice's parents had stepped forward and had made it all the way in front of me.

"Pleasure to meet you Dr. and Mrs. Cullen" I replied while softly shaking their hands.

"Please call me Esme, and this is Carlisle" Alice's mother replied. "We're not too keen with formalities, and Mrs. Cullen makes me feel older than I am."

I gave her a quick smile and nodded. They both looked beautiful, her appearance made her look regal, although she also looked very loving and caring and he was very handsome as well, I could see how Esme had fallen in love with him.

"Let me introduce you to the rest of our family." Said Esme while grabbing my hand and escorting me towards the sofa. "This is my eldest son Emmett and his lovely girlfriend Rosalie."

A very tall and muscular guy and dark black hair stepped forward and vigorously shook my hand.

"Nice to meet you Bella" Emmett said.

"Nice to meet you too" I replied. For some reason he seemed familiar, as if I had seen him before somewhere.

"Nice to meet you" said Rosalie as she stepped forward. She had the most beautiful face I had ever seen. She was tall and statuesque. Her blemish-free complexion was completely surrounded by soft golden curls that served as a frame to her face, she moved with such grace that it took me by surprise.

"Nice to meet you too" was all I could say. I turned around and saw that everyone I had met already was looking at me and smiling. Which quickly made me self conscious and I could feel my cheeks turning red.

"It's so nice of you to have joined us for dinner" said Esme. "I know you must be exhausted after the trip from NY, but we couldn't just let you be alone in that big house on your first day here."

"Thank you for the invitation Mrs. Cullen, I mean Esme" I said. I could feel that I was blushing and that I couldn't keep eye contact with her.

"There's nothing to apologize for." Esme said while moving towards me and placing her arm around my shoulders. "Now, I'm pretty sure you're starving, so let's go have some dinner."

"Mom, where are Jasper and Edward?" Alice said.

"Oh, I almost forgot, Jasper called and said he would be late, to start without him. He had some kind of errand to run. And Edward, well you know how he is, he just said he will be back later." Esme replied.

We all made it to the dining room towards the left of the room. From this point of view I could see that the dining room was beautiful. The fabrics that covered the chairs were rich and elegant, although not extravagant. And I could also see the kitchen with granite countertops and mahogany cabinets. This entire house was beautiful!

"Your house is simply beautiful Esme." I said.

"Well thank you very much." Esme replied. "I love architecture and remodeling; it's actually an obsession of mine. I took it upon myself to build this house from the ground up and everything inside as well. But enough about talk about my obsessive compulsive disorder with houses, let's go eat."

We made it to the dining table and each of us took their prospective place. The food was delicious. I was surprised to hear that Carlisle and Rosalie had been the masterminds behind the feast.

Conversation never ended around the dinner table. It was so nice seeing everyone talk and making little jokes about each other. As time passed by my nerves had almost disappeared and I felt at ease. For some reason I didn't mind just sitting and being an expectator of it all. They went beyond their way to include me in every aspect of their conversation. Everyone was so nice and funny too. By the end we were all laughing, which for me was an unexpected event since I hadn't laughed in years.

We got up from the table and although I insisted on helping with the dishes I was vehemently refused and escorted to the family room by Esme.

"Ok Bella, you're the guest and it's impossible to let you touch dishes around here." Esme said. 'That's usually Emmett's job and he just loves it."

"That's right! I just _looove_ doing dishes" Emmett said as he put an apron on and started working on the dishes.

We sat down on the chairs by the coffee table and kept with the conversation.

"So Bella, Sam told us you've been his right hand for 2 years." Carlisle said.

"Yes, Sam's a friend of an acquaintance of mine and when I moved to NY I contacted him to see if he could help me find a job. I had finished my undergrad in Biology and he knew that I had been working in a research lab back home so he didn't hesitate to take me under his wing." I said. I didn't want to go into further details on how exactly I knew Sam and why I had moved to NY so I politely smiled and left it at that.

"Well, Sam is always singing your praises" Emmett said. He had finished loading the dishes in the dishwasher and was making his way towards Rosalie. "Every time he calls he's talking about Bella and how great she is and this and that."

"Emmett, be nice" Rosalie said.

"I am being nice, I'm always nice. I'm the nicest thing that has ever walked this earth." Emmett replied.

"Humbleness is a virtue that unfortunately Emmett doesn't possess." Carlisle replied with a smile on his face.

We were all smiling and about to restart the conversation when we heard some steps through the hallway.

"That must be Jasper or Edward." Esme said.

I was facing opposite of the hallway so I had to turn around to look. I could hear multiple steps coming our way. The first one to walk through the hallway entrance was a guy with longish blonde hair in a typical surfer haircut. He was tall and a bit muscular as well, although not as tall or muscular as Emmett. He looked at me and gave me a quick smile.

"Hi, sorry I'm late. I'm Jasper, and you must be Bella." He said.

I got up from my seat and extended my hand over and shook his. He had something about him that made me feel calm. For some reason he looked vaguely familiar as well, but I just couldn't pinpoint it.

"I thought I heard someone else" said Carlisle. "Was Edward with you?"

"Oh, yeah. I had to go get something and we met up. He just went upstairs to his room for a sec. He should making his way over here now." Jasper replied.

Alice made it over to Jasper and gave him a very loving but short kiss. They looked at each other for just a couple of seconds but in that short period I could see how madly in love they were with each other. I couldn't help but feel a little bit of pain coming back to my chest. So I averted my gaze to them and moved my eyes over to Esme.

"Well, it's nice of you too to finally decide to join us." Esme said. "I'm definitely having a little talk with you two after our guest goes home."

"I'm sorry Esme, but I really needed to take care of something and it couldn't wait. By the way, are there any leftovers?" Jasper said while making his way over to Esme and holding her hands in his and giving her a sad puppy face look.

"In the kitchen" Esme said. She was trying to look mad, but couldn't help smile and give in to his charm.

"So, is anyone up to for a game?" Emmett said.

"Is no fun playing games with you Emmett, you always turn them into a competition." A male voice behind me said.

This voice sounded reassuring but soft. I turned around to see where it had come from. He was leaning on the edge of the hallway, with his arms crossed over his chest. He was wearing dark washed jeans and a navy blue v-neck sweater. When I made it up to look at his face I couldn't believe it! It was the same guy I had seen at the beach. I could see his features more clearly. He had deep set golden eyes and high cheekbones, a strong jaw line, straight nose, and very full lips. His hair, although messy, still showed the reddish tint it had in the beach.

I immediately stopped staring when I felt my face blush turned around to try and look at something else, but I could only focus on one of those coffee table books on the table.

"So this must be out guest of honor" he said while he moved over to where I was standing. "It's a pleasure to meet you Bella. I'm Edward."

I looked up for a second and saw that he had extended his hand towards me.

"Nice to meet you too" I whispered.

I extended my hand over as a cordiality. He grabbed my hand and brought it over to his lips and gave it a soft kiss. I could feel an electric current running down my spine as this happened. He let go of my hand and gave me a smile with the corner of his mouth. I was in a daze. My head was swimming and I couldn't control my balance. I looked down, knowing that my face had gone into a deep shade of red and immediately moved my arm to the edge of the chair and grabbed for balance.

"And where were you?" Alice said. "You know is very rude to be so late. No one would think that you were brought up differently."

"Oh Alice" Esme replied. "Leave Edward alone. I'm pretty sure he had a good reason to be disrespectful to our guest."

"I'm sorry for being late." Said Edward. "I had something to take care of and it took longer than expected."

"Whatever" said Emmett. "Let's just forget it and play a game or something."

As all of this was happening my head kept spinning. All different emotions were taking hold on me. The evening had been so pleasant, and I had made so much progress in being cordial and sociable. But this, now this was completely unexpected and threw me off guard.

Someone up there was playing a very cruel joke on me. I couldn't believe that out of all the people I could run across, the one guy I had been staring at earlier today was here. I remembered now that it had been Emmett and Jasper who I had seen with Edward on the beach. And now everything came back at once. I knew that I was loosing it, and needed to come up with some excuse to leave the room and leave it now.

"Where's the restroom?" I said as my hands pressed hard against my temples.

"Bella, is everything ok?" said Alice. "You don't look so good." She moved immediately to my side.

"I'm a bit tired to be truthful." I lied. I wasn't tired, I was mortified.

"Well, I think we have been very inconsiderate." Esme replied. "Here we go on and on and Bella must be spent after such a long day of travel."

"I think maybe you should take Bella home" Carlisle told Alice.

"Good idea" she replied. "Bella, want me to take you home?"

"Yes please" I replied.

"Well Bella, we hope tomorrow you're feeling better. We'll see you again soon." Esme said.

"I'll go get the car" replied Jasper.

Everyone said their goodbyes while I just nodded. Jasper had gone outside to get the car and Alice and I were making our way towards the entrance when Edward stepped in front of us.

"May I join you guys in taking Bella home?" he asked Alice.

I was dying inside. I didn't want him in the same room as me, even less in the confined space of a car. I just kept looking down and staring at the floor.

"I guess" Alice replied.

We made it outside just as Jasper was pulling up, so I got inside the car. I was hoping that Alice would sit next to me but Edward was sent to the back and Alice sat in the front with Jasper.

I had Goosebumps in my arms. My stomach was playing acrobatics and my head was spinning. I moved to the edge of the seat, closed my eyes, leaned my head in the seat of the car and hoped the drive was a short one.

"You ok?" Edward asked.

"I'm just very tired" was all I could say. I was praying in my head for this torture to be over. It seemed that he sensed I wanted to be left alone so he didn't speak to me the rest of the way, although I could feel that his eyes kept watching me the entire way.

I just needed to make it through the doors and away from him. Just a couple of more minutes I kept saying to myself. I just needed to hold it together for a little more.

The minutes passed by and I could feel the car slowing down and pulling over to the garage. As I was trying to make it out of the car my foot got tangled on the seatbelt and I tripped. Edward grabbed me in his arms.

"Careful, we don't want any injuries" Edward said.

His arms felt strong and warm. He didn't let go until I was safely upright.

"Thanks" I managed to answer.

I turned over to Alice and Jasper and thanked them as fast as I could for driving me home.

"I'll walk her to the door" Edward told Alice.

By then I was beyond panicking. I had reached that place where everything is so messed up that you just feel numb. I just needed to get through the doors and give in to the agony inside.

So I gave in and let Edward walk beside me. He took the keys out of my hand and opened the door. As he handed back the keys his fingers caressed my hand and that electric current went down my spine again. He moved to the side making space for me to walk through the door.

"Sweet dreams Bella" Edward said. "Hope to see you again soon."

I couldn't talk. I was desperate to make it through those doors and my hands were shaking. I walked through the door and closed it behind me. I made it to the sofa before I crumbled in the floor. The pain and anxiety were too much. I was exhausted. Tears started rolling down my eyes and I let the agony overpower me. I cried and cried until my eyes closed and the dream world took hold of me…..


	5. Chapter 5 Of Dreams and Tea

**_Author's Note: __Hi to everyone reading my story. I __truly__ appreciate you taking your time to read. It would be of great help to know what each thinks of it so if you could take a minute to review this chapter I would greatly appreciate it. _**

_Also, It seems I need to make a note stating that I am not Stephanie Meyer although I would love to have her imagination._

_Special thanks to pops38 and thaly for adding me to their story list and leaving a review._

_I will try to update the story once or twice a week_

_Well, without any further delay here's the next chapter. _

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**Ch. 5 Of Dreams and Tea**

_Images of Jacob._

_Jacob working on his car in his dad's garage. Jacob teaching me how to ride the motorcycle I had gotten him for his birthday. Jacob smiling at me. An image of our first kiss, so tender and sweet. Of the first time he whispered in my ear I love you. On an on were images of Jacob and me._

_All of a sudden I'm sitting at the beach looking out to the sea. There's a wonderful sunset in the sky. I look down from this wonderful view and see a man walking out of the water, the water glistening like diamonds on is chiseled chest. I look up and see it is Edward I'm watching. He looks at me, his eyes deep pools of topaz. A little smirk forms in his mouth that just melts me into place. He takes a seat next to me and starts to say something._

"_Bella" I hear Edward say…._

I wake up. I'm a little disoriented and confused. I don't remember what I was dreaming about which surprises me. I always remember my recurring dreams, especially since it' been the same recurring nightmare for the past 2 years, but something has changed, as if last night I dreamt of something else…

I shake the feeling off and take a look around. Somehow I had fell asleep on the floor in the living room. My blouse is soaking wet and my back is killing me, so I get up and make my way to the bathroom. Nothing like a nice refreshing shower to get me up and running. Without much thinking I hop in and let the warm water roll down my spine. The water feels so clean and refreshing. Water has always helped me relax and not think, I just let it go down. After what seemed to be an eternity I decide to get out of the shower.

For some reason I'm not feeling as empty and drained as I did yesterday. That was simply horrible. But I'm not feeling anything, I'm actually feeling rested. Normally I feel exhausted and emotionally drained after waking up from sleeping (if that's what you can call what I've been doing for the past 2 years). I look at myself in the mirror and I'm actually looking half decent. My complexion is not as horrible as it normally is in the mornings and I even have a hint of color in my face.

"It must've been the sun from yesterday at the beach" I tell myself. Upon further examination I notice that the ever-present bags under my eyes have dissipated. "This trip might have been a good idea after all." Although I can feel that I'm in a better state than normal, I'm still cautious going to keep an eye on my emotions. Last night had been dreadful, with everything piling up all at once, but for some reason even remembering this is not giving me a panic attack which means that somehow I've managed to overcome another stumbling block.

"It seems you're getting used to this controlling your emotions thing." I tell my reflection. "If you could just take it minute by minute and manage this then maybe the whole trip will be bearable."

I would love not worrying about anything, to just be free of all the pain and anguish that seems to consume me every day and take hold on me unexpectedly. I've reached my breaking point so many times that I just don't know if I can take it once more. There's nothing left in me, just a broken heart that no one will be able to mend.

I decide to take a run around the neighborhood and try to make it to that Coffee Shop Alice had shown me yesterday on the way over. I make it over to the bedroom and grab my workout clothes. I need to leave this house and do it soon.

I should call Alice; let her know that I'm ok. They all seemed so worried about me yesterday; I need to make sure they believe that it was just tiredness and nothing else. I can't afford people meddling in my business. She had left all her numbers by the phone in the living room. I'll call her once I get back.

I take a quick glance in the room I'm in and the disorganization is unbearable, it's just a mess! I take my clothes out of the carry-on, which are not that many, and put then in hangers in the closet. I take the carry-on and put it in the closet as well.

"Now it looks much, much better around here."

I make it over to the kitchen to grab a glass of water before stepping out. The clock says it's 6:30 am. Once I'm finished with the glass I rinse it quickly. I head over to the living room to grab the keys from the floor next to where I felt asleep, I see my purse and open it to grab some cash and without any further thinking I head out the door.

The sun is on its way out and the breeze from the sea carries that amazing smell that just reinvigorates me. I start running. I had noticed how beautiful the neighborhood was when Alice dropped me off from the airport, but running past all these houses gave me a better view of them. Every one of them seemed pretty similar, cookie cutter shapes of little cottages with unique twists in their front lawn decorations.

I had been running for a while when I made it to the main street. Rows and rows of little shops: the boutique Alice had mentioned, a gift shop, another clothing store, a bookstore- I made a mental note to stop by- and the list went on. I knew the coffee shop was close. I ran along the sidewalk a little ways until I saw the wrought iron tables and chairs outside the coffee shop.

I walked in to the store and made my way to the counter. I placed my order, waited for my chai and then grabbed a nice seat on the corner by the window. It was still early so the traffic flow was at a minimum, which I greatly appreciated. Someone had left today's newspaper in the little end table by my seat so I just started glancing over it while drinking my cup of tea. No coffee for me thanks, I don't really like the taste.

News are always so depressing, with tragedies and accidents all around. I just turned the pages until I got to the arts and leisure section, now that is something more bearable. I was reading an article about New Zealand when I hear a familiar voice.

"Good morning Bella, may I join you?"

I look up and see Edward with a drink in his hand. This took me by surprise. Of all the people that I could run into it had to be him. I almost spilled the chai all over myself. After yesterday's episode I didn't know what to do. I was completely speechless.

"Well, I guess if you want to be left alone I'll be on my way then. It was nice seeing you again" he said as he turned to leave.

"Umm, sorry, sorry. Please take a seat" came out of my mouth. What was I thinking asking him to sit? Was I loosing my mind? Apparently that's what was happening because my mouth was betraying my survival instincts. I wanted him gone, not to be in the same planet as he, especially since he made me feel things I didn't want to feel and I just wanted to be left alone, as I had been for so long. But today of all days, my mouth had other ideas.

He grabbed a chair and moved it over to where I sat, a little too close to my chair if you ask me. Being so close to him was making me uncomfortable; it was an invasion to my personal space. So I moved my chair a little bit, which he caught in the corner of his eye but said nothing. I could see him a little better now. He looked ready for another beach day, with a t-shirt, a pair of board shorts and the quaint-essential flip flops.

Two things are true at this point: every time I see Edward my body goes into instantaneous shut down and my mind games start.

My mouth is beyond my comprehension, it has an agenda of its own. My mind is not working properly and since it controls the rest of my body I am trapped with the modern version of Adonis beside me.

"You look better" he says. "I'm glad."

"Thanks" I say. "I just needed to sleep" I lied.

"I'm sorry that I wasn't there for dinner yesterday" Edward said. "I was caught up with something… But I'm glad I found you here, it gives us some time to chat and get to know each other."

"No need to apologize" was all I could say. I was slowly gaining control of my mouth so I took a quick sip from my cup and looked outside the window to avoid any further talking and have some time to think of an excuse to leave.

I was immersed in coming up with an exit strategy when I heard him ask "So, how do you like the West Coast?"

Again goes my mouth and opens up without thinking when I hear myself say "I used to live in the West Coast". Ok, what's up with me today? I was giving too many details of myself and this is definitely NOT normal. I quickly come up with something to change the subject "But I had never been in California, it's beautiful." I hope that grabbing the cup once more would be signal enough that I wasn't going into further details about what I had told him.

Edward seemed to catch my drift when he replied "Glad to know you like it."

We just sat there. Although neither of us talked the silence wasn't awkward, he just sat beside me and drank his coffee. I need to get out of here before something happens. But I'm pretty much trapped. I keep looking down to my lap trying to come up with something to get me out of this situation.

"Are you a news fan?" he asked.

"What? I'm sorry?" snapping out of it.

"I see you have the newspaper in your lap and just wondered if it was something you always read."

"Oh, this?" I say grabbing the newspaper and placing it on the table. "No, someone left it on the table and I just started reading it to pass time. News are not something I keep track of."

"Oh, so what do you like to read then?" he asked.

I knew he was just being polite, and trying to make conversation with me. But being so close to him was finally starting to affect me and I really needed a minute by myself. I looked behind me and saw the familiar sign for the restroom. The perfect excuse!

"Oh, sorry, I'll be right back. I need to visit the ladies room." Really, was this the best I could do? But it would have to be enough.

I didn't hesitate to get up when I see he had gotten up as well and helped move my chair to the side. I felt like running out of the coffee shop, but controlled my pace and made it to the bathroom instead. I grabbed the edge of the sink for dear life. I looked up to the reflection in the mirror and could see that although I felt my nerves acting up, I looked perfectly normal. I took a couple of deep breaths to calm my nerves down.

"You need to get over this" I told myself. "Remember, take it minute by minute." I splashed some water on my face, which helped me to cool down and resigned myself to go back out. I could do this and I was not going to give in to my panic attacks any more. So I walked out the restroom and back to where Edward was….


	6. Chapter 6 Book and bagel

**A/N:**

_Hi! As promised another chapter for this week. Thanks to all who have subscribed to the story, it makes me feel like I'm doing a decent job at this, my first fanfic. I would love to have some of you review it and let me know if there is anything I need to improve. it's not a very long chapter but it is a necessary one. I will be posting longer chapters soon!_

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**Ch.6 Book and bagel**

Although I felt very awkward sitting back down after my sudden emergency departure, I was able to control my nerves. Once I made the decision in the bathroom of getting through a round of questions from him there was nothing to change my mind. I had an uncanny ability of going through with my decisions once they were made, even though sometimes I wish I wasn't so determined. So after a few seconds of silence Edward shifted his seat over and resumed the previous conversation.

"So, what's your favorite book?" Edward had asked.

"At the moment is Wuthering Heights" I replied. As I answered I was immediately transported to a dreary and hard landscape of overcast clouds and barren moors. I couldn't explain it, but ever since I picked the book up a couple of months ago I had been enraptured by the desperation and fervor in Catherine and Heathcliff's relationship. I could relate to Heathcliff's despair after Catherine's demise. Most of the time I felt as he did, with no reason to live and an ardent desire to move past this world into the next.

"Oh, I have always admired Heathcliff's passion for Catherine. I love the part where he tells her: _I have not broken your heart- you have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine._ For me, what really caught my attention was the fact that they see each other as identical, as being one of the same._"_

The fact that Edward had quoted from the book and had such a strong opinion on it had left me a little speechless and I all could say was "I didn't picture you as being a fan of the classics."

Edward just smiled as he took the last sip from his cup. I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to excuse myself and leave before the conversation got any more awkward.

"Well, I'm sure you have things to do and I don't like to impose." I said as I was getting up from my seat.

"Actually, I was just stopping here on my way to the beach. I can drive you back to Sam's since I'm heading that way if you like." He replied.

I didn't want to be perceived as rude, so I just nodded. I figured that once I got to the house I could say a quick goodbye and part ways.

His car, a silver Volvo, was just down the street. I was taken aback by his gentleman manners of opening the passenger door for me, it wasn't something I had expected. I avoided any type of physical contact and scooted into the seat. The fact that the drive back to the house was not going to take more than 10 minutes gave me an immense satisfaction.

I kept my eyes on the outside surroundings the entire way. Although we were both silent on the trip to the house, it wasn't awkward at all. Once he parked in Sam's garage I bolted out of the car. I could feel Edward behind me as I walked to the front door. As I opened it he extended his arm and held the door open for me to enter.

"If you don't mind I'll get a towel from the closet and head out." He said.

I figured this was a very common practice with the Cullen's. The familiarity the Cullen's shared with Sam implied that his house was almost an extension to theirs. So I just nodded and made my way to the living room. Edward walked past me to the linen closet in the hallway, got his towel and walked back towards the glass doors by the dining area.

"It was really nice having an opportunity to talk to you this morning Bella. I hope we can repeat it sometime." He said.

"Have a nice time at the beach" I replied.

He nodded as he opened the glass doors. In a blink of an eye he was out of my sight. I took a deep breath as I felt a rush of blood drain from my face. I slumped to the couch and tilted my head back while I closed my eyes to collect myself.

"What a morning!" I told myself. At least my nerves were composed and I didn't collapse, which I might say is a great improvement. I was going through the events of this morning in my mind and trying to make sense of it all when I heard the phone ring. I got up and went to answer it.

"Hello?" I hesitantly said.

"_Hey Bella! Good morning is Alice!"_

"Oh hi Alice"

"_So, are you feeling better? We were so worried yesterday evening. And I was going to call earlier but mom said that I should let you rest. But I couldn't wait anymore, so how are you?"_

"I'm feeling much better thanks for asking."

"_Well, I was wondering if it would be ok for me to come by and hang out with you. Maybe we can go lay down at the beach or something."_

I didn't know what to say. I knew that if I declined I would hurt her feelings and somehow Sam would find out, and the prospect of having Sam mad at me was not something I was looking forward to. Besides, Alice was actually quite pleasant, and yesterday had been very nice until the Edward episode. So I figured I would give in and spend some time with Alice today.

"OK, Alice that sounds fine."

"_Great! I'll be there in 15 minutes, I knew you wouldn't mind hanging out so I'm already on my way over."_

"See you soon then" I replied before hanging up.

The Cullen's don't really give up! What a persistent lot! Well, I guessed I better get ready before Alice showed up; she doesn't seem to be overly patient. I walked over to what I labeled as my room for the next 2 weeks and grabbed my bathing suit and coverall. I made it over to the bathroom for a quick change and stole a look at myself in the mirror. I cringed at the sight before me. Even though I had the coverall on and that covered much of my main body frame, I could still see that the areas exposed were just too pale. It seemed that I had been in a personal strike against the Sun for whatever reason. Well, at least now I had the chance to make amends for my past transgressions. I looked in my toiletry bag, grabbed the sunscreen and made my way out of the bathroom. Figuring that Alice would need a towel as well I stopped by the linen closet and grabbed a pair. As I was heading towards the living room I heard a knock on the door.

"Hi Alice" I said as I opened the door.

"Good morning!" Alice replied. She looked full of energy. She had a pink 2-piece on and an adorable pair of over-sized sunglasses resting on top of her spiky hair. "I see that Edward made his way over as well" she said while making her way inside and slightly raising an eyebrow.

"Oh" I said. I had completely forgotten all about him, well not _all_ about him. Just the fact that his car was parked outside. "Yeah, we bumped into each other at the Coffee Shop and he offered a ride back since he was heading to the beach."

"That Edward" Alice said as she moved her head from side to side. "Him as his never ending affair with the beach. I swear, if he could live in it, he would."

"I grabbed a towel for you." I said changing the subject and handing her the towel. "Do you want anything from the kitchen?" I asked.

"No, I actually brought you some breakfast. I didn't know you had eaten." She said apologetically as she held a small paper bag.

"Well, actually I haven't. I just had some tea. So thank you." I replied.

"Great!" Here you go then. It's just a bagel and some cream cheese. I figured the New Yorker would need her bagel fix."

"Thanks" I smiled at her as I grabbed the bag and headed over to the kitchen for a glass of juice. "Want to share? I won't be able to eat it all. I'm not that hungry."

"Sure" Alice replied.

I offered her some juice and we made it over to the dining table. As we ate we talked a little more and got to know each other a bit better. I was still very guarded with my answers, but Alice really didn't seem to mind my evasiveness in certain answers. We finished the bagel and Alice refused to let me clean the dishes. So I stayed in the dining room waiting for her as she took care of them.

I was lost in my thoughts for a couple of minutes when I heard Alice's familiar voice ask: "Ready to head outside?" Her good mood was a little contagious.

So I smiled as I replied "As ready as I'll ever be" and we headed out the glass doors into a beautiful sunny day.


	7. Chapter 7 Game Night

**A/N: Thank you again for reading my story and waiting a whole week for the new chapter. I know this chapter is really long, but I couldn't help myself. I will try from now on to not make them as long as this one but not too short either. I would LOVE to hear what everyone thinks of the story so far, and I promise that something very unexpected is going to happen soon!**

_**Really, please leave comments so I know whether I'm doing a decent job or not. And thanks to all of those who have become a fan of the story!**_

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Ch. 7 Game Night**

Alice was nothing if not a fountain of energy. She swam, ran up and down the entire beach, tried (although miserably) to lay down as I did, read some chapters out of my Wuthering Heights book, collected some seashells for my picture frame project and all of this while filling me in with all the details of her life as well some of her family's. The only time she quieted down was when we went inside for a quick bite to eat. I tried to be mad with her for interrupting my relaxation time, but she had such an intoxicating personality that I was actually glad to have her around.

"Bella, you have to come tonight!" Alice said "I promise you will have so much fun with us!"

"I don't know Alice; I still feel a little bit tired and would rather have a quiet evening by myself." I replied.

This conversation had been going on for almost 15 minutes. Alice, and her ever- persuasive attitude, had been trying to convince me, of all people, to join her family for what they called "Game night". Alice had already gone into details of what this night consisted of. One of the family members, for they all took turns, chose a theme for the evening and planned a series of games –board games, outside games, made-up games- to go with the theme. They went so far as to have food and decorations to match the theme! For me it was too much, I suspected the Cullen's to be a very merry bunch by what I had seen yesterday, but this was beyond anything I could have imagined.

"Ohh, come on Bella, please come! I promise you will enjoy yourself. It's Casino night!" Alice said while trying to hold her excitement to a minimum.

"I don't know. Besides, I 'm no good with cards." I replied. I had been trying non-successfully to get out of the invitation but it was becoming harder by the minute.

"Don't worry about it Bella, everything you need to know we'll show you. Just say you'll come. And if for some reason you _need_ to leave early, one of us will bring you back without questions." She said with pleading eyes.

The look she was giving me made it impossible to refuse the invitation. "Ok" I said. "But if I start feeling very tired I get to come back to the house without questions."

"YES! YES! Of course!" Alice said. She got up from her towel and started grabbing her things. "Come on, we gotta go!"

"Go where?" I replied. "It's only 4:00 and you said that game night was at 7. So we can stay here a little longer."

"No, we can't. We need to go get ready!" was all that Alice said while pulling me up from the sand.

"What are you talking about? It will only take me 20 minutes tops to hop in the shower and change to some jeans and I'll be ready."

"Oh" Alice said as she suddenly stopped on her tracks. "I might have forgotten the little detail that since it's Casino Night we tend to play our parts very well. We actually dress up for the evening."

"Oh, Alice, then I'm going to have to decline. I have nothing to wear that would be suitable for it and that seems like too much trouble for me."

"Nonsense! I'm pretty sure we can find something in my closet for you to wear, so let's just go. Please!?!" her little puppy face was just adorable and made it quite impossible to not comply with her request.

So we made it back up to the house and I was given 5 minutes to get my essentials and toiletry bag. As we got in her car and started backing out the garage I noticed that Edward's car was still there.

"I see Edward is still out on the beach" I said without realizing it.

"Yeah" Alice replied "he'll leave whenever he's good and ready. Don't worry about him; he always makes it to Game Night on time. Especially since he's tonight's planner."

I decided that the best way to deal with the information just given was to keep quiet and process the repercussions in my head. I had agreed to join the Cullen's for another evening. It might have missed my mind at the moment of the agreement that Edward was an active member of the Cullen family and thus I would be spending the evening with him as well. If anything, at least the rest of the Cullen's would be there this evening and be as pleasant as they had been yesterday. I could feel a slight tingle in my hands and my breathing intensifying slightly. So I took the granted minutes of silence Alice had provided while engaged in a phone conversation with Jasper to get myself calmed down.

"_So you got yourself into this situation. No one else forced you to say yes to Alice"._ I said to myself. "_So now, all that is left to do is to stick to the plan of no more panic attacks or nervous breakdowns while in front of an audience and survive this evening. It will work out, just stay close to Alice and don't look or talk to Edward. Yes, that's a great plan! You can do this!"_

"I can do this" I whispered softly.

"Ha? Did you say something Bella" Alice asked.

"Oh, nothing."

"We're already here." She replied.

This second time around the house didn't seem as imposing as it did before, it looked so welcoming and inviting that I couldn't help the slight smile that formed at the edge of my lips.

Alice got out of the car almost running and signaled for me to follow her. So I did. We made it into the living room again, where that beautiful piano stood, we walked over to a set of stairs on the right.

"Second floor has all the rooms" Alice said. "I'll show you around before we start getting you and me ready."

We moved through a wide hallway filled with pictures and family memorabilia. There were doors on either side.

"This is dad's library" Alice said as she opened the first door to the right. "He keeps all his books in here and we sometimes use it when we need do some research." The room looked like an old-English library with dark-stained bookshelves from floor to ceiling and a very beautiful desk in the center. There were books everywhere; I could see myself spending hours and hours in this room without ever getting bored.

"Wow, it's amazing!" I said and I truly meant it.

"Maybe tomorrow you can come and take a look at dad's book collection, I'm sure he would love it."

"Thanks, that would be great." was my reply.

"Ok, let me show you Mom and Dad's room next."

We headed back to the hallway and to the next door on the right. The room that had been hidden behind seemed to come out of the pages of a French neoclassical novel. Everything seemed so rich and luxurious, without being pompous. I could see how this was all representative of Esme, in some way suited her personality since at times she seemed to have a regal aura to her.

"Simply amazing" was all I could say.

"Ok, now let me show you Emmett's and then we'll head over to my room and get ready. I would show you Edward's, but he's so particular about it and would get annoyed at me if we moved something out of place, so I would rather have him show it to you himself."

"I really don't have to see it, by what I've seen from the house I can imagine it." I quickly replied. The prospect of going in his room, especially escorted by him was one I was not looking forward too.

"No, he'll have to show it to you, it's nothing like the rest of the house, we'll just let him do it later." Alice replied. "Here's Emmett's" she said while opening a door on the opposite side of the hallway.

For some reason I had expected an explosion of sorts in Emmett's room, but it was actually quite nice. Yes, you could perceive how he was a sports fan by just looking at the room, but everything was subdued and neatly organized. So after glancing at all his trophies for a couple of seconds we made it out of his room and into Alice's. She was so anxious that she was almost jumping up and down from all the excitement.

"Here's mine!" she exclaimed.

Her room could only be described as simply hers. Although very soft in its color palate choices of whites, soft pinks and purples, it still held an edge of modernism to it. The top of her very large and beautiful vanity was covered with bottles of perfumes, creams and make up essentials. It seemed like a professional make-up artist had set up for an important and very large photo-shoot. I could only laugh at the prospect of seeing Alice navigate with extreme precision through all the bottles and equipment in her vanity area to get precisely what she needed.

She held my hand and walked inside her room escorting me to the edge of her bed.

"So first things first" Alice said. "Let find you something to wear."

Alice turned to a set of double doors to the right of her room. When she opened them I could see a closet that was almost twice as big as her room! She signaled me to join her but I only made it to the edge of the doors. The sight in front of me was unbelievable. It looked like she had her closet fashioned as her own boutique: everything was sorted by color and length, dresses followed by shirts, skirts and pants. The opposite wall held all of her shoes (which were stored in clear boxes with little pictures in front of them), intimate items and accessories. Alice moved over to where the dress section of her wardrobe was and without even looking she stretched her hand and picked out 3 dresses, so fast, that if I had blinked at that moment would have missed it.

"Here you go Bella, I think any of these would look great on you!" she said as she handed me the dresses. "Now go try them on."

"Alice, these still have the price tags on!" I replied. These dresses were the type of dress I would have to save 3 months worth of my salary to purchase. "I can't wear any of these! Don't you have something simpler?"

"Nonsense!" Alice replied. "You are trying them on and choosing one and that's the end of it! I will not argue about this and you will accept it as the final word on the subject" she said as she turned around to look for shoes. "Now go try them on, I'm getting you shoes, you seem to be the same shoe size as me."

I knew she was not going to budge on the subject so I resigned myself and asked where the bathroom was. Hidden between shoe boxes she told me where it was and I made my way over to change.

"And I want to see what they look like on you" I heard Alice say as I closed the door behind me.

I was so overwhelmed by all of this that I moved over to the sink and splashed some water on my face to cool down a bit. The bathroom followed the same trend of extravagance as Alice's entire suite, but I was so nervous that I pushed all thoughts of how beautiful this room was to focus my entire strength in getting these dresses on. The first one in the pile was a strapless pink knee-length dress that had a satin bow on the back.

Reluctantly I put it on and peeked through the doors to see Alice anxiously waiting on her bed to see me come out.

"Let's see!" Alice said.

I walked to the edge of the door letting her see the dress from one side. I personally thought that it was more of her style than mine, and I knew that the face that accompanied me said how uncomfortable I was in the dress.

"No, that one's not it" Alice said. Having her agree with my initial assessment made me sigh in relief and run back to the bathroom.

"Try the blue one on!" I heard Alice say from the other room.

I got out of that pink mess in less time that it had taken me to get back to the bathroom. I took a look at the next 2 dresses. One was a blood red halter top gown. Too much red for my personal taste. The other dress was a midnight-blue gown with a simple A-line design to it, short sleeves and a small v-neck. Its length was just below the knee and had no special adornments to it, but a simple strap on the waist that tied into a little bow. It looked simple and classic, the type of dress that would not call out for attention. I tried it on and was taken aback by how well I looked in this color. I knew that this was the dress I was going to wear no matter if Alice didn't agree.

I stepped out of the bathroom with the other dresses in my hands and motioning to Alice to take them.

"Wow, Bella, that dress looks great on you. Don't even need to try the red one." She said.

"Thanks" I replied.

"Ok, so you can go back into the bathroom and take a shower and stuff. I'll use mom and dad's bathroom and I'll meet you back here to do your hair and makeup." Alice said.

"I really don't want to get that made up" I told Alice. "I'm not really comfortable with all the glitz and glamour stuff."

"Now, you agreed to participate in this Game Night Bella" she reminded me. "And that includes submitting to me doing at least _some_ makeup."

"Ok, just a little and nothing more."

"Deal" Alice said as she stepped over to my to hand me my bag with the stuff I brought over. "Now go get ready and I'll see you in a while."

The next 2 hours were spent being submitted to hair clips, makeup and shoe straps. I was able to take a couple of breaks during this time while Alice worked on herself, but just when I thought I was done for the time, she would come back and "tweak" something new. When she finally said that we were done and ready for the party, I was completely exhausted.

"Oh, come on Bella" Alice said as she pushed me out of her room. "We can't be late! Then I'll be forced to be part of the cleaning crew and I hate that part!"

As we made it downstairs to the living room I could hear voices and background music. I was looking down to avoid any accidental tripping so when I finally made it to the solid floor and looked up I saw everyone I had seen yesterday evening. They were all laughing and talking. Carlisle and Esme were on the left of the piano holding each other and looking as regal as ever. Esme had a beautiful red gown and had her hair pulled in a bun with a beautiful pair of drop earrings framing her face. Carlisle looked the part with a black tuxedo and a bowtie. I saw Emmett and Rosalie on the far side of the room as well. Rosalie had a white gown that hugged her curves and accentuated her beautiful form as golden ringlets fell down her bare back and Emmett looked very handsome, although a bit uncomfortable in a suit and tie. Jasper had joined Alice by this time. He was wearing a tux as well.

Everyone turned at once to look at the new arrivals so that limited my time of admiration for everyone's looks.

"Alice you look as beautiful as always" Jasper whispered to her ear.

"Bella, thank you for joining us again this evening" Esme said. "And might I add how beautiful you look tonight."

Now, I'm not that keen into receiving compliments, and it has been years since I had heard those words uttered towards me by another human being so I reluctantly nodded as I felt my cheeks blushing.

"Thank you for inviting me" was all I could say in response.

"Ok, enough pleasantries and let's get this party started!" said Emmett from the back.

Everyone laughed as we were escorted by Carlisle back to the family room area. I had expected to see it as I had the previous night, but somehow the whole room had been changed to look like a real casino. There was a roulette table at the far left of the room. Another table was placed with chairs surrounding it, which I guessed was for playing the card games and there were even 2 slot machines in the room as well. Towards the dining area a table had been placed with a small buffet and a bar was to its side.

I couldn't imagine how all of this had been placed here in so short time. The night before the room had looked completely different. I followed everyone over to the roulette table as they all took their positions and got ready to play.

"Bella, I'm pretty sure that Jasper won't mind giving you pointers on how to play the games we have tonight, since I'm not that good either" Alice whispered to my ear.

I smiled at her as I nodded. Alice turned to Jasper and said something which I couldn't catch, but by his expression I knew it had to do with what she had just said. He gently let go of her hand and moved over towards me.

"Ok, Bella, for this game it's pretty easy. The ball will spin around the roulette and you are trying to guess which number it will land on. There are also colors associated to each number: red and black. And you can also bet on whether it is an odd or even number." Jasper said low enough that it didn't draw any attention over to us.

I nodded and decided it was not as hard as it had looked.

"Ok, where's the dealer? I need some chips to play!" Emmett said.

"If you wait a minute, I will give you your chips" I heard a voice behind me say. I instinctively turned around to see Edward holding a small case with different colored plastic chips. He looked amazing with an all black ensemble that made his complexion pop and his eyes stand out. I could feel the hairs in my back raising as my face got warmer so I decided to immediately turn around and look at something else. I had to manage getting through this night without any incidents and simply staring at him was not going to help in any way.

"Here you go Bella" I heard him say very close to my ear as he placed some chips right on the table beside me.

He made his way over to everyone and handed them their chips. As soon as this was done, the games started. Alice and Jasper decided to stay and play at the roulette table with Rosalie offering to be the dealer for a couple of rounds as Emmett, Carlisle and Esme moved to the card table with Edward. I decided to stay close to Alice and Jasper.

After a while, I found myself having a very pleasant time at the roulette table with Alice, Jasper and Rosalie. The room was filled with laughs and jokes from everyone, but I tried to stay as focused on my immediate task as I could. Everything was going well until I heard my stomach grumble. I realized just then that I hadn't had anything to eat since lunch, and as my body was still on East-Coast time that meant dinner had been hours ago. I moved over to the buffet display and grabbed a small plate with some appetizers. As soon as I ate some I felt much better. I snuck to the kitchen to clean my plate before anyone could start complaining about how I was a guest and blah, blah, blah. It only took a minute to do this.

As I made my way back, I noticed I was a bit thirsty so I headed over to the bar to get myself something to drink, a glass of soda or something. As I was grabbing a glass and filling it with some ice I heard a voice ask: "Is there anything in particular you would like to drink?"

I knew the instant I heard him that it was Edward and that I was pretty much trapped by the bar. I had to respond and fast. So I turned around and said: "Not really, just getting some soda."

"Well, let me" Edward said as he grabbed the glass out of my hands and took charge of fixing my refreshment. At the moment his hand met mine a bolt of electricity ran up my arm and shocked me. I was startled for a second; I really didn't know how to react.

"Here you go, enjoy" Edward said as he handed me the glass.

"Thank you" I said as fast as I could. I turned around and headed back to where Alice and Jasper stood.

The rest of the evening was pretty entertaining. I avoided Edward as much as I could and even won a round of poker against Emmett with the help of Rosalie, of all people. They were all so nice and pleasant, that I didn't even notice it was past midnight, until the inevitable yawning started.

"You must be exhausted" Esme said. "Want us to take you home?"

"Oh, please don't mind me, you are all having so much fun" I replied "I'm pretty sure I can just rest on the sofa for a little bit and then be fine."

"Nonsense!" said Carlisle. "It's pretty late and we should all be calling it a night already. Alice, why don't you take Bella home? Maybe Jasper can go with you that way you are not alone on the way back."

"Ok, no problem" replied Alice.

I said again my goodbyes and headed upstairs to Alice's room to grab my things. As I was heading back downstairs I heard Alice and Jasper murmuring to each other.

"Is everything ok?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, no problem." Jasper replied, but by the way he moved when he said it I knew that he was lying. "We were just talking about something."

"Oh, Ok" I said. "I can go back to Alice's room for a little bit if you need your privacy."

"Bella, it's nothing like that!" Alice replied. "It's just that Jasper leaves tomorrow for a business trip and I won't see him for the next week and we were hoping to have sometime to ourselves tonight. So I was wondering if it's ok with you if someone else takes you home."

I completely understood where Alice and Jasper where coming from. So I didn't even hesitate with my reply.

"Oh, please" I said "I insist! You two go on and enjoy your evening. I'm pretty sure I won't be left stranded here." I chuckled at them.

They both smiled back at me with immense gratitude in their eyes. "Thanks Bella, I will pick you up tomorrow so you can come hang out here for the day." Alice said.

"It's a deal." I replied.

"I'll go get one of the guys to take you home." Said Jasper. "Alice, can you wait for me outside?"

"For eternity if need be" replied Alice. They looked so in love that it was painful for me to keep looking up. I felt my eyes getting a little wet so I looked down and forced a yawn to hide my feelings and pretend it was just tiredness.

"Let's wait outside" said Alice.

We walked over to the driveway and waited for just a couple of minutes.

"Ok, Alice, let's go" I heard Jasper say. "Bella, I hope you enjoyed yourself tonight. Hopefully we'll be able to hang out once I get back from my trip."

"I had a wonderful time and thanks for all your help" I replied. "Have a safe trip."

"No problem" said Jasper.

"See you tomorrow Bella" Alice said as she turned around towards her car with her arms wrapped around Jasper's waist.

"Have a good night!" I said.

"Ready to go home?" I heard a very familiar voice behind me say. It didn't even surprise me that fate had once more dealt me such a cruel hand by having none other that Edward be my driver. So I just resigned myself and answered back.

"Yes, thank you."

He escorted me to his car and as he had done earlier in the day opened and closed the car door for me as a true gentleman would have done. I positioned myself as close to the door as possible as to avoid any physical contact with him.

He turned his car on and we headed towards Sam's house. There was some music playing in the background, and I figured that as long as I kept my concentration on it I would be able to avoid any conversation. The tune was strangely familiar, and I immediately recognized it as one of my favorites.

"Clair De Lune?" I asked.

"You're a fan of Debussy?" Edward replied somehow a bit surprised.

"I actually am" I said. "This is one of my favorite pieces of his."

"Interesting, it's one of my favorites as well." He said as a little smirk formed in the corner of his mouth.

Now, I'm sure that he's just as human as I am, but somehow, this smile of his seemed to be able to melt me in place. I was pretty much left utterly powerless. So it took quite some strength to yield my eyes away from him and towards the outside of the car.

The rest of the ride was pretty quiet. I was so glad when the familiar scenery of Sam's neighborhood appeared. As Edward parked the car in the garage I took a deep breath to prepare me for the unavoidable conversation I would have with him.

"Thank you for bringing me back to Sam's" I said as I opened the door and started moving out of the car.

Next thing I know there's a hand outside of the car helping me get out. I should have known that it wasn't going to be that easy getting rid of Edward, fate wouldn't be so kind.

"Let me walk you to the door." Edward said.

I simply nodded. We made our way to the door and I started looking for the keys in the bag I had brought to the Cullen's house.

"I hope you don't take this the wrong way" Edward said. "But you look stunning tonight."

"Ahhhhhh" was all that came out of my mouth as the keys that I had finally found fell from my grip and to the ground.

"Let me get those for you" said Edward. He moved over to the door as he had done yesterday and opened it for me. Next thing I know the door is opened and I'm being handed the keys.

"Well Bella, I hope you had a wonderful evening as we all did. It was a pleasure having you join us; I hope you enjoyed yourself as well."

My mind finally started working again and I was able to reply "Yes, thank you, I did enjoy myself." I didn't know what else to say so I decided to go the safe route and just say good night.

"Good night Edward."

"Good night Bella. Sweet dreams." He said as he grabbed my hand and gently kissed it. He grabbed the door and closed it behind him, leaving me completely speechless inside.


	8. Chapter 8 Sweet Music

**A/N:**

**Thank you all for the reviews. Please keep them coming! I'm trying to speed up with my next chapters so I can post them faster. Let me know whay you think!****

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****Sweet Music**

Ch. 8

As I made my way to the bathroom, I noticed that it was brighter that usual. I got ready for my normal run, but decided that instead of going back to the coffee house I would run in the beach today.

I made it over to the kitchen to grab a glass of OJ and noticed that the time in the clock was 7:45. Now, I haven't slept past 5:30 in ages, and this took me by surprise. I figured I better make it a quick run before Alice dropped by so I made it out of the glass doors and into the beach.

It was actually quite sunny by now, but cool enough to make my run a pleasant one. As I let the sounds of the waves formed a rhythm for my running pace follow, my thoughts turned to the events of last night. I still couldn't form a decision as to what to do about yesterday's "encounter" with Edward Cullen. If I looked at what had happened with an unbiased and logical perspective, I could only deduct that his behavior had been that of a complete gentleman. He could not be found at fault, it was all me. After he kissed my hand I was left speechless, frozen in place and feeling things I hadn't felt in years. And most importantly, I didn't dream last night and that really worried me.

I was having an internal struggle. In one hand I felt the most rested I had been in years, having enjoyed a full night sleep. But another part of me kept saying that by not dreaming I was somehow loosing Jacob all over again. My dream, or better called my nightmare, had been a lifeline where I could still be together with Jacob in some way. I still felt that my heart, or what was left of it, was his. Jacob was my life, without him I didn't live, I just existed. I had always felt that by moving on with my life I was betraying Jacob since he didn't have that luxury. And thus I shouldn't have it either. Everything had been "working" until Sam had come up with this stupid vacation. Now I couldn't even trust my own judgment. How was I supposed to endure 1 more week of this? I needed to make a choice and make it soon.

If I could just hold my composure for a little bit longer, be friendly and conversational without seeming detached as I normally was then this week would pass and I could go back to my normal life. Yes, I could try. One week wasn't that hard. Jacob wouldn't mind if I slipped a little with my erratic feelings, he must know how hard all of this is for me, so what if I let my heart skip a beat now and then whenever I was around Edward Cullen; as long as it doesn't go beyond that it should be fine. With my renewed resolution in place I headed back to the house.

"Another day with Alice is another day of unexpected surprises."

I figured I should get ready and have some breakfast before even calling Alice. As I finished drying the dishes I heard the phone ring. I answered and heard a familiar voice wish me a good morning from the other line. My goodness! I could swear this girl was almost psychic.

"Good morning to you too Alice"

"So, are you ready? I'm actually outside your door"

I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it. Today Alice was as giddy as a 5-year-old. I couldn't help but chuckle at the sight.

"Really Alice, are you always this happy and awake?"

"What are you talking about, it's almost 10. I gave you plenty of time to get ready. And yes, I'm always this happy. So come on and let's go back to my house for some girl time."

I had enough time to grab my purse and head out the door. On the way back to the house Alice informed me that she would have to leave me for a while in the afternoon to go drop Jasper off at the airport. I tried to convince her to just drop me off at the house first but she insisted that I should stay at her place.

"It's only going to be for a little while, and besides, you can take that time to visit dad's study and read some of his books. If I bring you back to Sam's you won't want to leave afterwards. I think I know this about you by now."

It was uncanny how well Alice had gotten to know me these past days. It was as if she could tell what my reaction would be before I even spoke. So I decided not to argue with her anymore and just enjoy the day. We made it to her house and headed over to the family room. She had decided that instead of forcing another makeover so early in the day on me, we should watch a movie instead.

I have to agree that I was having a very good time so far. The movie Alice picked wasn't a girly movie at all; it was actually a comedy that had me laughing so hard tears came out. I hadn't laughed like this in so long. I really needed to stop feeling guilty about having fun with Alice. So I pushed those feelings aside and enjoyed the rest of the movie. After a quick lunch, where I finally convinced Alice to let me clean the dishes, we headed over to her room.

"So Bella, I have to leave in about 20 minutes, but mom said she would leave work to be with you while I'm out." Alice said as she put a pair of earrings on. "She should be here in about 30 minutes"

"Really, Alice, I'll be fine." I replied. "As long as I find a good book to read I'll be set."

"I know" said Alice. "But my mom wouldn't hear even dream of having you alone at the house. Don't worry, she'll just check on you to see if you're OK and then go do her thing."

Once Alice got ready we headed over to Carlisle's study where I had to reassure Alice once more before she left that I would be ok. I strolled over to the first bookcase and started reading the titles of some of the books. It seems I was in the Science section of his book collection, since some of the titles I remembered from my college courses and others from books I had researched for some of Sam's more technical studies. Although I loved Science, I wasn't in the mood to read any of these. The next set of bookcases held different material, from historical books to even a section in theology. I headed over to the last bookshelf, where I finally found what I deemed to be the classics section. I glanced over some of Jane Austen's titles, as well as some of Dickens', but decided I was in the mood for some of the Brönte sister magic. I was already reading Wuthering Heights for the ninth time so skipped that one and decided that Charlotte would do. I grabbed Jane Eyre and sat on the very comfortable leather chair in the room. The book seemed to have been well read, but still was one of the most beautiful book editions I had ever seen. It was bound in half red morocco leather with gold accents in its cover. It was so beautiful that I almost placed it back in the bookshelf before opening it. As I started reading I was magically transported to the familiar world of the 1800s and got lost in it until I heard a small knock on the door.

"Hi Bella, I didn't mean to interrupt." Said Esme apologetically.

"Oh, please Esme" I replied. "It's your house, of course you're not interrupting! I was just reading a little bit."

"Oh please don't get up on my account. I just wanted to check up and make sure you were ok. I actually have to step out and head over to the grocery store for a little bit. So please, go back to your reading."

"I can come to the store with you" I said as I placed the book down on the side table by the chair.

"Nonsense!" Esme replied. "I just need to go get some ingredients for tonight's dinner. It won't take me that long. So please, keep enjoying the book and make yourself at home. I'll see you in a little bit." Esme said as she smiled and walked out of the room.

I was actually glad that she had rejected my offer to join her. I was enjoying the quiet reading time I had been given and wouldn't mind extending it for a little while longer. I picked the book back up and continued with my reading. After reading for some time, I started getting a little bit thirsty and decided to go get a glass of water.

As I made my way down the stairs to the living room I heard the most beautiful sound coming from the piano. Musical notes flowed effortlessly through the air. The song being played had classical notes to it but still very passionate and with modulations that proved the composer had intended to keep his/her audience entertained during the entire piece. The song filled me with different emotions, and at the end of the piece left me with happiness and expectancy for more. Once the music stopped I opened my eyes and noticed I had made my way downstairs and had been standing on the landing. As I looked towards the piano where the music had come from I noticed who the player was.

It shouldn't have surprised me to have Edward sitting by the piano. All his family had assured me of his masterful playing abilities. He had started to play a new song. He played with such ease and fluidity, that you could loose yourself just by looking at his hands slide through the keys. This new tune was familiar to me and I easily recognized it.

"Clair de Lune?" I said before I could stop myself.

Edward immediately stopped playing and looked up towards the landing where I stood. He seemed a little startled by the realization that I was the one standing there.

"I didn't know there was anyone in the house" he said.

"Oh, I'm sorry I interrupted" I replied. "I was upstairs in your dad's study and just came down for a glass of water."

"Oh, and is Alice upstairs as well?" said Edward as he got up from his seat.

"No, Alice went to drop Jasper off at the airport and your mom just stepped out of the house to go to the grocery store. I'm just heading to the kitchen and then be back upstairs. I really didn't mean to impose."

"No, that's not what I meant to say. I was just surprised to see you standing there. Normally the house is empty at this time. And please, don't interpret my being slightly startled as me thinking you could ever impose."

"Ahhh" again with the speech impairment. "I'll just go to the kitchen then. Please, don't stop on my account." And I almost ran to the kitchen.

I think I drank maybe 5 glasses of water, one glass because I really was thirsty and the other four to calm my nerves and buy me time. By the second glass I heard the piano again. Now, I just had to make it past the living room really quick and upstairs into the study.

I breathed in deeply and started walking past the living room area. I could feel eyes staring behind my back and if I hadn't heard incorrectly a wrong key being played and as I grabbed the handrail to start making my way up the steps I heard Edward.

"You recognized Claire de Lune."

"Yeah" I said as I held my head down and my shoulders felt slightly downward once I realized I wasn't going to be able to escape so easily. I slowly turned around. "It's one of my favorites."

"I remember you said so yesterday" Edward replied. He gave me one of his little quirky smiles that would just render me useless for a couple of seconds before I could react.

"What's the name of song you were playing before?"

"That one doesn't have a name yet; I'm still working on it." He replied.

"You wrote it?" I was really impressed. "It's beautiful."

"I'm glad you think so. I could play it again if you like." He said as he shifted back into his seat.

"I would actually like that very much." And I truly meant it. To be able to hear that piece of music once more would be an extremely delightful experience and even though the current situation was a bit awkward I could get past it.

"You should come closer then, the acoustics are better by the sofa."

I made my way over to the edge of the sofa and took a seat as Edward started to play the song once more. I closed my eyes as the notes started flowing. Every cord filled me with a different emotion: everything from sudden sadness and despair to utter delightment and happiness. By the time the song finished, I was feeling a bit tired after the emotion roller-coaster it had me in. But above all, the song somehow had been able to lift my spirits and put a smile on my face that I could not erase…


	9. Chapter 9 Old Memories

**A/N: Thank you all for the comments! Keep them coming. I'm trying very hard to have another chapter posted by the end of this week. So the more encouraged I feel, the more inspired to finish!**

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**Ch. 9 ****Old memories**

The rest of the day at the Cullen's was very amiable. I had a nice conversation with Edward about music, which was a feat unto itself since I didn't loose control of myself during this period. While he showed me another of his compositions Esme walked in and was ecstatic to see him playing. It seemed he had neglected to inform his family that although in private, he continued with his passion for music. I saw the opportunity of Esme returning as a way to excuse myself and go back to the study, which I did.

I spent another hour reading until Alice re-appeared. She was not as happy-go-lucky as normal. Having said goodbye to Jasper, if only for a couple of days, was taking a toll on her. I could relate to what she felt so I figured I should to do something that would light up her mood. I convinced her to use me as her personal mannequin for an hour or two and that anything she did during this time would be complaint free. She immediately lit up and went to work. During this time we agreed that she could come over to Sam's and stay for the night, a sort of slumber party. I was not too keen with the idea at first, but Alice had a way with words which impeded my refusal. At the end of my ordeal I had so much hairspray on my head that she had to lend me a pair of sweats and a shirt for me to go take a shower.

Once I was as lacquer-free as I could get, we headed downstairs where the rest of the Cullen's and Rosalie waited. Dinner was as nice as it had been a couple of days ago. Conversation flowed effortlessly and I was so relaxed that I really didn't even have to pay that much attention at keeping my feelings in check. Every now and again I would catch Edward looking at me in a way that made me feel kind of funny, and that would in turn make my heart flutter, but it was kept to a minimum.

As dinner ended, I convinced Esme to allow me to be part of the clean-up crew which made Emmett grin. He was so glad of not being stuck with all the dishes by himself that he placed me in a bear-hug so tight I had to punch him in the arm for him to let me go.

"Bella, sorry about that" Emmett said. "It's just that I really hate doing the dishes."

"Come on" I replied. "It will only take a sec, besides, I'm just here to learn from the dish-washing master. You seem to be an expert at this!" I was laughing at him and it didn't surprise me when I started getting splashed with soapy water in retaliation. In between splashes and laughs we finally finished the dishes and made it back to the family room.

"Where you guys trying to clean each other as well?" asked Rosalie. "You both are soaked!"

We couldn't help but look at each other's appearance and laugh. Emmett went over to where Rosalie was sitting and I found an open space next to Alice by the couch.

The rest of the Cullen's had decided to play an old family video. It had been recorded about 15 years ago and it had Emmett, Edward and Alice as the main characters of their own play, which Emmett had written. Alice had been in charge of costumes, hair and make-up and this explained why they were all wearing capes made of some old bed sheets, why all of them had way too much glittery stuff in their faces and all of their hair was standing up in little spikes. It was simply hilarious! It had been Emmett's idea for all of them to be some sort of super heroes fighting evil and Edward had been placed in charge of the music, which although generally good throughout the entirety of the play, it did include some really bad teen pop material.

Tears were rolling down my face after just five minutes of the home video. I was laughing so hard my stomach was cramping. The dance choreography number by Alice and the boys was memorable, and as it played on the TV Alice convinced both Emmett and Edward to get up and imitate their old dance moves.

My jaw hurt from laughing so much. Once the movie got to the part of them fighting evil to the tune of "Thriller" I almost couldn't control myself. I finally mustered some self-control and saw Rosalie spread on the floor laughing her heart out. As soon as the movie finished, everyone started to control their fits of laughter which I figured was because we were all a bit exhausted from all this excessive laughing.

"Bella, are you ready to go?" Alice asked.

"Sure Alice, I'll wait by the door while you go get your things." I told her.

While I waited for her downstairs I took the opportunity to say my goodbyes to the rest of the family.

"Thank you again for having me over Esme" I said as I gave her a small hug. "I've had a great day." And the funny thing was that I wasn't lying, I had really enjoyed myself today.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." She replied. "You are more than welcome any time."

We both smiled at this. I felt a little pang on my chest. I had been received with open arms into this stranger family and had been more than willing to share time with them but with my own family I was reclusive and sheltered. I pushed them all away when I knew they just wanted to be there for me and help me. I really needed to change this. It was right then and there that I decided I had to call Charlie in the next day or two and start fixing things in our relationship. I would have to do the same with Renee eventually, but that would take more time, I had a lot more issues to deal with her than with Charlie.

"Bella is everything ok?" asked Alice as she made it to the door.

"Oh yes, I just spaced out for a bit."

"Ok, then let's head out." Alice said as she made her way to the main door and I followed.

"Hey Alice wait a sec!" we hear Emmett yell from the other room.

"What is it Emmett?" she asked.

"We were wondering if you guys wanted to get together tomorrow for a BBQ or something. Since it's Saturday Rosalie has off and Mom and Dad said they could make it as well, so if it's not too much of an imposition for Bella…"

"Of course not, I should be the one worrying about being an imposition. How about you all come over to Sam's? It would actually be nice to have all of you over at the house since I haven't spent that much time in it either. So how about we all meet around 1 pm?"

"Sounds like a plan. Don't worry about the food; mom said she would take care of it. And Edward and I will take charge of the games. So if you and Alice can maybe get the drinks that would be awesome." answered Emmett.

"Ok, we can do that in the morning, so we'll see you tomorrow then" replied Alice.

As both Alice and I said goodbye to Emmett, Rosalie stepped in the room and we took the opportunity to say goodbye to her as well. Then we got in Alice's car and headed over to the beach house. The drive over was pretty quiet. I figured Alice was still a bit sad from not having Jasper over and that it would be best to give her time alone with her thoughts. It had been a day of highs for me and I wasn't used to all these emotions, so the quiet time in the car was welcomed by me as well.

Once we got to the house I convinced Alice to go get herself ready for bed and that we would lie down at the sofa to talk for a bit afterwards. This gave me time to take another shower, since I still felt a bit sticky from all that hairspray and soapy water. By the time I made it back to the living room Alice was waiting for me with two cups in her hands.

"Here, I made you some cocoa. Sam always has the good stuff in hand." She said as she handed me a cup.

"Thanks" I replied.

I sat down on the floor, reclining on the sofa and took a sip from the cup. I had to admit that this was one of the best cups of cocoa I've ever had. We sat quietly and enjoyed our drinks for a while. Alice seemed to be thinking about something.

"What's on your mind Alice?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Oh, nothing really" she replied. "It's just that I always get so worried about Jasper whenever he travels."

"I know what you mean" I said. "It's like having him close makes you feel like there's not a problem in the world but once they head out the door or go somewhere then you get all nervous and antsy, especially if when they travel." It wasn't until the words left my lips that I realized I was talking too much and giving out way too much information.

"That's exactly how I feel" she replied. "Bella, I didn't know you had someone."

"Oh, I don't" I said. "Well, not anymore that is." By now my eyes were getting cloudy and I knew that if she kept pressing the issue I wouldn't be able to hold back. Alice had something about her, something so inviting about her personality, were you could trust her with your life if need be.

"What's his name?" somehow she knew exactly what to ask to keep me talking.

"Jacob" I replied in between sobs.

"I'm sorry" she said. "It's ok Bella, we don't have to talk about him anymore." She placed me in a hug.

I completely broke down. "Oh, Alice!" I said. "It's just so hard. I haven't spoken to anyone about him in over 2 years."

"What did he do that was so horrible?" she said and I could hear a small tone of disgust in her words.

"Nothing like that Alice! Oh, please, don't misunderstand! He was great; he's the best thing that ever happened to me. He just…. Well… he just…." I couldn't finish the sentence as a new wave of grief and sorrow took over.

"He just what Bella?" asked Alice in a very low and sweet tone.

I don't know how I was able to control myself enough to answer, but somehow I did.

"He died." I answered.

"I'm so sorry Bella. That's just horrible!" Alice said while covering her mouth with both hands.

Somehow I managed to control my sobbing and keep talking.

"It was 2 years ago. He left with some of his friends for his bachelor weekend 2 weeks before the wedding. They were supposed to drive down the coast and just have some guy time. But somehow on the second day of his trip Jacob's motorcycle was trampled in an accident with a drunk truck driver." Once I got it out I felt as a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. The sobbing continued though.

"Oh Bella!" Alice threw her arms around me and kept stroking my hair. I couldn't stop tears from falling, but I did feel that having Alice there brought some comfort. We were like this for what seemed hours.

"Bella, are you still awake?" Alice asked.

"Yes, Alice, I'm sorry." I said as I straightened up and wiped my face with one of my pajama sleeves.

"There's nothing to apologize for" was her reply. "Actually, I wanted to thank you. I know it must have taken a lot from you to share this with me and I promise you that it won't leave this room."

"Thank you Alice. I really appreciate that."

"No problem Bella. I want you to know that from now on you have a friend you can count on. Doesn't matter the time of day, you can talk to me always."

"Alice, I don't know what else to say but thanks. I know it hasn't been that long since we met but I would like to consider you a friend."

"Bella, nothing to consider! We are friends! You have done so much for me already! You helped me today by keeping my mind of Jasper and I just feel honored to have been able to help you somewhat tonight."

I was grateful to have found such a good friend in Alice. I knew that we were going to be close for the rest of our lives. So I smiled at her. We sat quietly next to each other until I saw that Alice was yawning.

"Alice, I think it's time to go to bed." I told her.

"I guess you're right Bella." She said as we both got up from the floor.

"Have a good night Alice. And thanks for everything."

"Good night to you too Bella." She replied. "I'll see you in the morning."

And we both stepped into our rooms and went to sleep for the night.


	10. Chapter 10 Beach and Sunset

**A/N: Thank you all for reading the story ad well as for leaving me reviews. I appreciate it. As promised, here's another chapter fir this week. Hope you like it!**

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**Ch. 10 ****Beach and Sunset**

I woke up with light tremors all over, a very familiar feeling. I had just dreamt of that dreaded phone call I received from Charlie telling me about Jacob. This meant that my dream was back. While still shaking I wrapped my arms around myself and sighed in relief. For a couple of days I thought I would never dream of Jacob again and I wasn't willing to let go of any part of him left in me, even if it meant that I would never sleep like a normal person.

I got out of bed and got ready for my run. I grabbed my iPOD and headed to the kitchen for a glass of water. It was 5:45 am. Now this was more familiar. I still had to try and not make a lot of sounds since Alice was around, so I gently opened the glass doors and headed over to the beach for a run.

The run was like the ones before my trip, nothing special, just plain 'ol exercise and numbing music to help me not think. I got back into the house and marched directly to the shower. Once I got out of the bathroom and dressed for the day in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt I noticed that most of my clothes were dirty so I did some laundry. I made sure there were enough towels for all the people that were coming today and then headed to the kitchen to make breakfast for Alice and myself.

I was finishing scrambling eggs and had some bacon in the oven keeping warm when Alice walked into the kitchen and took a seat at the stool.

"Is waaaayyy to early to be cooking Bella" she said while scrubbing her eyes and yawning. She looked very funny, all groggy with her hair messy and in her pajamas still, so unlike the picture of outward perfection she always held to.

"No it's not" I replied. "Now would you like some tea or cocoa?"

"Tea would be nice" she managed to reply in between a yawn and a stretch. "You are too awake for this hour. It's only like 7:30 and you seem to be on a roll."

"What can I say? I'm an early riser. Besides, I wanted to make breakfast for you and get some things done around here before everyone arrives."

"I hope you don't mind everyone coming over and making a mess" said Alice. "They just really enjoy having you around."

"Alice, I don't mind at all, and knowing Esme by the time she leaves she won't let anything be out of place. It's going to be fun having them over. Besides, if you're worried that we won't get any time together, we have the whole morning for that. So eat your breakfast and get ready so we can go do something for a couple of hours. How about you take me shopping?"

"Really?" Alice said while her eyes widened in amazement and a smile filled her face. "Yes mam!"

We both finished our breakfast and Alice went to get herself ready as I cleaned the kitchen. I also had time to take the clothes out of the dryer and fold them. I was going to place them in the closet but decided that it made more sense to take my suitcase out and star putting everything back in it. I didn't have much more time left and it would be best to just live out of my suitcase for the rest of the trip.

I came back to the living room and saw that Alice was still getting ready, so I sat down and grabbed my tattered copy of Wuthering Heights and decided to read a bit while I waited. I was reading the part when Cathy is trapped by Heathcliff at the Heights when Alice walks in and grabs me by the hand.

"Ok missy! You said shopping and that is serious stuff. We only have about 2 hours to go shopping and then we have to get the drinks before the rest of my adorable siblings arrive. So let's get going!" she said all of this while pushing me towards the door. I just laughed at her and managed to grab my purse and keys as we headed out.

Now I kind of knew that by mentioning the word shopping to Alice I was getting into a bit of trouble. But I was not ready for the avalanche of clothes that I soon was faced with. First, I didn't think it was safe for any store to have Alice as a costumer and second, who would have thought that such a small boutique could have so many clothes in their inventory? Alice had made it a point to tell me that since we had so little time (really, 2 hours is not enough?) this would be the only store we would visit, and that we were pushing it. She tried on half of the store's merchandise and convinced herself that I was to try the other half.

Everything from pink ruffle skirts to black skinny jeans I was forced to try. After what seemed an eternity in hell I finally convinced Alice that we should head out, but she only agreed after buying me a bag full of clothes. She wouldn't budge otherwise.

On our way back we stopped at the grocery store and grabbed some sodas, juices, drinks as well as ice. I figured we should maybe get disposable plates and stuff so that no one was stuck in dirty dish-cleaning duty today.

We unloaded everything from the car except the 9 bags of clothes that belonged to Alice. She just grabbed a new bathing suit from one of the bags so she could change.

I put all the drinks outside by the patio table as well as all the silverware. I figured I needed a cooler for the ice and since I didn't have a clue as to where it was kept I just placed all the ice in the freezer until one of the boys arrived and could help with this.

Alice yelled from inside the house that I only had 15 minutes to change, which I thought to be irrelevant since I was already wearing clothes.

"Alice, I'm fine. I'm already wearing shorts and a t-shirt. I'm ok" I replied.

"What?" she said. "No way are you wearing that! Now go and wear the new bathing suit I got you, and the new shorts as well!"

"I'm fine like this" I replied.

"Bella, if you don't go change into your new outfit I'm going to be personally insulted and make this afternoon miserable for everyone, especially for you." She finished this sentence by folding her arms across her chest and giving me a look of outrage and spite.

I knew it would be pretty pointless to argue with her, so I reluctantly headed over to the bedroom and grabbed the above mentioned articles of clothing to change. At least the bathing suit was a one-piece and it actually looked nice. It was a dark blue halter neck bathing suit that had a very low back to it, but with the white shorts Alice had gotten that part was at least somewhat covered.

I didn't give my appearance any further thoughts and headed back to the living room where Alice was. She had taken initiative and gotten the cooler to the patio. There was music playing from some sound system somewhere in the house. I was placing the ice in the cooler outside when I heard voices coming from the living room area.

I made my way back inside to say hi to everyone. Rosalie looked simply radiant, with her golden hair flowing down and wearing a very cute red coverall. Emmett couldn't keep his eyes away from her and it took me various tries to get him away from his thoughts and say hi back to me. Carlisle and Esme walked in with their arms full of grocery bags, which I quickly helped put by the patio table. I was strictly prohibited by Carlisle to do anything further since he took his grilling-master persona very seriously and sent everyone down to the beach while the food was being prepared.

I went back in to grab enough beach towels for everyone when I was stopped by Edward's sudden appearance in the hallway.

"Good afternoon Bella. Let me help you with those." He said.

"Um, thanks, but I got it" I replied.

"I insist" he said while he grabbed the towels from my hands. That sudden and brief touch of his hands against mine was enough to stop me cold on my tracks. After 2-3 seconds of zoning out I came back to my senses and followed him outside.

I went and sat by Alice, who had prepared a small area to sit in the sand. Rosalie came and joined us while Emmett and Edward decided to start things off with a game of beach volleyball. Things got very competitive between the brothers, but against all odds Edward won which made Emmett a bit grumpy.

"You cheated" he yelled back at Edward. "I want a rematch."

"Emmett, when are you going to learn to loose?" was Edward's reply. "You always want a rematch whenever I beat you at something. Let's just forget about it and play something else, maybe some football? We can get the girls to join."

"Ok, Rosalie's on my team then. We'll beat the crap out of you this time!"

They both came towards where we were all sitting and proposed the next game idea.

"If you don't mind I'll sit it out since we are missing a player, that way it will be two against two" I said. Me and sports, especially anything that involves a flying ball of some sort do not have a good track record. I've lost count of all the head injuries caused flying objects, especially sports balls.

"Um, I don't think that would be necessary" replied Emmett as he looked over to the patio area back at the house.

We all instinctively turned ours heads around to look over. Somehow Jasper had shortened his trip and came back early. Alice jumped up and ran towards him wrapping herself in his arms and giving him a very loving kiss.

"Ok, enough with the mushy stuff. Get a room!" yelled Emmett. "We have a game to play. Bella, you'll be on my team with Rosy. We always win so don't worry."

I was mortified by the new turn of events. I figured that if I stayed behind Rosalie or Emmett during the whole entirety of the game I could be somewhat safe. Besides, it was only touch football so I couldn't get crushed or anything like that.

Once Jasper and Alice let go of each other and said hi to everyone they were ready to play. Emmett and Edward signaled where the touchdown zones were and everyone got in their positions. I knew Emmett was very competitive and sports-driven but I didn't expect Rosalie to be so as well. Together, they were a well-oiled machine and a force to contend with. For the first-half of the whole game I barely moved from my position and we still seemed to manage a 10-point lead over the other team.

When half-time was pronounced, everyone marched over to the house to grab a bite to eat. Carlisle had outdone himself, the burgers were amazing. He still promised that for dinner we would have more to eat, so the guys were limited to 3 burgers max. Emmett took the time off to go over our "next plays" with me and Rosalie.

"Ok, so I know we have a nice lead over Edward and the rest" he pointed after finishing the last bite of his third burger. "But we have to keep them guessing. So, that means we're gonna change things up a bit."

"What do you have in mind?" asked Rosalie.

"Well, how about Bella and you take turns as running backs?" was his suggestion.

I could feel the blood drain from my face as the prospect of having a ball thrown at me filled my head with painful memories.

"I don't think that's such a great idea Emmett." I managed to say. "I'm pretty sure the ball will fall down and the other team will catch up with us if you have me catching the ball instead of you or Rosalie."

"Don't be silly Bella" replied Rosalie. "You'll be fine. We won't let them get close. Besides, so far Alice has been your opponent in the game and she's not that good either. This will be perfect Emmett!"

"So it's settled then." Emmett said with a wide grin in his face and a look of determination in his eyes. "We're so going to crush Edward and his ego."

There was no amount of argument that will dissuade those two from their "ingenious" plan of having me in the middle of all the action. So I moved away from then and sat down by where Alice was to try and enjoy the free time we had before the game started and with it my doom. Esme had insisted we take a decent break and let the food settle before starting again, and if Emmett was stubborn Esme was worse.

While Alice and I rested she explained why Jasper had returned so soon from his trip. It seems that when he got to NY the meeting he was scheduled to attend had been postponed for two more days, so instead of staying for a couple of more extra days in NY like his partner did, he took the next available flight back home. He told Alice that even if it meant he would have to fly on a red-eye in two days, he would do it, anything for her. Now even I had to admit that this made me slightly jealous of Alice, she had someone who would do anything to be with her. And this made me think once more of Jacob which made my heart sting a little more.

"Oh Bella" said Alice. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you upset. I don't even know how I could go on and on without taking into account how you might feel. I'm such a bad and inconsiderate friend."

"Please Alice, there's nothing for you to apologize for. You're happy and you wanted to share that with me. And I'm happy for you, really, I'm glad you have someone like Jasper to love. Don't worry about me, I'm fine." I said with a half-smile painted on my face.

I could see that Alice hadn't believed a word I said. But she at least had the decency and wisdom to let me be. She just grabbed my hand and held it in hers while we both sat quietly. My stinging heart quieted down in time to hear Emmett pronounce that the game was back on. Maybe some physical pain would be the required medicine for me right now, so I welcomed the prospect of being mauled during the game.

Everyone got in their positions like before. As soon as Emmett got a hold of the ball he passed it to Rosalie who scored the first touchdown of this half. The game went on as it had before, with me safely in the background and protected from the ball. I thought Emmett had changed his mind about his decision of changing strategies, but I was sadly mistaken. During the last play of the game, in which we were now even, he came over to were Rosalie and I were to let us know that now was the time to come out with our master play. Everyone got to their positions. Emmett winked at me as he grabbed hold of the ball and threw it at me.

I don't really know what happened next. Somehow I grabbed the ball and my feet responded by running over to the end zone. I managed to cross the touchdown line but as I did I tripped over something and lost my balance. I foresaw the inevitable so I closed my eyes, I knew I would get a nasty bruise from this fall and didn't need to see it happening. The only positive thing out of all of this was that at least Emmett had his victory. Somehow the landing wasn't as painful as I imagined. Something had broken my fall. When I finally had the courage to open one of my eyes I saw what had broken my fall, or better said, who had broken the fall. I was in Edward's arms lying right on top of him.

From my vantage point I could admire the way the sunlight made his perfectly messed hair shine in perfect harmony with the rays of the sun as well as his eyes adding a new golden glint to them. I could feel his breath on my cheek, which was cool and sweet smelling. He smelled wonderful and having his body against mine felt like heaven. I could easily spend the rest of my life in his arms like this. But what was I thinking, what was I even doing in his arms?

I managed to get a hold on my thought and have the rest of my body respond as I tried to get out of his grasp and back to an upright position. He seemed to have been paralyzed for a moment or two as well and as I got out of his grasp he was suddenly brought back to reality.

"Bella, are you ok?" he asked while offering his arm for me to take as support while getting up.

"I'm fine." I said rather curtly as I stepped as far away as I could. "I guess I should thank you for catching me." I needed to escape from this entire situation so I got up without his help and dusted myself from the sand as I turned around.

I saw Alice and the rest running over to where we were.

"Bella, are you ok? That fall would've been horrible; you could've easily sprained an ankle or something!" Alice stated.

"I'm fine Alice" I replied. "I just need a moment. I'm going to go wash my face." Without any further explanations I went inside and took refuge in the bathroom.

By the time I closed the bathroom door I could feel tears running down my face. I was too overwhelmed with emotions. It had felt amazing having Edward's arms around me as his body pressed against mine, but now I just felt guilty and dirty. I knew that I was punishing myself but I couldn't help it. It took a while for me to manage some self control. I washed my face and took some deep breaths. I had to go back outside with my game face on, I had the rest of the day to spend with the Cullens and none could suspect how broken I really was. It was bad enough to have Alice already apologizing for being happy.

I made it outside with the fakest smile I could muster. Everyone except Edward asked if I was ok, which required extra effort from my part to assure that I was. After my fall Esme and Carlisle had suggested that maybe we were done with beach games for the day, which I was glad to a degree. I sat down by Alice and Jasper and closed my eyes.

"Hey Bella, we're going for a swim. Want to come?" Alice had asked after a while.

"No, it's ok. You two go ahead. I'll just rest here for a while." I replied. "And I know what you're going to say next, put some more sunscreen on." I told her as I held the bottle of sunscreen up for her.

"Ok, then I guess we'll see you in a bit." Alice said as both she and Jasper got up and started walking over to the water.

Emmett and Rosalie joined them. I took the much needed quiet time to calm myself more and repeat over and over in my head how everything was going to be fine, how I only had a little while longer to endure.

It seems I dozed of for a long time because Alice had to wake me up and tell me that it was time to eat. Thank goodness Jasper had placed one of those beach umbrellas by where we were sitting and that I had put a towel on top of me as well, because if not I would be as red as a lobster.

The nap had done wonders for my emotions. I was back to being somewhat calm and collected, so during dinner, which was amazing by the way, I made an effort to be a very pleasant participant.

Carlisle refused my help in cleaning up, he told me to go enjoy the sunset with the rest of the group. Esme was as adamant as he was so I had no other choice but head back down and join younger Cullens and their partners.

Although I rather be alone in a quiet and dark room, I had to admit that watching the sunset was amazing. I felt a little awkward sitting by Alice and Jasper, since they were cuddling and having a quiet conversation in between whispers to each other's ear. So I got up and moved over to where Emmett and Rosalie where sitting, but after 5 minutes I could see they wanted their privacy as well. I simply got up and decided that a walk might do me some good, so I started walking along the shore.

"May I join you?" I heard Edward ask.

To be truthful I would rather watch Emmett and Rosalie's make-out session, but I knew that he felt as out of place with all these couples as I did, besides, I had been extremely rude to him earlier. I nodded in consent. We walked quietly alongside the beach for a while. It seemed we were both hesitant to talk. So I mustered some courage out of somewhere and started the conversation.

"I wanted to say thanks for earlier" I told him. "I'm sorry if I was a bit rude."

"Your welcome" he replied. "No need to apologize."

We were quiet for a bit longer. I took this time to look at the setting sun once more. Its last rays were sending small waves of light that looked as a symphony of colors reflected by the sea. Everything was so peaceful. I was so taken aback by the view in front of me that I just stopped to watch the spectacle. Edward followed my lead.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" he asked.

"It certainly is" I replied. "We don't get sunsets like this in the East Coast. It's been ages since I saw one in the West."

"I'm glad you're enjoying it." Edward replied. "Every time I see one of these I'm overwhelmed or by the beauty of it all. That's why I love being by the sea. It's a place of peace for me. There's no one to interrupt you or nothing to keep your thoughts away. You can loose yourself for hours by just watching the waves go back and forth."

I didn't know what to say in response so I just stayed quiet. We just stood right next to each other watching the sun go down. It was getting darker and we had some walking back to do, so we headed back to the house. As we were walking in silence I saw that Edward bent down and grabbed something.

"Here" he said. "So you can always remember this sunset." He handed me a medium-sized scallop shell with golden colors. It's simplicity added to its beauty.

"Thank you" I replied. I took hold of the seashell and kept looking at it all the way back to the house…


	11. Chapter 11 Phone Call

**A/N: It's not a very long chapter but a necessary one. I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know what you think about the story so far. Next couple of chapters will help Bella put things in perspective. Hope you like it! Please, review!!!!!!**

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Ch. 11

**Phone Call**

It was bright and sunny when I walked over to the kitchen. Everyone had pitched in with cleaning duties yesterday before leaving, so that meant that today there was nothing for me to do except mope around the house. Alice had convinced me of getting together in the afternoon, so at least that gave me the entire morning to myself. I wasn't in the mood for running today so I decided to indulge in a big breakfast instead. I had a giant-sized cup of hot cocoa- the stuff is addicting- with pancakes and bacon on the side. By the time I was finished cooking and eating I noticed the mess I had made on the previously spotless kitchen so I had no other choice but to clean for a good half-hour to get the kitchen back to its previous shining luster.

I was putting the kitchen towel back in its place when I got this gut-wrenching feeling take hold of me. It was like some sixth sense telling me I had to call Charlie. That's when I remembered I had told myself yesterday that I was to call him. I really needed to start making some changes; living like I had been doing for the past 2 years was destroying not only me but the relationships I had with everyone I had loved. I walked over to the living room and grabbed the phone. I sat on the couch for what seemed like an hour before even having the courage of dialing the number. It rang a couple of times before a familiar voice answered.

"Hello?" I heard the familiar voice ask.

"Hi dad, it's me" I answered.

"Bella! Is it really you?"

"Yes dad, it's me."

"Oh Bella! This is such an unexpected call!" I could hear a little hint of emotion behind his tone. This was not typical in Charlie. Something was not right.

"Dad, is everything ok?" I had to ask.

"Bella, I was actually going to call you today. I'm so glad you beat me to the punch. I have something to tell you."

"What is it?" now I was the one with a tinge of desperation in her tone. I had to calm myself if I was going to keep this phone conversation going on.

"Ummmm, I don't really know how to say it so I'm just going to tell you. Billy's been in the hospital for a couple of days now. He's very sick Bella. The doctors don't think he'll make it through another week."

"Oh dad!" was all I could say. I could feel my insides breaking yet again. I was glad I had been sitting down; I don't think I would've been able to stand up for this.

"Bella… he's been asking for you. You need to come home."

My mind blanked for a second taking the rest of my body prisoner as well. I was utterly speechless. I didn't know what to say or what to think. The repercussions to what Charlie had just said were sinking in. To see Billy and Charlie again after so long would break the façade I had built for so long. And that meant that I would have to face the ghosts of my past. I had no choice, I just couldn't let Billy go without respecting his wish of seeing me again. Jacob would want me to be at his dad's side during this time. Anything for my Jacob, even if it meant putting me aside.

"Bella, are you still there?"

"Yes dad, I'm here." I sighed. "I'll be on the next flight out. Don't worry about picking me up, I'll get a car. I'll see you soon." I hung up before he could reply.

I knew I had to find a way of getting to Forks, my brain was calculating everything while my emotions were still detached. I got up and went to the bedroom. I grabbed everything that was in sight and threw it inside the carry-on.

I walked with the carry-on back to the living room. One thought came to my mind and that was that I needed to make it to the airport somehow. I could call a cab, but I was so nervous I didn't even know where to look for the phone number for the taxi service. It was then that I decided I would call the one person I knew the number to.

"Hi Bella! Didn't expect you to call me so early!" Alice replied.

"Alice, I..." I tried to say as a sob was caught in my throat. "I need you to take me to the airport."

"What's the matter Bella? You don't sound ok."

"I have to go home… I can't… tell you… over the phone…please hurry."

"I'll be there in fifteen minutes." She replied before hanging up.

The minutes passed without me noticing. Alice arrived and had me in her arms before I could manage even a word. She didn't press the issue and just took my bag over to her car. I just followed her lead. We got in the car. She drove for a while before she spoke.

"Bella, what's wrong?" she asked. "You know you can tell me anything. Please, you are scaring me."

Everything came rushing in at once and I just broke down. She placed her hand on top of mine and that helped. I was able to get from constant crying to a pattern of intermittent sobs.

"It's Jacob's dad… he's in the hospital" I managed to say.

"Oh Bella! I'm so sorry!" Alice replied.

"I just have to go see him. I…. just…." Was all I could say before the crying took hold.

"I understand. You don't need to say anything else."

After a while longer I was able to control myself. I think it was pretty much because of Alice, she was here comforting me and that helped in leaps and bounds. At this moment I was so glad to have her right beside me. She was a true friend and that meant so much. The prospect of what was waiting for me in Forks was just too overwhelming, I wasn't sure I would even make it to Forks in my current state.

"Bella, I'm going with you" Alice stated while parking her car in the airport's garage.

"No Alice! I couldn't possibly…."

"No buts about it. You can't simply expect me to have you fly by yourself in your current state. You need someone with you, and I intend to be that person."

I couldn't deny the fact that I was glad to have such a friend and that having her coming with me to Forks made me feel somewhat at ease.

I simply sighed and said "Thank you Alice."

She simply nodded and got out of the car. I just followed. We walked over to the airport and made it to one of the airlines to purchase tickets for the trip. I was able to give the lady at the desk the details of where I wanted to go but we couldn't find anything to Seattle, which meant we would have to go to Portland and drive from there. I was like a robot throughout the whole buying tickets, checking in and making it through security checkpoints process; it wasn't until we were sitting by the gate that my head started to clear up and realize what had just happened.

"Oh Alice, what are you going to do for clothes?" was the first thing that popped in my head and instinctively came out of my mouth.

"Good thing I always have an overnight bag in my car with daily essentials and 2 changes of clothes." She replied with a smile as she pointed to a bag lying next to mine. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't really know" was my honest answer. "I'm glad you're here with me though, I don't know how I would've been able to make it."

"I'm glad I'm able to help" she replied. "I have to call my mom and Jasper to let them know. Is it ok if I leave you for a couple of minutes?"

"Of course!" I told her reassuringly. As she stepped away I saw her grab her cell phone and start talking. I had completely forgotten that she had a family of her own that would want to know where she was. I was not going to be able to repay her for this.

"Jasper said that he's going to take care of the car rental for us" Alice mentioned once she was back. "And mom said to tell you that if you need anything to please let her know. I had to convince her that we were ok, she was about to come to the airport and come on the trip."

"Oh Alice I could never!" I replied.

"Don't worry. Dad was able to calm her down. But she made me promise that YOU would call her once we arrived at your dad's."

"I will." I replied.

Even though Alice had only known me for a couple of days, she seemed to have a keen sense of when I needed to be left with my thoughts. So she just sat quietly next to me until they started boarding the plane.

"Bella, I went ahead and changed our seats so that we could be more comfortable." She shyly confessed. "Your seat is 3A and mine's 3B."

I should be mad at her for going and spending God knows how much to get us into First Class, but I had other things to worry about so I just let it pass. We boarded the plane without any problems and next thing I knew we were up in the air. Alice was able to get me to talk a bit and put some of my stress in the back burner during the flight. She even managed to have me laughing for a while when she told me a story about Emmett and the tutu incident.

As we landed in Portland I reached over and grabbed Alice's hand. She held to it in such a comforting way that helped me to relax and breathe. We made it out and towards the baggage claim area where we would get into the shuttle over to the car rental company.

Alice had to check the voicemail Jasper had left giving her the info, but that only took a couple of seconds. She told me she would call him back once we were in the car, which against my wishes, since I wanted to cover the costs, Jasper had paid for.

By 5:15 we were in the shuttle and by 5:45 we were in a spanking new Yellow Porsche. I really wanted the Hybrid but Alice's eyes had zoomed in to the car and there was no refusing her.

"I've always wanted to drive this car" Alice acknowledged. "It's like a dream."

"Just don't drive too fast, ok?" I pleaded. I had been exposed to my fair amount of Alice's driving to know that the 4 ½ hour drive that awaited us would be completed in at least 4 hours, especially since we were in this car.

The drive over to Forks was pretty uneventful. I took my time to explain to Alice in further detail why this trip was so traumatic for me and she let me take my time during this. She handed me the phone so I could call Charlie and let him know I would be coming with a friend, which only took a couple of minutes. He seemed very glad to know that I had someone with me and grateful to her as well. Alice called Jasper and thanked him for making the car reservation, but couldn't help rubbing in the fact that she was driving the car of their dreams, which he laughed off.

I tried as hard as I could to not think of what tomorrow would be like nor how Charlie was going to react when he saw me, so I just let the tunes in the radio and the sweet voice of Alice entertain me for the rest of the trip back HOME…


	12. Chapter 12 Back in Forks

**A/N:**

**So sorry for having you guys wait so long for another chapter. Work has been crazy and I needed tome for inspiration too. If you could leave a review I would love it! It gives me a boost and helps me with my inspiration problems. Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

**Ch.12 ****Back in Forks**

As we drove through the very familiar streets I started getting a bit antsy.

"Turn left here" I told Alice.

Familiar houses started to fill my line of vision, I knew we were close but hadn't realized just how close we really were.

"Is the house up the curve, the one on your left." I told Alice.

She moved up the driveway and parked next to my dad's cruiser. After all this time the cruiser still had that dent I made on it with Jacob's motorcycle one day when he had tried to teach me how to drive it. That little dent immediately brought back all the memories I had tried to keep back since landing in Portland. I took a deep breath and escorted Alice to the main door. I only knocked twice, knowing that Charlie was probably in the sofa watching some sports game.

Ten seconds after the second knock the door opened and I saw a very disheveled and tired-looking Charlie. He was so thin and looked so fragile. As if he hadn't eaten or slept in ages.

"Bella! I'm so glad you made it home!" he said as he wrapped his arms around me.

We stood there holding each other for a while. It felt like home, and having Charlie's arms around me had been something I had missed for the longest time. I couldn't help the sobs that escaped and when he finally let go I could see that it hadn't been just me crying.

"Can we maybe come in? It's a bit chilly." I tried to shift his attention from me to my friend. "Dad, this is Alice."

"Oh, where are my manners?" Charlie said as he took both of our bags and signaled us to come in. "It's so nice to meet you Alice, and thank you for coming with Bella."

"It's nice to meet you too Mr. Swan." Alice replied.

"Oh, please call me Charlie" he replied. "Anyone that's willing to travel all the way to Forks with my Bella has the right to skip all civilities. Besides, Mr. Swan makes me sound a little bit old."

Alice couldn't help but smile at my dad. I knew him better, and by the way he was talking to Alice I knew he had immediately fallen for her. She would be a favorite around here. I made my way over to the kitchen to make some tea, and as I opened the drawers I realized the dire situation of my dad's kitchen. They were pretty much empty.

"Dad, what have you been eating?" I asked.

"Whatever I can find." He replied. "Bella, don't start. You've been in the house for no more than five minutes. Are you girls hungry?"

I had to admit that once he asked my stomach started grumbling, I had completely put my food needs aside and was pretty sure Alice had done so as well.

"Actually, we haven't had dinner yet." I told him.

"Then say no more, I'll order Chinese. Alice, what would you like?"

"Sesame Chicken sounds pretty yummy right about now" Alice replied.

"OK, I'll order food for all of us. Bella, why don't you show Alice the spare bedroom and get settled while the food arrives?" said Charlie.

It wasn't really a question. Slowly Charlie was stepping back to his normal self, which meant that this pretty much was a statement. I nodded and showed Alice to the spare room across from my old bedroom.

"We only have one bathroom, though" I said. "If you want, you can go and use it while I put my stuff away."

Alice knew that I really just wanted to be alone for a little bit. So she took her bag and walked into the bathroom, which had been properly cleaned and stacked with strawberry shampoo and soap (like when I used to live here). I took the borrowed minutes I had to walk into my room for the first time in more than 2 years.

The room was exactly as I had left it. The same light blue walls stared back at me when I entered the room. I moved over to where the bed was, in the middle of the room with the same bedspread I had purchased two months before leaving. I sat down at the edge of the bed and placed my bag on the floor. From this viewpoint I could take the whole room in. My rocking chair was still there, I still couldn't believe that thing was in one piece after all these years. It had been part of the bedroom since before I was born. My eyes moved over to the chest drawer by my bed, where framed pictures of my old life stood.

A silver frame held a picture of Jacob and me during one of our many outings in La Push. I remembered that day. Jacob and I had been dating for a little over a year and he had insisted on me driving over to his house. When I got there, he blind-folded me and took me to the beach, where he had set a picnic for both of us. It was one of the best days of my life and I had been so glad that Jacob had thought of taking a camera with him that day. Now, the picture just reminded me of all the pain and the hurt I lived with. And most of all it reminded me of the reason why I had left all of it behind.

I got up and took the picture in my hands. My eyes were filling with tears and I knew that if I kept staring at the picture I would become as useless as I had been two years ago. So I opened the bottom drawer of the chest and threw the picture inside it. With my foot I closed the drawer and moved back to the bed. I started to breathe deeply so I could calm myself down and it seemed to work a bit.

As I was sitting in the bed I heard a knock on my door.

"Who is it?" I said.

Charlie peered into the room and looked a bit hesitant to come in further. I could see him taking a deep breath and opening the door a bit more to fit more of his body, as if walking into the room took more strength than he had.

I got up and moved over closer to the door, trying to ease the awkwardness that the whole situation was creating.

"Bella, I just wanted to talk to you for a second, if that's OK." Charlie finally said.

"Of course dad, come in." I signaled him to come and take a seat in the rocking chair.

He followed my lead and sat down in the rocking chair as I sat by the edge of the bed. We were quiet for a while. It seemed that Charlie was trying to find the words to say. He finally broke the silence.

"Bella, I'm really glad you came home. Even if it's because of Billy." He looked down to his hands. "I've been trying to find a way to tell you about it since we spoke on Christmas, but I could never find the right words or the right time. And now I feel so guilty, because you should've known about it and I just didn't have the guts to tell you."

"Dad, I don't blame you for anything. I know I haven't been the easiest person to talk to for a while, and I'm just glad I was able to make it here on time." I told him while hiding my face from him.

I just acted on instinct and looked up to where he was sitting before I said: "Dad, I'm so sorry for how I've acted for the past couple of years, it's just that it's been too hard. Just coming here has brought back all these memories that I've tried to bury, to run away from. I used to think that by seeing you, or even talking to you would break me again. But I don't regret coming here today. I have to do this for Jacob. I have to see Billy. But I'm still not ready to talk to you about what happened. Not just yet, OK?"

Charlie got up from the rocking chair and moved over to where I was sitting. He wrapped his arms around me and held me in a tight embrace as he whispered these words in my ear: "I'm just glad to have you back. Take all the time you need. I'm going to be here for you always. But don't shut me out again, OK?"

In between sobs I was able to nod my head as Charlie let go of me. He took a handkerchief from his pocket and used it to dry my tears. He gave me a tender kiss on the forehead and let go of my hands.

His look was so tender, as if I was too brittle and could break easily.

"The Chinese food is here. I'll go get some plates and you can come down with Alice when you're ready. But don't take too long or it will get cold."

He walked out of the room and left me with my thoughts. He was still the same Charlie, only a little skinnier and paler. He still wanted to take care of me, even after the way I had been with him. I sighed in relief and headed out the door to Alice's room. I knocked and was received by an Alice with a towel wrapped around her head.

"That shampoo smells amazing!" She said.

I just laughed! Of all the things she could have said she picked the one thing that would take all my worries away and bring me back to a semi-normal state.

"Dinner's here." I told her. "Want to come down, or do you need to put some make-up on to complete the look?"

"Don't be silly Bella" Alice replied. "I'm sure Charlie can appreciate me even with a turban."

We were laughing as we headed downstairs. The smell of the food took over and we just followed the sweet scent to the dinner table. Charlie had already placed some plates, napkins and silverware for us and was getting us drinks when we walked in.

"OK ladies, just dig in!" he said.

We both nodded and followed orders. I was really hungry and by the way Alice was attacking her food I could tell she was hungry as well. The entire dinner affair was quiet, everyone seemed too engrossed in their food to talk of anything. Once it was finished, I helped Charlie with the dishes as Alice was ordered to sit in the living room.

I had finished with the dishes and headed over to the living room. Charlie came behind me and handed Alice the remote, an action that simply left me speechless.

"Here." Charlie told Alice. "Look for something you might enjoy."

Alice nodded and immediately put herself on the task of finding something to watch for a while. A rerun episode of Project Runway was playing on the TV and she was immediately mesmerized by the entire episode. I sat next to her while Charlie sat in his recliner.

"Bella" Alice told me during the commercial break. "You promised to call mom once we got here. She must be worried."

I had completely forgotten about it. I nodded and got up moving towards the phone by the kitchen. I picked up the phone and dialed the all-too-familiar phone number. After the second ring I heard a voice on the other line answer.

"Hello, Cullen residence." His velvety voice filled the line.

I lost my train of thought for a couple of seconds but managed to snap myself out of the Edward trance to reply: "Hi Edward is Bella. I was wondering if I could speak to Esme."

"Bella! It's so nice to hear your voice. How was the flight?"

"Um, it was fine. We got here a little while ago and just finished dinner with my dad."

"Well I'm glad you're both fine. Mom has been worrying sick for the both of you and has us all in phone duty. I'll go get her for you. Wait a second." I heard a noise that sounded like the phone receptacle had been put down.

"Hello, Bella?" I heard the familiar motherly tone of Esme on the other line.

"Hi Esme. I just wanted to let you know that we arrived safely." I replied.

"I'm glad. I know you wouldn't have left so suddenly if it hadn't been an emergency." Esme told me. "I went by Sam's house and picked up a couple of things you left behind. I'll give them to you the day after tomorrow."

"Esme, what do you mean the day after tomorrow?" I asked.

"Oh, well, we've decided that you need us and we are going to meet you and Alice in Forks in two days. Carlisle needed to get some things straight at the hospital and Jasper had to change his business trip itinerary."

"Esme, I don't know what to say. You really don't need to do this." I said. This information just brought a whole list of repercussions that I was not ready to face just yet.

"Nonsense! We want to be there with you and we are NOT taking no for an answer. We already called Sam and spoke with him. He'll be there tomorrow. He told us how much Billy means to both of you, so we want to be there to support you both. Now no more fussing and just relax sweetie."

Although I wanted to be mad at Esme for having her entire family intrude in my personal space but I just couldn't. This would be hard enough as it was. And having people who cared about me close would help me get through anything.

"Thanks Esme" I sighed. "I'll get Alice on the phone so you can speak to her." I placed the phone down and went to get Alice. She went straight into the kitchen to talk to her mom and I slumped down in the sofa.

"What's the matter?" Charlie asked.

"Nothing, it's just that Alice's family has decided to come to Forks too. They want to be supportive." I told Charlie.

"Bella, be grateful. You are lucky to have people like that in you life." Charlie replied as he got up from his recliner and moved over to the sofa. He placed my hands in his and waited until I looked up to continue. "You are very special, I can see how much Alice cares for you and I bet her family does as well. Let them help you. I know how hard this all is. " He squeezed my hands gently before letting go of them and wrapping me in an embrace.

He was right; I knew that after tomorrow I would need a lot of support. So I took a deep breath and told him I was ready for bed.

"Have a good night Bella" Charlie said. "Sleep tight and don't let the bedbugs bite!"

That made me smile. This had been the same phrase I had heard for all of my childhood whenever Charlie put me in bed, which was almost every night. I walked upstairs to my bedroom and took out my toiletry bag from the carry-on by the bed as well as my pajamas and headed to the bathroom.

I got ready for bed and headed back to my room. As I brushed my hair I kept thinking of what awaited for me tomorrow. I would have to be strong to face not only Billy but Rebecca and Rachel as well. I hadn't seen them in so long. I wondered how they were. They had always been so kind to me. Tomorrow, I would deal with all of this tomorrow.

I put the hairbrush down and got in bed. As I grabbed the pillow to accommodate myself, I felt something hard underneath. It was an envelope. As I opened it I saw that it was in fact a greeting card. I took the card out. It was one of these cards that has a black and white picture in front of it with a boy handing the girl a red rose. I opened the card and the familiar handwriting of Jacob filled all the blank space inside.

I proceeded to read the card:

_My dearest Bella:_

_You might be surprised to find this card under you pillow (I had to bribe Charlie with a fishing trip once we get back from our honeymoon) but I couldn't leave for my trip with the boys without at least leaving you with something. I know I will be gone for only a weekend, but for me it seems an eternity. I want to spend every waking moment with you and every sleeping moment next to you and having you in my dreams. I truly love you, and I think of myself as the happiest and luckiest man alive. _

_To have found you so early in my life gives me joy, because I will get to spend the rest of my life taking care of you and protecting you. You are the most valuable gift that God could have given me, and I can't wait to call you Mrs. Black._

_I know that you must be blushing by now, but I had to write this. I want you to be happy always. I could die right now and I would go on gladly because I have known what it is to be completely loved. You have given me so much joy; your smiles are like the rays of the sun filling my life. Your kisses are the food which feeds my soul. And having you hold me can turn the worst of days into the happiest day of my life._

_I will love you always and forever._

_Yours, Jacob_

_P.S. I will be collecting my reward in 2 weeks ;)_

I don't even know how I was able to finish reading the card. I was in tears, and as much as I tried I couldn't keep the sobs from coming. I gave completely into my grief. I thought the pain was going to just consume me when I felt a pair of hands stroke my hair. It was Alice. She had come in to say good night when she found me crying in the bed. I couldn't form any words so I just handed her the card for her to read. Tears formed in her eyes as well and she lifted me up to give me a hug.

"Bella, I'm here for you" was all that Alice said. Somehow those few words filled me with comfort and I was able to stop crying.

"Don't leave me yet" I pleaded with her.

"I'm not going anywhere tonight." And she pushed me gently making some space in the bed for her as well.

She started to sing a very soothing lullaby and with her hands stroking my hair I was able to finally go to sleep….


	13. Chapter 13 To the Hospital

**Ch.13 ****To the Hospital**

I woke up feeling a bit emotionally drained. I tried to make as little noise as possible since Alice was still sleeping when I grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of jeans and left the room. I headed over to the bathroom to change and to brush my teeth. Once I finished with the normal bathroom tasks and went to fix my hair I saw what a mess it was. Since the brush was still in the bedroom, I just tied it all in a bun on the small of my neck and left it at that.

I went over to the kitchen and since it was empty I decided to walk over to the convenience store a couple of blocks away to get some things for breakfast. I grabbed my dad's old jacket and some money from my purse, which thank goodness I had left in the living room and headed out. It was pretty dark outside, but that had always been the case in Forks.

It was a bit chilly, but what could you expect here in Forks if not chilly weather and not a sunny day in sight? It's the perfect climate if you like to feel depressed all the time, maybe I should've stayed here instead of moving to NY, it goes better with my moods. As I kept entertaining the ideas of how depressing Forks actually was I made it over to the convenience store in no time.

I grabbed some eggs, a gallon of milk and brad as well. I was so glad they had vanilla and cinnamon that I immediately decided that I would make French toast. I was looking for some syrup when I heard my name being called.

"Bella Swan? Is that you?" a female voice asked.

I turned around to see a very tall girl standing behind me. She had medium-length brown hair with golden highlights. Once I looked into her deep brown eyes I recognized her immediately.

"Angela?" I replied. "Is that really you?"

The smile that planted in her face was all the answer I needed to know that this was my high-school BFF. She closed the gap that was between us and gave me a big hug.

"Is so nice to see you! I've been so worried about you!"

"Nice to see you too Angela" I said.

"So where have you been? It's been a long time since I last saw you and heard from you. Did you get my Christmas card?"

"I've been OK. I'm sorry I've been such a bad friend. I did get your card. Thank you. It was lovely. But how have you been?"

Angela had known better than anyone when to not push a subject. So she just fell into old habits and told me all about her life in Forks, how after college she came back and ended marrying Ben. They had a baby boy and she was getting some emergency diapers. She made me promise to come by her house later so I could meet her bundle of joy and we could catch up.

"OK, Angela. As soon as I get a chance I'll stop by. I promise." I said. "It's really nice seeing you again."

"It's great seeing you too!" she said as she gave me a goodbye hug and a quick kiss on the cheek.

I paid for all the stuff I had and made my way back to the house. As I walked in I could smell the coffee brewing. I was received by both Alice and my dad having a conversation by the kitchen counter.

"Good morning" I said as I walked in. They both stopped talking and looked over to where I was.

"I was wondering where my jacket went" Charlie said.

"I went to the store to get some things for breakfast" I informed him. "I'm going to make French toast, want some?"

"That sounds yummy!" Alice replied. "Can I help with something?"

"Yeah" I replied. "You can get some water boiling for tea. I'm not into coffee." Turning over to Charlie I said: "dad, how many slices of French toast do you want?"

"Four" he replied.

As Alice worked with making the tea I started making the French Toast. A couple of minutes later we were sitting in the dinner table having breakfast. Conversation was light. Charlie was talking to Alice about all the places she should visit while in Forks (which mainly consisted of his job, Newton's Olympic Outfitters' and the Indian reservation). At the mention of the last place I grew extremely silent, which was noted by both and to which Alice went and changed the subject.

"I'll have to drive to Port Angeles tomorrow" she told us. "My family was able to book tickets arriving in the airport there."

"Want me to go with you?" I asked.

"No Bella, you'll be busy with other things. Don't worry about it. It's only a 45 minute drive, so don't sweat it." She said as she held my hand for a quick moment.

"Where are they going to stay?" asked Charlie.

I was curious to know myself.

"Mom told me she found this adorable bed and breakfast in Port Angeles called the Five SeaSuns, and that they had enough rooms for everyone. So she already booked it. But they want to come by and see you Bella, and meet you too Charlie."

"I'll be more than glad to have them over. How about tomorrow evening for dinner? Bella, you don't have to cook. I'll go get some food from Bella Italia, you always liked their mushroom ravioli, didn't you Bella?"

"Well dad, wouldn't it be better to meet the Cullen's in Port Angeles instead? The restaurant is already there and then they wouldn't have to drive back and forth after traveling all day." I told Charlie

"Yeah, I guess that makes more sense." Charlie replied. "I'll call and make the reservation then. I'll just need to know for how many."

"Six" I said at the same time that Alice answered: "Nine."

"What?" asked Charlie who seemed confused.

I looked over to Alice and said: "I thought it was only Jasper and your mom and dad who were coming."

"Oh no!" Alice replied. "The whole family decided to come. Even Rosalie's coming. So that makes it nine with us Charlie."

I was left speechless. I was preparing myself to deal with Carlisle and Esme coming, but having Edward here as well? That was something I was NOT ready for. I needed to think and that's what I did for the rest of breakfast while Charlie and Alice ironed out the details of tomorrow's dinner. After we were all finished Charlie took control of the cleanup duty so I could go get ready. We would be heading to the hospital soon.

I went upstairs to change. The jeans I was wearing were ok, but I definitely needed a different blouse to wear. I couldn't go see Billy in this old t-shirt. I took a light blue blouse with its cardigan and put them on. Those made me look decent enough. As I was combing through my messy hair Alice peered into the room.

"Come in Alice" I told her.

She walked in and sat by the edge of the bed, which she had graciously made earlier.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

I sighed before looking at her and putting the brush down.

" I don't know Alice. I feel like all of this is too much. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to drown in sorrow and then other times I feel like I can do this. I really don't know how I would've been today if it hadn't been for your support yesterday. Thank you."

"You welcome Bella. I just want you to know that I'll be here for you. Do you want me to come to the hospital with you? I understand if you would rather do this by yourself."

"Alice, I really would like you there. I don't know how I'm going to get through seeing Billy, and having you there will help me so much."

"Then say no more. I'll go get my purse and I'll meet you downstairs." She said as she walked over to the bedroom door.

"Alice?" I asked.

"Yes?" she replied as she turned her head around once she reached the door.

"Thank you for being such a good friend." I said.

"Nothing to thank me for. That's what friends are for. I'll see you in a bit, now comb that mess you have in your hair and put some lipstick on or something!"

I let a small laugh escape my lips and went back to combing my messy hair. Once it was all detangled I placed a hair clip on half of it and let in come down my shoulders. You couldn't even notice the redness around my eyes unless you looked very close, to which I was glad. I skipped the lip gloss and just left the room. Alice was in the living room with Charlie, he was wearing his uniform and seemed ready to go.

"Bella, I'll have to leave you girls in the hospital for a little bit. I have to go by the office for a while."

"I can take the car if you want me to Bella" said Alice.

"I'll only be gone for 20 minutes tops." Said Charlie.

"Then is OK, Alice, we'll just take a ride with Charlie and wait for him."

"Ok" said Alice. "Here's my cell phone number Charlie, so you can call us when you are leaving the station." She said as she handed him a piece of paper.

He gladly took it and put it in the inside pocket of his jacket.

"OK ladies, are you ready?" he asked a bit hesitantly.

"As ready as I'll ever be" I replied. I grabbed my purse and headed to the front door.

The drive to the hospital was longer that what expected. Maybe it was my nerves that were acting up or something but this drive seemed to take hours. I knew just a couple of minutes had passed in reality but by the time we made it to the hospital my hands were sweating and cold. I knew I was paler because of the way Alice looked at me when I got out of the cruiser. She wrapped her arms around me as Charlie escorted us inside. He moved through hallways I didn't remember and after taking an elevator we arrived to a waiting room. He told us to wait there.

I sat down with Alice right next to me.

"Bella, I don't know what you're thinking, but please try and get yourself together for what's coming, ok?" Alice pleaded with me.

I wasn't able to talk so I just nodded. I closed my eyes trying to get some inner strength to face what was coming my way. I even said a silent prayer asking God (for the first time in years) to help me through this. Once I finished my prayer I started feeling much calmer. I could breathe easily and the feeling of almost fainting was gone by now. It was then that Charlie came by and sat on the opposite side of me.

"Bella, Rachel and Rebecca want to speak to you before you see Billy. Is that OK?"

"It's fine dad. Where are they?" I asked.

"They're coming this way right now." He informed me.

I looked up to see the twins heading my way. The last time I saw them was in Jacob's funeral. I hadn't even had the strength to speak to them even then. Rachel had always been the one with the shorter hair and a freckle in her hand, which was the only way I was able to tell her apart from Rebecca. Both of them looked somber, like they had not slept in over a week. As soon as they reached to where we were sitting I stood up. I expected them to be angry at me, filled with resentment and maybe hating me for the way I had acted these past years. But to my surprise they received me with open arms, both of the hugging me at the same time.

We were overwhelmed by emotion and our tears combined into a song of sorrow. I could only hold them tighter. And they reciprocated the action as well. Once we were able to compose ourselves Rebecca was the first one to speak.

"Oh, Bella, it's been too long. We have missed you so much!" she said in between the remains of her sobs.

"I'm sorry." I replied as I wiped away my tears. "I know I should've acted differently. I just couldn't…"

"We understand" Said Rachel. "We've all had to find our way of handling it. So don't be sorry Bella. We know how much Jacob meant to you."

"Bella, I'm just glad you're here now." Said Rebecca. "Dad has been asking for you non-stop."

"I want to se him if that's ok" I told them.

"No problem" they both said. "Come with us."

I turned for a split second and gave both Charlie and Alice a reassuring look.

"I'll be here if you need me" said Alice.

"Thanks" I replied before turning around and following Rebecca and Rachel to their dad's hospital room….

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read and review. Let me know how I'm doing!se. I know Bella seems to cry a lot, but wouldn't you cry as much if you were suffering like her? Please enjoy. I know, it's sad, and the next couple of chapters will be a bit sad but then it will get better, I promise to get this chapter out. I'll be out of town for the rest of he week and don't know when I'll get the chance to write another chapter (hopefully by next week) so pleajhardA/N: I worked really


	14. Chapter 14 Day at the Hospital

**A/N: I've been working non-stop and I apologize for taking so long to post a new chapter. I know it's a short one, but it's an important one. I have almost finished the next chapter, just have to find the time to type it. So hopefully by tomorrow I'll have it posted. Please let me know what you think, all comments are greatly appreciated!**

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Ch.14

**Day at the hospital**

I could feel my heart beating faster as each step took me closer to Billy's room. Anxiety was overtaking me as my thoughts were clouded with worry and my emotions filled with sorrow and despair. I felt so guilty, guilty of abandoning everything I had known and loved. I had turned my back on all of those that had stood by me during the hardest time in my life. And now I felt like I was on my way to final judgment, that no matter all the penance I was willing to endure it would not compensate for the hurt I had caused.

"Bella, Rebecca and I want to let you know what to expect before you go in to see dad" said Rachel.

I turned away from my personal thoughts and focused on the reality I was facing. The twins had been escorting me over to the room where Billy was. I looked up to see Rachel. She looked so tired. Her beautiful features were clouded with sadness and resignation. I turned to see Rebecca and was met with the same expression. I remembered that the last time I saw them both they had the same expression in their faces.

"Dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer about six months ago" said Rebecca. "The doctors were very honest with us all and told us that his condition didn't have a cure so far. Because of other illnesses he experiences they had given him only three months to live. But dad's a fighter" she tried to continue talking but was overcome by emotion.

Rachel extended her hand to her sister and continued: "Ever since we found out about dad's diagnosis we've tried to make his time with us more valuable and comfortable for him. Rebecca even took him with her to Hawaii for a couple of weeks. But he insisted on coming back to Forks and we brought him back. For a couple of weeks now all he's been asking for is to see you."

"Please Bella, don't act surprised when you see him. That might make him feel worse. His appearance is a lot different from when you last saw him" said Rebecca.

"He sometimes says the weirdest things too" said Rachel. "So don't be startled if what he tells you doesn't make sense."

"We think that some of the medication he's been given is making him hallucinate" Said Rebecca. "He sometimes tells us that Jacob is in the room with him."

"We think he's ready to leave us soon" said Rachel. "He's been holding on, and we think it's because he's waiting for you. So please, just try to talk to him if only for a couple of minutes."

I could only nod. I was trying to save my strength and my speech to address Billy. The twins escorted me to a room at the end of the hallway. As I approached the door to the room I was taken aback by the sudden smell of freesias, lilacs and a hint of lavender.

I looked into the room. It was very bright, with windows in one of the walls. That was the only difference to all the other hospital rooms I had visited in my life. Cream-colored walls flanked a bed that stood right in the middle. Machines carrying the tune of incessant beeping surrounded the bed. As I took a step inside I could see a frail silhouette underneath the bed sheets.

Both Rebecca and Rachel were trying to encourage me to come further inside the room. In a split second I felt myself tense up and my survival instinct kick in. I wanted to flee the scene. As I turned away I felt an unexplained calm take hold of me. I took advantage of the situation to find some courage to walk in. I turned towards the room and stepped in, closer and closer to the bed.

Billy was a remnant of what he had been years ago. His illness had left him frail and pale. His noble face now looked scarred with pain. His long hair was now entirely gray and his countenance looked weak. I had to wipe away the tears as they rolled down my cheek.

"Dad" said Rachel. "There's someone here to see you."

Billy stirred in his bed and with his eyes stilled closed replied "I know sweetheart. We've been waiting for you to come arrive, Bella."

I stretched out my hand to him and held his hand before I said "Hi Billy."

"It's so nice to hear your voice" said Billy with a slight strain in his voice. He opened his eyes as a slight smile formed in his face.

I was about to say something back to him when he continued "Before you go on and start apologizing I need to tell you that there's nothing to forgive you for. You did nothing wrong."

I looked to his eyes and squeezed his hand a bit as I replied "I'm just so sorry Billy."

"Girls" said Billy addressing his daughters, "Could you leave Bella and I alone for a while? There're some things I need to tell her."

They both nodded in response and walked in unison out of the room.

"We'll be in the waiting room if you need us" said Rachel as they both stepped out the door.

"Now you sit down Bella" Said Billy.

I moved the chair that was next to the bed closer and took a seat.

"Bella, it's nice seeing you. Although you look like your hair could use a brush or two."

I couldn't help but laugh at what Billy said. He always found a way of making me laugh. Here he was in a hospital bed giving me a lecture about me appearance.

"It's been too long" he continued to say. "But I'm glad you came."

"Billy, I'm glad too." I replied. I saw that his eyes were closing and that he was trying to fight away a yawn so I said: "Now Billy, why don't you rest up a bit. I'll be here when you wake up." I moved to stroke his hair trying to assure him of my words.

He gave me a weak smiled before saying: "I can stay up for a bit longer. I have to tell you something first."

"OK" I said.

"There's something you need to do for both Jacob and I" he said. "You have to let go, we won't be able to move on until you do." A sudden fit of coughing took over him.

"Take it easy" I said. I got up and went over to the bedside table and grabbed a cup. I filled it with some water and grabbed a straw. I brought it over to him and encouraged him to take a couple of sips. As he drank I continued to say: "I'm back to be with you and with Charlie for as long as possible. Now please rest up a bit. We can talk later."

I placed the cup down at the table and continued to stroke Billy's hair. This helped him calm down and he finally closed his eyes.

When I was sure he had fallen asleep I sat down by the chair next to his bed and thought about what he had said. I wasn't sure how he knew, but he had found out my dark secret. I hadn't let go. I was still trying to hold on to Jacob. I knew he was no longer here physically, but I held to every emotion and memory of him that I had. That's how I had survived for so long. I didn't know if I was ready to move on. Suddenly, the same smell of flowers that I had experienced in the hallway came back again. It only lasted for a minute or two. But somehow the smell gave me hope, that if I wanted to I would be able to move on.

I stayed in Billy's room for an hour until Rachel showed up.

"Is everything OK?" she asked.

"Yes" I said. "He's been sleeping for an hour."

"He won't wake up until later in the evening" Rachel told me. "He always falls asleep around this time. When he wakes up the nurses give him some medications and some liquids."

"Oh" I said. "I was hoping to talk to him for a bit longer."

"Don't worry Bella" Rachel said. "You can come tomorrow morning then. You should go home and rest."

"I can stay if you need me to" I told her. "I really don't mind."

"I know" Rachel replied. "Why don't you go home today and then tomorrow you can come early in the morning and take a shift. We could use the break."

"That sounds like a plan. Should I be here at seven?" I asked.

"Yes, seven is a good time. You'll be here for his breakfast. He's always chatty after that."

"I'll be here first thing in the morning then." I told her.

"See you tomorrow" said Rachel. I got up and moved towards the door before I heard Rachel call my name.

"Yes?" I asked her.

"We're glad you're back" said Rachel. "We've missed having our little sister with us."

"I've missed you too" I replied. And with those words I left the room…


	15. Chapter 15 Lasagna and Apple Pie

**A/N: Thank you 71star for last chapter's review! I apologize for taking longer than promised on posting this chapter, but computer bipolarism had a lot to do with it. Please keep reviewing and keeping me motivated to write more.**

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Ch.15 ****Lasagna and Apple Pie**

Charlie managed to drive us back before he had to leave again for the station. I wanted to stay at the house but Alice refused to hear about it.

"Let's just go out for lunch" she said. "There's nothing in the pantry to eat anyway."

She had a point. Once she saw that she had won the simple argument she moved over to the front door and held it open for me to walk through. We drove to the local dinner and placed our orders. As we waited for our food to arrive Alice stated to talk.

"So how are you holding up?" she asked.

"I'm fine" I replied. "It wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. I somehow thought they would be so made at me, and kept waiting for one of them to tell me so, but all I heard was how happy they are all of having me back."

They love you Bella" Alice said. "I'm sure they all understand why you had to leave and are just glad to have you back home."

The food arrived and we started to eat. Conversation was light afterwards. Once we finished I asked Alice to drive up to the grocery store so that we could get groceries for the house. Alice offered to get some things as well, and although I tried to explain that it wasn't necessary and that I would take care of it she wouldn't hear about it, took a cart and decided to ignore me and fill it with everything I looked at but didn't choose myself. By the time we made it to the checkout line I had half a cart of things while Alice had a cart full of groceries.

"Are you trying to feed an army?" I asked her as a little smirk formed on my face.

"Glad to see you're finally getting a sense of humor." Alice replied.

We both laughed and headed out the store with a cart and a half full of grocery bags.

"Um, Alice?" I asked.

"Yes Bella?" she replied.

"Where are we going to put all of these bags? The car is not that big."

"Well whatever fits we'll put in the trunk and the rest we'll have to put on top of you." Alice replied with a laugh.

"Funny, very funny" I said.

Somehow we managed to fit most of the grocery bags in the trunk but some inevitably ended on my lap as well. It took us quite a while to organize the groceries in the pantry and decide what to make for dinner. Alice even offered to cook, but she didn't seem all that comfortable handling the stove and I figured that meant she wasn't that good around the kitchen, so I managed to convince her to take care of the salad and I would make my dad's favorite: lasagna.

After a while all the ingredients for the lasagna were ready and I put it together in no time. It was still too early to put it in the oven, so I placed some foil on top and left it on top of the stove to cook later. Alice wanted to see more of the town so we decided to take a walk around the neighborhood. I was glad we were the same shoe size, because I had to lend her a pair of flats since her stiletto boots although very fashionable were not meant for walking.

"This town is so nice!" said Alice as we walked down the street.

"Nice if you like it gray all the time" I replied. "And you rather be bored for the rest of your life."

"Now, Bella. I'm pretty sure it isn't as bad as you're making it sound."

"No, I guess it isn't. At least it wasn't when Jacob as around" I said. "He always managed to get us to do something interesting."

I went on to tell Alice all about the time the guys from la Push decided to go cliff diving. I convinced some of my friends and classmates to join us. But only two girls were brave enough to try the jump: Angela and me. I still remember the rush I felt while falling and how once I reached the water the safe arms of Jacob were waiting for me. I kept telling Alice all about that day while we walked towards the local bakery. I wanted to get something special for dessert and Alice and her sweet tooth were all up for it. I looked at the display and once I saw the apple pie sitting there it was decided. As we walked outside I hear a familiar voice call out my name.

"Good afternoon Bella!" said Angela. "Now this is unbelievable! I get to see you twice in a day?"

I turned over to face the voice that had called me and was greeted with a beautiful sight. There, walking down the sidewalk was my friend, her husband and their little bundle of joy.

"Angela! Ben!" I exclaimed. Soon I felt two arms around me.

"Bella! It's so nice to see you!" said Ben as he let me go from his hold.

"It's nice seeing you too" I said. "And this must be your little boy." I knelt to get a closer look. "He's adorable! Looks just like his dad."

"Yep." Said Ben. "That's our little Benjamin Jacob."

I was slightly take aback by the mention of Jacob's name. The slight tap on my shoulder got me back to the present.

"Oh, I can't believe I forgot my manners" I said. "Ben, Angela, this is my dear friend Alice Cullen."

"Nice to meet you Alice" both of them said.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too." Alice replied. "Especially after I've been hearing such great stories about you guys."

"Really?" replied Ben. "And what sort of stories might those be?"

"Oh, just remembering our adventures from back in High School." I said.

That made both Angela and Ben laugh. Angela asked if we could join them for a cup of coffee or tea to which both Alice and I agreed. We spent a couple of hours reminiscing about the old days and they shared with Alice and me the story of how they ended back in Forks married. I stole a quick glance to the clock in the bakery's wall when I realized it was getting a bit late.

"Um, I'm sorry guys," I said. "But I think is time for Alice and I to get back. I have to finish dinner. You know how dad gets when he's hungry."

"How could we forget" said Ben. "That bad mood spreads like fire."

"Ben!" said Angela as she elbowed him. "Don't pay attention Bella. He's just joking. But we gotta go as well. Little Benji here is long overdue for his nap."

"It's been great seeing you guys." I said.

"It's been a pleasure meeting you" said Alice.

"Same here" replied Ben.

"We hope we get to see you again Bella" said Angela as she moved towards the door with Benji in his stroller.

"I hope so too" I said.

"Don't be a stranger. Stop by anytime" said Ben. "And you are welcome to come as well Alice."

We a couple of hugs and short goodbyes we parted our separate ways.

We managed to make it back with enough time to put the lasagna in the oven. Alice excused herself and went upstairs to take a shower. I was setting up the table when Charlie walked in.

"Hello!" he said from the door. "I hope that what I'm smelling is not my imagination playing tricks on me."

"Hi dad" I replied. "It's not your imagination. It's your favorite."

"It's been ages since I had some good old homemade lasagna." He said as he approached the kitchen.

"Dad, it seems it's been ages since you ate anything homemade."

"Watch it kid" he replied. "That kind of talk can get you in serious trouble."

"What?" I said. "You're going to report me to the sheriff or something?"

We both laughed.

"It's nice seeing you laugh sweetheart" he said as he gave me a quick peck on the forehead. "I thought that I would never hear that laugh again. I was actually a bit worried, especially after what you went through today. I thought you might be a bit shaken up."

"I thought I would be too. But somehow I'm holding up ok" I said. "Hey you'll never guess who I saw."

"Who?" he asked.

"I saw Angela, Ben and their baby this afternoon."

"Good!" Charlie replied. "Angela stops by the station to ask about you almost every week. I'm glad you got a chance to spend some time with them. Hey, where's Alice?"

"Oh, she's upstairs taking a shower." I answered. "She should be coming down soon"

"Good!" he said as he sat by the dinner table. "I'm starving and I don't think I can wait up much longer to dig in."

"So how was your day?" I asked trying to keep him preoccupied.

"Oh, you know same old same old. A missing cat here, a stolen wallet there, nothing special."

"Well, at least nothing serious happened." I said.

"Yeah, that's always a good thing" he replied as he placed his napkin around his collar. "I found out that Sam and Emily arrived this afternoon."

"That's good" I replied. "Sam's so close to Billy. I'm glad he and Emily came to see him."

"I got the call when I was at the station. Sam asked about you and wanted to know if it was ok for both to stop by later this evening."

"I hope you told him it was ok" I said.

"I'm glad you said that because that's exactly what I told him."

Alice walked down the steps as we were talking and took a seat at the small dinner table.

"Guess who's coming later tonight?" I told her.

"Who?" she replied. "Wait, let me think." She closed her eyes for a second or two and then suddenly opened them before answering: "Sam and Emily will be eating pie with us later tonight."

"How can you know?" said Charlie very interested.

"I have a sixth sense" Alice replied rather seriously. "I can always tell what's going to happen. But it also helps that I overheard the two of you talking."

Charlie's laugh filled the room. It was so contagious that for the next couple of minutes all we did was laugh with him. Once we all managed to control ourselves we went ahead and ate dinner. I had to admit that sitting and having dinner with my father and my best friend was rather nice. We were so stuffed with all we ate that Alice's prediction of having pie with Sam and Emily was coming true, we couldn't possibly eat a piece any time soon.

Charlie insisted on taking care of the dishes and Alice encouraged me to go and take a shower. She was going to take the chance and call her mom. I headed upstairs and followed her orders. I always felt that a shower could take anything away, something about the sound of water falling down and the feel or warm water running down my back was refreshing and soothing at the same time.

I decided that since we were expecting guests I should look semi-decent. So I put on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. I changed gears and went on to work on brushing my hair which was a mess. For some reason while I was brushing I remembered that smell from Billy's hospital room. The combination of lilacs and freesias reminded me of the bouquet of flowers Jacob had gotten me before the accident. He had walked in one day with his hands behind his back, and it took some persuasion from my part and even some wrestling to have him reveal what he was hiding. There in his hands he had a small bunch of wildflowers he had gotten on his way here from the side of the road. He had stopped by the flower shop to get some pink ribbon to tie them together.

I looked over to the edge of the mirror in my room and there, almost hiding, was the ribbon still holding a dried lilac stem. I gently touched it with my hand. I didn't feel as I normally did whenever I remembered anything about Jacob. I felt different. It seemed that I was now taking moments like this and seeing them for hat they really were: beautiful memories of the past and not have them turn into torturing reminders of what I had lost. A small smile drew on my lips as I let go of the flower and went back to the task at hand. I decided that my hair was looking as decent as it possibly could so without further wait I made my way downstairs.

As I approached the bottom of the steps I hear a couple of familiar voices coming out from the living room and I headed towards them. I could see the familiar faces of both Sam and Emily by the couch. A smiled formed on my face as I stepped closer to greet the guests. Emily got up and gave me a quick hug as Sam followed her example.

"Oh Bella, we're so glad to see you!" exclaimed Emily. "We were so worried about you when we heard!"

"It's ok Emily." I said. "I'm fine. Alice and dad have been doing a great job taking care of me."

"We wanted to come sooner, but Sam had to get his leave authorized and you know how long everything takes in the university" said Emily.

"I'm just glad you guys made" I said as I moved over from Emily's hold to Sam's.

"I've missed you kiddo." Sam said as he stretched his arms over me. "It's not the same without you."

"You better be taking good care of the lab. " I told him. "It better be as nice as I left it when I get back."

Sam smiled as he let go of Bella. "I'm glad you said that" he said in a whisper. "That actually answers my first question. I was worried you might quit on me."

"I would never dream of such a thing!" I replied. "But I might need to extend my vacation for a bit longer."

"I know" he said. "You take as long as you need."

We joined the rest by the living room and enjoyed the time while everyone caught up. Emily and Sam were ecstatic to have Alice in Forks as well. They explained to Alice that it had been a year at least since their last visit to Forks.

They always kept in communication with the people back home, unlike me, and called Charlie regularly to assure him that I was doing ok back in NY.

"We plan on visiting Billy tomorrow" said Emily. She placed the cup of tea I had handed her down on the coffee table.

"I'll be there first thing in the morning" I told her. I placed my plate of pie leftovers by the coffee table as well. While the conversation had been kept between Alice and Sam I had excused myself and gotten some tea on the stove and plates and forks for everyone. Charlie had been eyeing the apple pie for a while before I had brought it in to the living room.

"I'll be relieving the twins for a while."

"That's good" said Sam. "I'm sure they must be exhausted.

"They sure are" commented Charlie. "They haven't left that hospital since Billy was admitted. I help every now and again but they've refused to go home to sleep."

The mood turned a bit somber. We all kept to our thoughts for a couple of minutes until Sam broke off the silence.

"So Alice," said Sam. "What do you think of Forks so far?"

"I think it's adorable!" replied Alice. "I haven't been able to go to all the places Charlie has mentioned but I'm pretty sure that when mom and dad get here we'll be able to find the time. I bet they are just going to love it."

"Did you say that Esme and Carlisle are coming?" asked Emily.

"I forgot to tell you!" replied Alice. "The whole clan arrives tomorrow afternoon. We'll be staying at Port Angeles for a couple of days but visiting here as often as Charlie and Bella will have us."

"That's great news!" said Sam. "I can't believe Carlisle didn't say anything yesterday when we spoke. It's been so long since I've seen the whole family. I bet he is just going to love my old neighborhood."

"And Esme will love the antique stores around the area" commented Emily.

With this new line of conversation everyone's moods lit up. Plan were suddenly made for the Cullen's to come by Forks and take the scenes it offered. Charlie offered a tour of the station and the "historical monuments" as he called them- really, the library and the old high school would not be considered historical monuments by anyone but him- and Sam mentioned all of us going to La Push.

I kept quiet most of the time, although I was glad to have my friends and family close by to offer support, I had other things plaguing my mind as well. Those around me seemed to understand I needed to be left to my thoughts and continued the conversation without making me join them or feeling uncomfortable about it. After a short while longer Sam's yawns became a signal for Emily to excuse them for the evening. After some goodbye hugs they left.

"That was nice of them to stop by" said Charlie.

"Yes it was" I said. "I'm glad Sam is going to see Billy tomorrow. They've always been so close." I moved over to the kitchen to take care of the dishes dirtied by our dessert session.

"I'm glad he came too" said Charlie. "I think I'm going to call it a night."

"Ok, dad" I said. "Have a good night."

"Good night Bella" Charlie said as he stepped closer and gave me a kiss in the forehead. "And don't let the bedbugs bite."

"Good night to you too Alice" he said as he stepped closer to the stairs and started going up.

"Good night Charlie!" Alice answered. She handed me the last of the dishes before taking a seat on the barstool. "How are you holding up?"

I knew that Alice was always straight to the point unless I needed the space. I appreciated that about her.

"I'm ok" I said. "I think I'm getting better at managing it."

"Good" said Alice. "What's the plan for tomorrow?"

"I'm going to the hospital for the morning and then we have dinner with your family." I said.

"Do you think we could go outside the hospital for lunch?" Alice asked. "Their food is not that good. And I think the break away from the hospital will be good, even if it's for a while."

"OK." I told her.

"Bella, can I ask you something?" said Alice.

"Sure Alice, anything." I replied.

"Are you OK with the whole Cullen clan coming here?"

"Sure" I said. "Alice, I know they just want to show their support and this is a way of doing it I guess."

"My family can go overboard every now and again."

"I had not noticed at all" I replied with a little smirk on my face.

"Hey! Was that a sarcastic remark from Ms. Swan?" Alice said while smiling at me and throwing a dish towel my way.

"Maybe" I said as I ducked away from the towel's path. "OK, I think the dishes are done and we should go to bed."

"I have to call mom first, so I'll see you in the morning" said Alice.

"Don't go to bed too late" I said. "You're looking like you need the rest."

"Hey! Two sarcastic remarks in a row, I'm hurt!"

"Just trying to be honest here" I said as I turned over to the stairs.

Alice was right behind me and a yawn escaped her. "Maybe you're a bit right about me needing to rest. I'll keep it short with mom."

"Then good night Alice" I said.

"Good night Bella" she replied. As we reached the top I turned off the lights and headed to my room as my friend went to hers…


	16. Chapter 16 Hospital Visit 2

**A/N: Working really hard to have some more chapters for you guys. I already have 2 more chapters written I just have to find the time to sit down and type them. Hope you enjoy and please keep the reviews coming!!!!**

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**Ch.16: Hospital Visit #2**

I didn't have any nightmares to keep me awake so when I got out of bed I felt like I had gotten a decent amount of sleep. It was still pretty dark outside, so I made my way to the bathroom as quietly as possible. Once I got ready for the day I went back to the room and made the bed. I also took some clothes and put them away, I would have to get some laundry done soon. I went over to the mirror and started working on my hair which I managed to get into a decent-looking ponytail. The khakis and blue sweater I was wearing were comfortable but they also looked nice. Last thing I needed was to have Billy telling me I looked horrible again.

I headed downstairs as quietly as possible and prepared coffee and tea for everyone. I decided to just go right ahead and make breakfast as well. As I was getting the toast out of the toaster both Charlie and Alice had managed to make it down, although looking as extreme opposites. Charlie was already donning his uniform and grabbing a cup of coffee looked as ready as ever for another fun-filled day at the station. Alice, on the other hand, looked horrible. Still in her pajamas, with a bathrobe on top and with her hair firing at all directions, she looked like she was still asleep. The fact that one of her eyes was still closed didn't help her cause either. I handed her a cup of coffee, in hopes of getting her to join the land of the living.

"Thanks" she managed to say in between yawns.

"Your welcome" I replied. "It seems like you're going to need an IV of coffee today."

"Funny Bella, very funny" Alice replied. "I had a long night. Called Jasper and went to bed late, very, very late."

"I can see" I answered back. "Maybe you should stay and rest. You can come by the hospital later and we'll go to lunch as planned."

"Really?" she asked. "You wouldn't mind?"

"Of course not!" I replied. "Just stay and rest. I'm sure dad won't mind stopping by the hospital on his way to the station. I'll leave the spare keys for you in the table, ok?"

"Ok" she replied.

I turned to face Charlie which was so preoccupied attacking his eggs that had missed the entire conversation.

"Dad?" I said. "Can you drop me off at the hospital? Alice needs to sleep for a bit longer."

"Sure thing" he said in between mouthfuls.

Alice excused herself and headed back to bed. I took her plate and placed it inside the microwave for her to eat later. I finished with my breakfast and with Charlie's help cleaned the kitchen in no time. As he grabbed his jacked we headed out the door.

I waved goodbye to my dad as he drove off the hospital's parking lot and made my way towards Billy's room. I stepped out of the elevator and walked towards the waiting area where I saw Rebecca slumped over a couple of chairs and in deep sleep.

I approached her and gently tapped her shoulder: "Good morning Rebecca."

She was a bit startled but as soon as she recognized that it was me she relaxed and gave me a smile.

"Good morning Bella" she said as she straightened up.

"I came to take my shift" I said. "Rachel I could come in early morning and stay with Billy so you two could go home for a bit and take a break."

"I know" she said. "She told me yesterday. Thanks for doing this."

"Nothing to thank me for. That's what I came to do."

"We should be back in a couple of hours" Rebecca said as she got up from her seat.

"No problem" I replied. "You can take as long as you like. Can I go see him now?"

"Yes, Rachel's in there with him. Just let her know that I'm in the parking lot getting the car and will meet her at the entrance, OK?"

"I'll do that. See you later." I said as I gave her a hug.

"See you later Bella."

I walked over to Billy's room and told Rachel what Rebecca has said. She nodded and grabbed her things. She moved closer to her dad and gave him a kiss on the forehead and said: "Dad, Becca and I are going home for a little while to rest and take a shower. Bella's going to be with you in the meantime. Be good."

"I'm always good." Billy replied. "And take as long as you want with that shower, you two are starting to stink a little."

"Dad!" Rachel replied. I couldn't hold back the laugh that was caught in my throat and Rachel didn't have a choice but to join in.

"He's impossible sometimes" she said.

"Good morning Bella" continued Billy. "Nice to see you're looking decent this morning."

I moved closer to Billy and gave him a kiss on the forehead: "Good morning to you Billy. I got dressed up for you actually. I wanted to look decent."

"Well, isn't that nice. At least I have someone that is concerned with giving me something nice to look at."

"Dad!" replied Rachel.

"What?" he answered back as a smiled formed in the edges of his mouth. "Is not like you or your sister has been looking your best lately. Now go and take a shower, tell your sister to do the same and leave Bella and I alone."

"You're impossible sometimes." She told him as she stepped in and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you both in a few hours."

"Take your time" I replied. "Billy and I will be right here when you get back."

I moved the chair closer to the bed as Rachel headed out the door. As I took a seat Billy shifted somewhat to face my way.

"Now Bella, weren't we in a middle of a conversation yesterday?" he asked.

"Well, kind of" I answered hesitantly. Billy had always been a straight-shooter, tell-it-like-it-is type of person. It seemed that his little stint in the hospital and having a terminal illness made him even more blatantly honest.

"You were giving me some advice" I finished.

"Advice, hah?" he said. "Is that what you're going to call it?" He sighed. "So be it." He moved his right hand in a gesture for me to come closer which I immediately did.

"Bella, I don't have much time left. I want to be honest to you about it. The girls won't even pay attention to me when I try to tell them but I know you, I know you trust that I'm telling you the truth. So let me tell you a little story."

For the next hour or so I sat down by him and listened as Billy recounted some of the memories from his past life. He told me about the feelings he experienced when he lost his wife so many years ago. About being all alone and having to raise 3 children, one of them an infant, after the accident that had taken his wife had left him paralyzed from the waist down. How even though he had bad days, the good days outweighed them. He went on to recall how he had felt walking his two daughters down the aisle and seeing Jacob graduate from High School. He also talked about how proud and happy he had been when Jacob told him about our engagement.

"When I lost my wife I thought everything had ended for me" he said. "I felt the physical pain of the accident and also the emotional pain of loosing her. I just felt empty, like I had lost the reason for my heart to beat had left. I even cried to God asking him why it had been her instead of me" he said holding back the tears. "I think I made it through rehab and that first year just for the kids."

I simply listened, every feeling he described I had felt. Every mood, every thought, it was as if he was describing my life for the past two years. How he became a "functioning zombie" to deal with the daily chores and tasks was exactly how I lived my life. It was as if in his description I only saw myself.

"And then one day I woke up and felt better. I actually felt something besides pain. I decided that it was ok for me to feel that way. Each day got better, with me realizing that it was fine to live and enjoy the life I had been given. Ever since then that's what I've done, Bella. Even after loosing my dear Jacob, even then I managed to go on living. That's what he would have wanted me to do."

He grabbed my hand firmly in his before he continued: "That's what he wants you to do. He wants you to have a happy and full life. That's why you have to let go of the pain."

Tears filled my eyes and strolled down my cheeks. I couldn't hide my true self from Billy. He had lived through so much and knew too well what I was living through. He didn't press me anymore, he just help my hand as I kept crying.

I tried to talk but the words just escaped me. I knew I was grieving; going through the emotions that I had run away from and after so much time had finally caught up with me.

Billy stroked my hair and handed me a tissue to dry away my tears. I was trying my hardest to control myself but I just couldn't. I didn't have the strength. And then out of nowhere that smell of lilacs and freesias came back. I felt warm inside and little by little the tears stopped.

"Now wasn't that nice of him?" asked Billy. "Thanks Jake."

"What?!?" I asked Billy. "You smelled that too?"

"Of course!" Billy replied. "That's what I've been trying to tell you. I don't have much time left in this life. Because I've accepted that fact I can feel and see things others can't. I've been able to feel whenever Jacob is in the room. He has been so worried about you that he has not been able to move on. He won't go until you let him. And please, Bella, do it soon. I want to be with him when I leave as well."

"Billy, I don't understand…" I said.

"Don't worry Bella, you will soon enough." He replied. "Now tell me, how has Sam been treating you?"

And with an ease that only Billy possesses we managed to shift the conversation over to the boring life I had lived ever since I left Forks. I could tell that some aspects of it made Billy sad, but once I told him about Sam and how he forced the vacation on me his eyes lit up. I went on to tell him about the Cullen's and how they took me in.

"They seem to be a wonderful family" said Billy.

"Yes they are" I replied. "They've just taken me in as if I was part of their family all along."

"Bella" said Billy. "Sometimes it amazes me hoe much you can underestimate just how wonderful you truly are. How could they not fall in love with someone like you? They would be crazy if they wouldn't!"

"I don't know Billy. It's just that…"

"That you feel that if you let someone in you would be betraying Jacob?"

"Yes" I said with all honesty.

"That's not true and you know it deep down. All he ever wanted was for you to be happy. And Bella, don't look down. I'm telling you the truth. He wants you to move on, to be happy, to love others and to let them love you too."

I was about to say something when a knock on the door interrupted the conversation.

"May we come in?" asked Sam with Emily by his side.

"Of course!" said Billy. "Come right in my boy!"

After some hellos I excused myself and left the room. I wanted to give them the privacy they deserved and I needed some alone time to think. I made my way to the ladies' bathroom in that floor.

I went into one of the stalls and just let all the tears of frustration roll down. Everything Billy said replayed in my mind once more. It just cut through me like a knife. I felt completely exposed; everything that I had kept guarded had been brought out to the light by the words Billy had spoken.

How could I possibly let go? Was that even possible? Billy kept saying it was and the sincerity in his eyes told me he believed I was capable of honoring his son while still moving on. I just didn't see it.

Yes, I had to admit that in the past week I had been more open to the possibility, and had even started to let others see the real me. They even offered me the support I needed right now, which helped. I didn't have to rely on my strength alone to do this. But somehow the idea of completely letting go was unfathomable.

By letting go I would be renouncing what had been essentially me, what had become familiar and comfortable. I just didn't know if when it was over and done with there would be enough of me left.

I just sighed, walked out of the stall, washed my faced and decided that at least for now there was no point in crying myself away in the bathroom. I was here to spend time with Billy and that's what I should be doing instead of hiding in the bathroom like a coward.

I headed back to Billy's room and when I walked in found Billy sleeping and Sam sitting on the chair next to him.

"He just fell asleep" Sam informed me. "He was very tired all of a sudden. Emily went to look for you."

"I was in the bathroom" I said.

"Billy's not doing very well" Sam said. He wasn't telling me, it was more of stating a fact to himself, which he often did. I just moved closer to him and placed my hand on his shoulder. " I don't know how he's been able to hold on for so long. He sure is a fighter."

"He's always been a fighter" I said in response.

Sam looked up to me and I could see tears forming in his eyes. He squeezed my hand with his and went back to looking at Billy. Emily entered the room soon afterwards and for a while all we did was just stand there and look at our dear old friend sleep.

"Sam, we promised the Clearwater's we would stop by their house for lunch" said Emily. "We can come back later in the afternoon. I spoke with Rachel on the phone and she said that you could stay with him for the night if you liked."

Sam nodded and got up from the chair and moved closer to Billy. He placed a strand of hair behind Billy's ear and leaned forward to place a kiss on his forehead. He then moved over to me and without speaking a word gave me a hug before leaving the room.

"I'm sorry Bella" said Emily. "I have to go after Sam. I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning."

"I'll be here first thing in the morning" I told her giving her a quick hug. "Now go, find him."

Emily stepped out of the room and went in search of Sam. I moved towards the chair and took a seat. From this point of view I could see how the lines in Billy's face were more pronounced and how his breathing had become a bit labored.

"Oh Billy" I said as I gently squeezed his hand. "Please don't leave us yet. I'm not ready."

I leaned over and rested my head on the bed's railing. I don't know how much time passed with me in this position but I was startled by a slight tap on my shoulder.

"Bella" said Rebecca. "We just arrived."

I got up from the chair.

"I think I saw your friend, Alice, in the waiting area. It's past noon so you should go get something to eat. I bet you're starving."

As if on cue my stomach started growling.

"Oh," I said. "I hadn't realized it was that late."

"Yeah, we took a bit longer than expected" she replied with an apologetic tone.

"Oh no! I don't mean it like that" I assured her. "I meant to say that time just flew by."

"Ok. Then why don't you come back in the morning and do it all over again. Dad will be pretty much out of it until the evening and Sam and Emily offered to be here then. Go home and rest. I don't know how long we are going to be at this and I don't want anyone to collapse in the hospital out of exhaustion."

Rebecca had always been extremely practical and hard-headed. I knew that even if I attempted to convince her that she herself was suffering from exhaustion right now she would find a way of forcing me to go home. I just nodded, gave her a hug and stepped out of the room.


	17. Chapter 17 Lunch with Alice

**A/N: Please review, I know is short but it's still sweet. **

**I'm working really hard to have more chapters for you guys. And I'm also working on another story that I'll be posting soon, which I'm really excited about!!!!! Now, enjoy!**

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Ch. 17

**Lunch with Alice**

When I got back to the waiting room area I saw Alice and Rachel speaking.

"He's sleeping" I informed them.

"I guess that means the usual" said Rachel. "He'll probably be knocked out until later tonight."

"Yeah, that's what Rebecca said too."

"Then we'll see you in the morning then?"

"Yes, I'll be here around the same time if that's OK."

"That works perfectly" said Rachel. "We'll be waiting!" Turning to Alice: "Nice to see you again Alice." And with that she said her goodbyes and headed towards her father's room.

Alice stepped closer and placed her arm over my shoulder.

"How are you holding up?" she asked with a slight hint of worry in her tone.

"Honestly" I said, "not so good. I need dome fresh air right now."

"No need to say more. Let's go." Without further delays Alice escorted me to the outside of the hospital. We walked pass the parking lot towards a small park down the street.

I just walked and took in the crisp and fresh air while Alice waited for me on a bench nearby. Just having her a few feet away was all the support I needed to get me back to a more calm and collected state.

Once I felt a bit better and Alice eased up on her worry, we headed back to the parking lot and towards the car. Alice drove around for some minutes looking for a decent place to eat, which I had tried to explain would be an impossible task to achieve here in Forks, but she didn't listen and kept driving until her growling stomach took over and made her stop on the first decent place she saw.

We managed to be seated by the window and the view wasn't half bad. It overlooked the forest so it was actually quite nice. The waitress gave us each a couple of minutes to look over the menus and brought us some water. When we were ready she took the orders in and left to get them prepared.

Alice took the chance to ask: "Are you doing any better now?"

"A little" I said. "The walk helped a bit."

"I'm glad. To be honest, you were looking rather pale back in the hospital. Maybe you should get some tea or something." She didn't even wait for me to answer when she called the waitress over and asked her for a cup of tea.

Once the waitress came back with the tea I followed my friend's suggestion and took a couple of sips. The hot drink really helps to soothe my nerves. Once I put it down I was feeling much better.

"I think once I eat something I'll feel better." I told Alice.

"I hope so. I was hoping we could go do something just the two of us. It could help get your mind off things. I don't have to pick up my family for a couple of hours so that gives us time.

"What did you have in mind?" I asked.

"Well, I was going to suggest retail therapy but that would be more useful on me than you. I still remember your face the day we went to the boutique. So how about going to that bookstore you had mentioned when we were driving to Forks?

"The one in Port Angeles?" I said.

"Why not?" she replied. The food arrived and she waited until we were settled and ready to eat before continuing: "We have time, and it would be good for me to drive to Port Angeles with someone who's been there before and knows the road."

"I guess" I said.

"Then it's settled" said Alice with a smile on her face. "I'll have you back in time for you to have a couple of hours for yourself and get ready for tonight's dinner. This is going to be fun!"

I didn't know how hungry I was until the first bite hit my mouth. As soon as the warmth of the food traveled down my body I noticed how much I really needed this meal. Once we finished I insisted on paying the tab, which Alice had refused to accept, but when I said that I wouldn't go to Port Angeles if she kept fussing about it then she let me pay.

After a couple of side-street turns we made our way unto the 101 which would take us to Port Angeles. The drive wasn't bad. Alice took the time to keep me entertained. She told me some stories of her own. The stories were mainly about things her and jasper had done. I could see how much she loved him just by the look on her eyes every time she mentioned his name. I wasn't resentful or anything. I was actually happy to have the stories of her and Jasper keep my mind occupied and away from Billy.

Next thing I knew we had driven past the airport and heading towards downtown Port Angeles. I gave her instructions to the street we were looking for and in no time were parking the car. The town hadn't changed that much, some new stores here and there but essentially everything was pretty much the same. For a moment I got worried that the old bookstore I had spent hours in and loved so much had closed down, but as soon as we got to the corner I saw it and all the anxiety was a thing of the past.

"It's still here!" I said to Alice who I had been dragging by the hand.

"Good, then you can let me go and we can walk in and enjoy it." She said.

The bookstore was nothing special in comparison to the ones I had seen in NY. But the memories I had of this place were what made it so special. It was in this store that I purchased my first copy of Pride and Prejudice. I made my way through the very cramped aisled down to the fiction section.

"I'm going to see if I can find a book for mom about architecture or something" Alice said. "Come find me if you need anything, ok?"

"Sure thing" I said. I was in an almost trance and Alice knew better than to stay in my way. She walked away as I got to my favorite section of the whole store. They kept a small but decent selection of early editions of some of the greatest classics ever. I had paperback copies of most of these books that I worn down through the years, but there was something that I always found particularly beautiful about these old books. There's a particular charm in old books, it is as if the book itself has a history of its own. I always found that the smell of old paper and leather was a beautiful combination. I could spend hours imagining the stories behind all the hands that have passed the pages of each of these books. I was literally lost in my world of books when Alice interrupted.

"Hey" she said kneeling beside me. "What is it you have there?"

"Oh this?" I replied. "Is nothing. I was looking at this old copy of Jane Eyre. The binding on it is simply gorgeous!"

Alice laughed at me which made me give her somewhat a puzzled look.

"You get as excited with old books as I get with new clothes!" she said.

We both laughed then.

"Are you going to get it?" Alice asked.

"Oh no, it's too expensive. This book is over one thousand dollars and it's not even a first edition. Those go for over 25 thousand! I'm just admiring it." I said as placed it back in the plastic box it had been in.

"Did you find anything for Esme?" I asked Alice.

"Yeah, there was this really cute book about West Coast Architecture that I think she's going to love" replied Alice. We made it over to the counter and Alice paid for her purchase before stepping outside.

We walked for a little bit before heading to the nearest Starbucks. It was a bit chilly outside, even if we are technically in summer weather. So we each ordered a cup of hot cocoa and sat on the comfy couch they had.

"This is nice" I said.

"I'm glad you like it" replied Alice.

"Thanks Alice. This was a very good idea. I really needed the distraction."

"Anytime my friend, anytime."

We sat for a while and talked about the books back in the store when Alice just glances over to her designer watch.

"I think we should head back" said Alice. I nodded and followed her outside. Once we made it back to the car I told Alice about the first time I went to that bookstore. My mom had taken me when I was really little and let me get a book. I chose The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss. I thought the Cat looked funny with his big hat.

"You had never mentioned your mom before" said Alice.

"I don't like to talk about her" I said. "We don't have the best relationship."

"I see" said Alice.

"It's not like with me and Charlie" I said. "She left us when I was ten and ever since I just have not been willing to give her the time of day to tell you the truth." I really couldn't believe that I was so honest with Alice; she would think I was a horrible person for saying such mean things about my own mother.

"Everyone has issues they need to deal with. And it comes in its due time. Don't worry; eventually you two will work it out."

"Thanks for understanding and not judging me Alice."

"Hey, I'm here to listen, not to judge. I'm sure there will be a time for me to do that, especially if it has to do with you and clothes." We both laughed at this. The conversation the rest of the way was kept pretty light, with Alice giving me advice of the best colors for my skin tone and what she thought would look best on me.

"Definitely a charcoal trench coat. That would look amazing on you!" she said as we parked on the driveway.

"Well, here we are" she continued. "I guess I'll see you and your dad at the restaurant tonight?"

"Don't you need to get your things first?" I asked her.

"Oh, I packed before picking you up at the hospital. Here" she said as she handed over the spare key. "Thanks for letting me sleep in, I really needed it."

"Don't sweat it" I said as I got out the car. "I'll see you tonight then."

"OK, see you at seven!" she said as she backed out of the driveway.

I waved goodbye until I couldn't see the car anymore. Then I turned around and stepped inside the house.


	18. Chapter 18 Dinner with the Cullen’s

**A/N: Hope you enjoy the chapter!!! Please review!!!!!**

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Ch.18 **Dinner with the Cullen's**

I walked into the house and looked at the clock by the living room. I had a couple of hours to kill so I decided to get this house looking as good as it should. I didn't have to worry about the kitchen since Alice and I had worked on getting it to its former glory yesterday. I swept the dining room and living room floors and made my way upstairs.

I remembered I had some clothes to wash so I went ahead and did just that. I also grabbed some of Charlie's dirty clothes and added them to the load. I stepped in to the guest bedroom, but it seems that Alice had read my mind or something because she had left a note telling me that she had gone ahead and cleaned the bedding as well as swept the floor in the room. I went into the bathroom and cleaned it. It wasn't that bad, Charlie had actually done a very nice job cleaning it so I just did the feminine touches here and there.

By the time I was finished with the bathroom I heard the load in the washer finish and placed it in the dryer. I went and looked at the small alarm clock in Charlie's room and I still had some time left. I decided that it would be better to be safe than sorry so I went ahead and took a shower and washed my hair. I went over to my bedroom to get dressed and to brush away all the tangles I had in my messy hair. I figured I should take care of the hair first so that's exactly what I did. When I was finished it was looking half-decent and behaving itself. Then I walked over to the closet to choose and outfit. I had the carry-on I brought with me but I also had some clothes from when I used to live in Forks, and I was glad I was the same size because everything in my suitcase was meant for the beach and not for the Forks weather.

So I glanced at my old clothes and kept looking for something decent to wear. In the corner was a dark purple dress I had bought ages ago. I think it had been for my college graduation or something. It was halter top with a nice purple cardigan than went with it. I didn't even hesitate to think twice about it and just put it on. I remember that last time Jacob had given me a small butterfly pin for the dress, now if I could just find it.

I looked everywhere I could think of, in the jewelry box, inside the closet, on top of the chest, but I couldn't find it. I started to open all the drawers in my chest to check for it when I got to the last drawer. Inside was the framed picture of Jacob and me that I had thrown in a couple of days ago. We looked so happy. Instead of feeling as sad as I always did whenever I thought of Jacob for some reason this time I remembered him and a smile formed on my face. As I reached down to grab the picture I saw that just under it was the pin I had been looking for. I grabbed it as well and placed both items on top of the dresser. I placed the frame facing the bed, that way the I could look at the picture even if I was laying down.

I took the pin and headed to the mirror so I could see where I was placing it. It was a simple brooch made of silver with little purple and blue crystals for the wings. I put on my trusty ballerina flats, grabbed my purse and headed downstairs.

I was dressed and waiting by the living room when Charlie arrived.

"Sorry I'm late" he said as he walked through the door.

"Busy day at the station?" I asked.

"Yeah. Two of the guys called in sick and that just let to a little more chaos than usual. Give me about fifteen minutes and we'll head out the door, ok?"

"Sure dad, take your time." I said.

Charlie headed upstairs to change and I went back to folding the clothes I had beside me while watching some cake decorating competition on TV. By the time I finished folding the last of the socks, dad signaled he was ready and headed out the door. I followed suit.

On our way to Port Angeles I told Charlie about my afternoon with Alice, keeping the details of the morning events and conversation about mom out.

"Before I forget" said Charlie. "I told one of the guys from the station that we would be at Bella Italia's. Just in case."

"I understand" I replied. "Hopefully nothing happens."

"Hopefully" he replied.

The rest of the drive was fairly quiet. It gave both Charlie and I a break and I even closed my eyes for a while. It was when I felt the car stop that I opened them.

"Did you have a nice nap?" asked Charlie.

"I guess" I said.

"OK, then let's go." We both got out of the car and made out way to the restaurant.

"Good evening and welcome to La Bella Italia" said the hostess.

"Good evening" said Charlie. "We're here to meet with another party."

"Name please?" asked the hostess.

"Cullen" I said.

"Right this way" said the hostess after she gave both Charlie and me a side glance. She took us to a table at the end of the restaurant. My friends were already there and talking in the familiar tone I had experienced when I was at their house.

"Bella!" exclaimed Esme as she got out of her chair and straight to me. She held me in her arms and wouldn't let go. "I'm so happy to see you darling! How are you?"

"Hi Esme" I managed to say. "I'm good. Thanks for asking. This is my dad Charlie."

Carlisle had gotten up from his chair as well and came over to greet us.

"A pleasure to meet you Charlie" said Carlisle. "I'm Carlisle and this is my beautiful wife Esme." He then followed with the introductions of his children and their partners. Alice was sitting by Jasper with a huge grin on her face and signaling me to join her. After I finished saying hi to everyone and managing to get away from Emmett's bear hug I went to take the seat by Alice but was surprised to see that my dad had already claimed it. That only left one empty seat, and that was next to Edward which I had tried to avoid until now.

I walked over to the empty seat as Edward stood up and pulled it out for me.

"Thank you" I said.

"Your welcome" Edward replied.

The waitress came by to take everyone's order. I asked for a soda and the mushroom ravioli without even taking a glance at the menu.

"I guess you've been here before" said Edward.

"Yes," I said. "The mushroom ravioli is to die for."

"Really? Then I guess I'll have the same please" he told the waitress.

I could hear everyone talking at the same time, which after being in a quiet house all afternoon was a bit noisy but it only took me a few minutes to get used to it. Charlie, Esme and Carlisle seemed to hit it off and were engrossed in deep conversation. Rosalie and Emmett kept asking Alice questions about the town of Forks as Jasper just looked intently at her. This meant that I was left to be entertained by Edward. He was quieter than usual, a bit more pensive, which was a lot to saw given the fact that he was almost always engrossed deep in thought, so I figured I should say something to liven things up.

"So what do you think of Port Angeles so far?" I asked breaking the ice.

"We haven't been able to see a lot of it, but so far it looks like a nice town." He replied. "How is Forks in comparison to Port Angeles?"

"Well, Port Angeles is Las Vegas compared to Forks. There's nothing interesting to see there really. Everyone comes here for their shopping and entertainment."

"That's interesting" Edward said. "But I'm sure that Forks has its charms too."

I nodded and started to tell him about the handful of things that were interesting about Forks when the food arrived. That smell of béchamel and mushrooms just took over my senses and I even stopped talking. Edward seemed to understand and just left me to my food which I attacked like a kid attacking Halloween candy.

The rest of the dinner was very pleasant. Rosalie kept asking me if I needed anything, which I kept assuring her that I didn't. Emmett was trying to make plans for everyone to go hiking and Charlie said that to get all the equipment they might need they had to go to Newton's. Carlisle and Esme were talking about going to Forks and seeing Sam when Jasper stood up.

"If I could have a moment" he said.

The whole table fell quiet. We all turned to see him. He looked a bit nervous, but otherwise normal.

"I've wanted to do this for the longest time" he said as he knelt beside Alice. I think I heard Rosalie squeal and Esme gasp. Alice just looked happy and expectant, as if she already knew what was going to happen. Jasper took a small box out of the inside pocket of his blazer and opened it to reveal a beautiful Asscher-cut diamond ring.

"Alice, these past years have been the best of my life" said Jasper as he took her hand. "You've been there to teach me how to love unconditionally. I'm the happiest when I'm with you and whenever we are apart it feels like part of my soul is missing. I've replayed this in my head so many times that the words are escaping me right now. So here it goes: Alice Cullen will you be my wife?"

Alice jumped on his knee and gave him a huge kiss that made me even blush and I could see had made everyone in the table blush as well. Once the happy couple managed to let go of each other everyone got up and went to congratulate them.

I was able to reach Alice after Esme and Rosalie had stepped aside to congratulate Jasper.

"I'm so happy for you Alice!" I said.

"Oh Bella! I'm so glad you and Charlie are here! Look!" she said as she showed me the ring. The ring, was three-carat Asher-cut diamond surrounded by smaller round diamonds as well as in the edges placed on platinum setting. It was simply magnificent!

"It's beautiful!" I said.

"I'm just so happy. He couldn't have done it in a better way, with everyone that I love around!"

"Congratulations Alice" said Charlie before moving over to Jasper. "And may I congratulate you as well Jasper, you are a very lucky man."

"Thanks Charlie" said Jasper.

I went over to Jasper and gave him a hug and told him how happy I was for them both. After we all managed to control our emotions and our excitement for the happy couple Carlisle asked the waitress for a bottle of champagne to celebrate.

Another waiter stepped in and asked to speak to Charlie. Charlie followed him to the side and nodded his head to whatever the waiter said to him. He made his way over to me and said: "Bella, I have to go. The station called, there was an accident and they need me."

"Ok, dad. Just give me a minute to say goodbye to everyone and I'll come with you." I said as I got up.

"I could drive Bella home if it's not an inconvenience" said Edward.

"Really Edward? That would be great!" replied Charlie. "Bella, stay and enjoy this moment with your friends. Thanks Edward."

"No problem Charlie" said Edward.

Charlie leaned in and gave me a kiss before going over and excusing himself from the party. I was a bit in shock. It just happened too fast that I didn't even have a chance to react. Charlie excused himself and after shaking hands with Carlisle and getting a hug from Alice, left.

The waitress stepped at that moment with the Champagne and the glasses and after everyone got a glass Carlisle asked for everyone's attention.

"I would like to propose a toast" Carlisle stated. "It is wonderful to be able to see my beautiful daughter so happy today. Not only are we overjoyed at having Alice accept Jasper's proposal, but also knowing that soon Jasper will become an official member of the Cullen clan is wonderful" He took a moment to clear his throat as it was obvious that he was overcome with emotions. "Love comes at us in the strangest ways sometimes, unexpectedly taking us in a journey full of wonders where simple moments are magically transformed by the touch or the smile of the one we love. I have been fortunate to have found my soul mate and experience the fullness of love, and I'm just happy to know that my daughter has done so as well. Let's raise our glasses and toast for this wonderful couple. May your days be filled with never ending love for each other. Salute!"

Everyone else joined in to say "salute" as well followed by the clasp of glass one against each other. The entire speech was very emotional and I couldn't help when tears rolled down my eyes. They weren't tears of sadness or longing, they were tears of joy for my friend. For the next hour the party mainly focused on Alice and Jasper and ideas for their future nuptials.

"We will need to go dress shopping!" said a very excited Rosalie.

"Definitely!" replied Alice. "We could all go and get bridesmaids dresses as well! We can make it a weekend trip, what do you think Bella?"

I was caught of guard and almost choked with my drink.

"Um, what?" I said. "Dress shopping for a weekend?"

"Don't give me that terrified puppy look! It's only a weekend trip I'm asking for!"

I felt so bad. Here was Alice, who had dropped everything in her life and without thinking had hopped on a plane to be with me and she was only asking me to join her for a trip to look for what could easily be the most important dress for her life and I was giving her grief for it.

"I'll be glad to come." I said.

The smiled that formed in Alice's face was enough to melt the coldest heart. I smiled back as she was pulled away from our little conversation by members of her family.

"That was really nice of you" commented Edward. "Agreeing to go on a shopping trip with Alice, even I wouldn't do that."

"She's done so much for me that this is the least I could do for her" I replied.

He simply nodded and went back to drinking the last of his champagne.

It was getting late and the yawn that escaped my lips was an indication of how desperately I needed to sleep.

"I guess I should take you home, you seem to be a bit tired" Edward commented.

"If you don't mind" I said.

He nodded and immediately got up. He stepped behind my chair to pull it out so I could get up. I nodded as a sign of gratitude and got up to say my goodbyes. Once I let go of Alice after she promised to come by Forks tomorrow, Edward and I headed outside and to the car.

He escorted me to the parking lot where he pointed towards the car that Alice had been using.

I gave him an inquisitive look to which he answered: "We're all getting our cars tomorrow. Dad rented a van in the meantime so that only left Alice's car."

He opened the passenger door for me and once he got in we headed down the 101 towards Forks…


	19. Chapter 19 Bad News

**A/N: Here's another chapter for everyone to read and review!!! Please let me know what you think.**

**Ch. 19 ****Bad news**

The drive to Forks from Port Angeles is that long of a drive, it's about an hour and a half following the speed limit, but for some reason the Cullen's have it engrained in their minds that they need to speed and make this drive only 45 minutes long.

At the beginning of the ride back to Forks I kept mostly quiet. It was a bit daunting to know that the one person who affected me was the one driving me back, but since I had started to face my demons recently instead of letting them take over like they usually did, it wasn't as bad being around him as it had been. I still caught myself a couple of times just staring at him. Thank goodness that he was focused on the road and he didn't notice. He was wearing a pair of dark-wash jeans, a light gray button down shirt underneath a dark gray blazer jacket. The entire combination made the gold in his eyes stand out. I decided that there was no point on me keeping quiet and staring at him for the entire ride.

"It was really nice of your family to come to Washington," I said. It was the first thing that popped in my head.

"Mom and dad had already decided to come before they told Emmett and me what happened," said Edward. "Once they did, I immediately knew I was coming as well."

I gave him a half- smile. It was nice to know that there were people that cared and right now I knew I would be needing all the support I could get, no matter in what shape or form it came in. I didn't know what else to say so I stayed quiet until I started humming to the song playing in the car. It was a nice song my Michael Bublé called Home. Every time I heard that song it just made me miss Charlie so badly.

"When was the last time you came to Forks?" asked Edward.

"A little more than two years ago," I said, "I just stayed in NY all this time." Something inside me just made me want to continue. "I just couldn't come back. I wasn't ready to face them," I figured he had at least gotten some details from Alice so I didn't say anything more.

"Sometimes is hard to face things, especially when it comes to family matters," Edward commented, "I hope I'm not being too personal."

"You're not," I said.

"I can't imagine what it must've been like, loosing someone so close to you. But I can see how that might make someone leave those close behind and search for some peace elsewhere."

I knew he was trying to be supportive and I was grateful so I just smiled back. I think he understood I didn't want to talk any more about the subject so he changed it completely.

"Bella, we heard that there's a pretty decent beach somewhere close to Forks, it's near a place called La Push. Have you ever been there?"

"Sure," I replied, "but it's not that great of a beach. There are rocks everywhere and you can't even swim in it. It's nice to look at and have bonfires but that's pretty much it. Compared to the beach at Sam's I wouldn't even call it a beach."

He simply laughed. And my goodness was it a magical laugh. It even sounded musical. I couldn't help it when a laugh escaped my lips as well.

"Maybe we can go there sometime in the next couple of days. I would love to see the non-beach."

"Sure," I said, "I'm sure Alice and the rest would love to see it as well."

"That… would be nice," he replied.

"Umm, Edward?" I asked.

"Yes Bella?" he said.

"Thank you."

"Your welcome," He said before continuing, "I don't want to sound ungrateful, but why are you thanking me for exactly?"

"For two things. First, for taking me home. I know it's a long drive back and for someone who's never done it before, well, you know," hesimply nodded.

"And the second thing is for trying to keep me from thinking about Billy. I sort of needed the break."

"I'm more than happy to comply,"he said, "so ,left or right?"

"What?" I said.

"Should I turn left or turn right?" he asked.

I came back to my senses and instructed him the rest of the day. Before I knew it we were parked in the drive way and I as making my way out of the car.

"Bella, can I ask for a favor?" said Edward.

"I guess," I replied.

"Could I come in for a second?" he said.

"What?" my mind was racing at 100 miles per hour. What could Edward possibly want to come in for? I knew we were on friendly terms but I don't think I was ready to take it to the next level, at least not tonight. Although kissing him was something that had even invaded my dreams a couple of nights ago. But back to the present.

"I'm sorry for not making myself clearer. It's just that the drive back to Port Angeles is a bit long and I sort of need to use the restroom if that's ok."

I sighed and that made him laugh. I replied that it was fine and even showed him where the bathroom was once we walked inside.

While I waited for Edward to come downstairs from the restroom I decided to get a pot of tea going. At least I could offer him something to drink for the trouble of driving such a long way. I was pouring the hot water in two cups when I heard the phone ring. Who could possibly be calling at such an hour?

I went to answer.

"Hello, Swan residence," I said.

"Bella! It's Rebecca!"

"Is everything ok?" I could hear the slight tremor in her voice.

"It's dad, he's getting worse. The doctors think that tonight might be it. Please come as soon as you can!" I think I spaced out as soon as she said dad. The phone fell from my hand and I just stood there.

"Bella, Bella, are you there?" could be heard from the other line.

I heard some steps coming closer and someone grabbing the phone from the floor.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Hello, who is this?" asked the other person in the line.

"My name is Edward Cullen. I'm a friend of Bella's. Is everything ok? She seems to be in shock," he said this as he placed his arm behind me and escorted me to the closest chair.

"I'm Rebecca. I was calling to ask Bella to come to the hospital as soon as possible. Do you think she'll be alright?"

"I'm sure she'll be fine. Just give her a couple of minutes. As soon as she comes around we'll head over to the hospital. Don't worry about her, she's going to be fine. We'll see you soon." Edward said before hanging up. He moved closer to where I was an knelt down so he could face me face to face.

"Bella, Bella," he said.

Somehow the sound of his voice helped me to come back to my senses. He saw this and proceeded.

"That was Rebecca on the phone. We're going to have to go the hospital soon. Are you ok to do this?" he asked as he held my hands in his.

There was true concern in his voice. I had to get a grip on myself. I didn't have the luxury for another breakdown. Right now I had to keep it together and make it to that hospital room. Rebecca, Rachel and Billy depended on me to do this and I had to come through. I nodded and assured Edward I was fine.

He made me drink some of the tea I had prepared and once he seemed sure that I was fine we headed out the door and towards the hospital to see Billy, possibly for the last time…


	20. Chapter 20 Saying Goodbye

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who has reviewing the story so far. I figured that since I'm stuck in bed for the next couple of days I should work on writing an getting you guys a couple of chapters. So here you go, it's a sad one but I personally think one of my best. Enjoy!**

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Ch.20 ****Saying Goodbye**

We reached the hospital in no time. I waited until Edward parked to go inside. I was relying too much on the support he was offering but I was too much in need of it to really care. We made it to the floor and as we walked to the waiting area the faces of Emily and Sam where the first ones to greet us.

"Oh Bella," said Emily as she wrapped her arms around me, "it was all fine and then, all of a sudden he just…"

"Please tell me he's still alive!" I yelled.

"Calm down Bella," said Sam in between tears, "he's still with us. Last thing he said was your name."

"I'm going to see him," I said as I let go of Emily's embrace and walked over to the hallway.

"Do you need me to come with you?" asked Edward.

"It's OK. I need to do this by myself. But, can you wait for me here?"

"No problem," he said.

I made my way over to Billy's room in a half walk- half run pace. I wasn't really thinking of anything when I made it to the room. Standing next to his bed were both Rebecca and Rachel with their husbands. As soon as they all heard me come in they looked over. Rachel was the first to wrap her arms around me.

"Oh Bella," said Rachel in between sobs, "we knew it would happen but…"

"Rachel, get a hold of yourself, please!" said Rebecca as she approached us, "guys, could you give us a second?" she said to her and Rachel's husband. They gladly complied and headed towards the hallway.

"We'll be in the hallway if you need us," said Paul as he stepped out of the room with Rebecca's husband in tow.

"We're so glad you made it Bella," said Rebecca as she wrapped her arms around me once Rachel let go, "all we've heard him say is your name. And then he stopped talking. The doctor said that he doesn't have much time left, but that somehow he's a bit restless. When we mentioned to him that dad had said your name, he was the one to suggest we call you over. Maybe if you talk to him he'll finally let go…" the sobbing took over her and Rachel just wrapped her arms around her sister.

The immediate shock of everything was finally wearing off so I was able to react to what Rebecca had said.

"If you could give me a couple of minutes with Billy," I said.

"Sure," said Rachel and Rebecca nodded. They moved over to Billy's bed and each whispered to his ear before giving him a kiss on the forehead.

"We'll be right outside just in case," said Rachel.

I nodded as they both stepped out. I moved closer to the bed and sat on its edge grabbing Billy's hand and placing it in between mine.

"Oh Billy," I said, "I don't think I'm ready to do this but I know I have to."

Tears were filling my eyes and rolling down my cheeks.

"I just need some way of knowing that what you said is true. If I could just speak to him one more time…" I said as I closed my eyes.

_I found myself in a meadow surrounded by flowers; a slight breeze carried the scent of freesias, lilacs and lavender. The rays of the sun filled the entire scenery. I opened my eyes and looked down to see that I was wearing a plain white sundress and my feet were bare. It felt so warm and inviting that I walked over to the center of the meadow._

"_Bella you look wonderful," I heard a voice behind me say._

_When I turned around I saw that it was Jacob standing there. He had an all white cotton ensemble and a small bouquet of wild flowers in his hand._

"_These are for you," he said as he handed me the flowers, "I've been waiting for you."_

"_I'm here," I replied._

_He moved closer and held me in his arms. The warmth that radiated from him made me feel secure and at ease. We embraced each other for what seemed like hours._

"_Bella, my Bella," Jacob whispered, "I want you to know that all I ever wanted was for you to be happy."_

"_All I've ever wanted was to make you happy as well," I replied._

_We looked into each others eyes. The deep brown pools of his eyes had always made me feel like I was looking at his soul. _

"_Bella, I need you to listen to what I'm about to say."_

"_Yes?"_

"_I've been waiting for this moment for a long time, and I'm glad it's finally come. You are ready. I want you to know that I will always love you. But it's time for you to let me go."_

"_Let you go? What do you mean let you go?" I took a small step back._

"_Bellz, I've always wanted your happiness before mine. You were everything to me. Seeing you suffer like you've been suffering has forced me to stay behind and stay close to you. But it's time. I need you to move on and let me go. What we had was great and it will never die, we will love each other forever, but I need you to be happy again, and give me the opportunity of moving on."_

"_No! I don't know how!" I yelled._

"_Bellz, darling, please listen," said Jacob as he approached me, "I know that I made you happy once, but now even the memory of me makes your heart suffer. I can't let you live like this any longer. I've become a stumbling block in your path, and I don't want to be that. I want the memory of our love to be something you look at and brings happiness to your life. I know that you have closed yourself in hopes of keeping the memory of me safe, but in doing that any new opportunities for happiness you are closing as well." _

_He took a deep breath, taking my hands into his and forcing me to look at him, "Bellz, all I ever wanted was to be with you. It's unfortunate that fate had other plans, but I don't regret any moment of our lives together. I know that you made me a better man and that everything I achieved I did because of you. But it's your turn now to be happy. You need to move on, there is a life after me, a life filled with new hopes and dreams, with people that are waiting to fill your life with joy as well as having you fill up theirs. I want you to love and be loved again, passionately and without any boundaries like you did with me. You can't let that part of you die just because I did."_

_Tears sprung out of my eyes, I felt that Jacob was being taken away from me one last time, and desperation filled my thoughts, "I can never love again. Not without you to show me how."_

_Jacob held me in his arms. I knew he was crying as well, "Bellz, my love, You always knew how to love, it's part of who you are and no one, not even I can take that away. You need to understand that your capacity to love has no limits, it's been given specially to you and you need to use it. Please!" his pleading eyes were everything I could see now, "I need to move on, Billy is waiting. But please promise me that you understand and that you will try with all that you have to be happy again. Honor what we had this way."_

_I couldn't talk, I held him closer to me, but I knew that this fight was pointless. As much as I wanted him to take me with him and Billy it wasn't something possible. I knew as well that everything Jacob had said was true. He needed me to be happy, I could see it in his eyes; he needed me to promise that I would do everything to make that happen. I didn't know how or where I got the strength to realize all of this, but I knew that by saying goodbye to Jacob at this moment and letting him move on I was opening myself up again to the possibility of happiness. All Jacob wanted was to see me happy, and I couldn't take that from him._

_I was not doing it for myself but for him when I said, "Jacob, I promise you with all my heart and soul that I will be happy. It is ok, I'll be fine. Go to Billy."_

_Jacob enforced his embrace on me, and moved to give me a kiss, so deep and pure that it washed away all my fears and sadness. He looked into my eyes and the gratitude that spilled from his told me that I had just given him immeasurable peace. He kissed both my hands before turning away from me and started to walk into the further end of the meadow._

_The meadow filled with light, and I was taken aback by the sheer splendor of it all. _

"_I will always love you Jacob," spilled out of my mouth._

"_And I you Bella," I heard him say. I was able to see Billy waiting for him with a smile of contentment on his face as they both turned back to look at me. _

"_Be happy," they said in unison. The lights surrounding them both slowly faded as I realized that now I was alone in the center of the meadow._

The sound of the monotonous beep from the heart monitor made me open my eyes. I was sitting next to Billy, who's face although pale had a smile on his lips and a look of peace.

I knew he was gone. The fact that two seconds later Rebecca and Rachel ran inside followed by the doctor and a nurse confirmed it. A slight smell of freesias and lilacs still lingered in the air. I had gotten up from where I had been sitting and moved over to the wall by the door. The doctor moved over to check the vitals on Billy as the nurse revised all the monitors. Rachel and Rebecca were holding each other as tears flowed down their cheeks.

"He's gone," said the doctor, "I'm sorry but there's nothing else we can do." He moved over to both sisters and placed his hand on top of theirs as a gesture of comfort before stepping outside the room. The nurse followed shortly.

Rachel was finally able to let go of her sister and moved over to where her dad lay. She stroked his hair and placed a kiss on his forehead.

"He looks so peaceful," she said.

"He is," I replied. This made them both look over at me.

"Thank you," said Rebecca, "we knew he was just waiting for you." She moved over to where her sister stood and placed one hand on her sister's shoulder while the other she placed on top of her father's.

"I'll give you some privacy," I said as I stepped out the door and their husbands walked in.

I walked over to the waiting area. Somehow I felt such peace. I was still very sad that Billy had finally parted, but deep down I knew I would be ok. Still, once I saw Sam's face tears formed in my eyes.

"Is he?" asked Emily as she stood up with her husband to meet me.

I just nodded.

Sam stopped dead in his tracks grasping a deep breath as his wife wrapped herself around him to give him comfort. Sobs from both of them were heard shortly after.

I felt two strong arms wrap themselves around me and hold me tight. I let my guard fall down a little as short sobs escaped my lips.

"It's ok Bella," the musical voice of Edward whispered in my ear, "we're all here for you."

I wrapped my arms around his torso and for that moment let the warmth that emanated from him give me the comfort that I needed…


	21. Chapter 21 The Funeral

**A/N: Thank you all for the wonderful reviews from last chapter. I got the first chapters of this story posted on Twilighted, which means it's been tweaked to comply with their rules. I promise, this is the last sad chapter, but it's a beautiful one! In honor of New Moon enjoy! The more reviews I get the more inspiration flows my way!**

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Ch.21

**The Funeral**

It was raining outside when I woke up. Sheets of rain cascaded down the window as the sound of running water filled the room. I got up from the bed and moved closer to see. The glass of the windowpane felt cold to the touch, but the coolness mixed with the scene of water rolling down was somehow soothing to my soul. I don't know for how long I stood in front of the window looking at the rain fall, because next thing I knew I heard a small knock on the door.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Bella, it's dad. Just wanted to know if you were awake."

"Come in dad," I said as I turned over to face the door.

Charlie snuck his face inside, a bit hesitant to walk in.

"How are you feeling today sweetheart?" he asked.

"I'm doing better dad," I replied.

"Well, the funeral is in two hours. Do you still want to go?"

"Yes, I'll be ready in about an hour and then we can go."

"Alice called, she asked if you would like them to meet you here or at the funeral home. You might want to call her back and let her know."

"I'll call her in a couple of minutes. I'll still like to go there with you, if that's OK."

Charlie simply nodded and closed the door behind him.

I wrapped my arms around my torso and turned around to keep looking at the rain. It had been three days since the hospital. I had stayed in the waiting area until Alice arrived. She and Edward convinced me to go home after sitting in the waiting room for three hours. Once home, Alice helped me change into my pajamas while Edward made us all some tea. Neither of them spoke, they stayed quiet and left me to my grief. They refused to leave until Charlie showed up an hour later. I went to sleep and woke up a day and a half later, with some recollection of what had happened.

Charlie had insisted I stayed home until the funeral, but I vehemently refused. He wanted to give me some time to process everything, scared that I would leave like I had done in the past. I was so frustrated with his actions that I called Alice and with Jasper in tow we went over to the funeral house that evening for the family viewing. I barely spoke on our way there; once we stepped in, I had enough strength to hug Sam, Rachel and Rebecca before taking a seat.

"Bella?" had asked Alice, "do you want to see him now? They're about to close the room for the evening and tomorrow is going to be more crowded."

I nodded and with her help we walked over to the open casket. Jasper had stayed behind with Sam, giving me the privacy I needed for this moment. I took a deep breath and kept my eyes closed for a while. Alice placed her arm around me giving me a short squeeze while her comforting words reassured me that everything would be fine. Her gesture gave me enough strength to open my eyes and look down.

Billy looked so peaceful. A smile formed on his lips and his semblance was at ease, as if he had finally reached home. I knew that wherever he was he was happy, and that in some small way I had been part of it. Until that moment I had dreaded seeing him, thinking somehow that everything I had experienced in the hospital had been made up in my mind as a coping mechanism. But when I saw him I knew the truth, that every single thing that had happened in that hospital room had been real and that now both Jacob and Billy were finally at peace. I couldn't help when a tear escaped my eye but I accompanied it with a smile on my face. I stroked his face and placed a chaste kiss on his forehead.

"Goodbye Billy, thank you for everything," I said in a barely audible whisper to his ear.

"Feeling better?" asked Alice as we walked away from the casket.

"Yes," I replied.

Now I was here, standing by my window, recollecting everything that had happened in the last few days. My life had changed dramatically, and in the process I had grown exponentially with the help of Billy and Jacob. They both showed me I had a life ahead of me, that I deserved to be happy and that by doing so I would honor both their memories. Although it was a sad day, for me it was also a new beginning with endless possibilities.

I made my way downstairs and dialed Alice's mobile phone, which she answered after the second ring.

"Bella?" she asked.

"Yes Alice, it's me. Dad told me you called earlier."

"Yes, we wanted to know if you wanted us to pick you up or if we should meet you at the funeral home."

"I'll meet you guys over there. If you don't mind I'll like to spend some time with dad. After yesterday, I think I need to apologize and talk to him."

"You do that Bella, he sounded a bit sad when I spoke to him earlier. I know it may not be the best time, but my family and I wanted to do something to help you guys. How about we plan something for tomorrow, do you think Charlie will come?"

"I guess, we can talk about it after the funeral, we can go and grab a bite to eat or something."

"That would be nice, mom has been wanting to see you for the longest time and I think she would really like that, to just sit with the entire family and have a nice dinner with you and your dad."

"Then it's settled. See you at the funeral home."

"See you then," said Alice before I hung up.

I was feeling better, but I knew that until I sat down and talked to dad I wouldn't be able to be completely at ease. I still needed some time to think of what I was going to say, so I grabbed some personal items and headed to the bathroom to take a shower.

After fixing my hair and donning my one and only black dress, I put on my black flats, grabbed my jacket and headed downstairs.

I could hear the TV on, which meant that Charlie would be sitting on the sofa watching it. I was not wrong, there he was, half-awake, half-asleep, with an arm over the sofa and his legs up on the coffee table.

I made my way to sit next to him; it wasn't until I rested my head next to his arm that he noticed he was no longer by himself.

"You ready?" Charlie asked as he straightened himself on the sofa.

"Not yet dad, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a bit before we headed out."

"What's on your mind Bella?" Charlie said as lines of worry formed in his face.

I grabbed his hand and placed it in between mine.

"Dad, I just want you to understand that this time is different. I'm not going to run away. I'm not going to leave you behind. I've learned that I need to keep those I care about close to me and not let them go. I'm planning on keeping you as close to me as I can. I love you and I'm sorry I hurt you so much last time."

Neither of us could control the tears that came. He moved closer and wrapped his arms around me.

"Oh, Bella," he managed to say between sobs, "I've just been so worried. I'm sorry about yesterday. I just wanted to keep you safe for a little while longer."

"Dad I understand," I replied, "I promise you, this time I'm OK. This time I won't fall apart like I did before."

He let go of me and looked me in the eyes. I tried to project through them the certainty of my words. He looked into them for a couple of minutes until he was convinced that I was telling him the truth.

"OK, I believe you," he simply stated, "I guess it's time to go then."

I nodded and grabbed my jacket as we made our way to the door.

On our way to the funeral home I told Charlie about how the Cullen's wanted to have dinner with us after the funeral, which surprisingly he agreed to. I guess he wanted the company as well. It would be a hard day for him too, he had known Billy for years, and loosing his fishing partner and friend was hard. I placed my hand on top of his which he didn't let go of until we reached the funeral home. There would be a small traditional service before we all proceeded to La Push for the burial ceremony.

Alice and Jasper were by the front door when we arrived. Alice held me in an embrace as Jasper did the same with my father. We walked inside were the rest of Billy's family as well as some friends were waiting.

I managed to get close to Paul and Rachel and speak to them briefly before the tribal leader approached the podium and asked everyone to take their seat. I moved over to where Charlie was seating and sat next to him.

"We all know that this day is a sad one," said the tribal leader, "filled with memories of a great man and father. He was a great leader and served as an example to our community. He lived a life of great honor, living each day to its fullest and remembering the traditions of our ancestors. Let's all remember Billy Black as a man that guarded his own in times of trials and always kept his head held upright. May the blessings of our ancestors be with him during the new path he has entered and may his guardian guide him through the land of the dead."

After some words from his daughters thanking everyone present we all made it to our cars and headed to La Push for the last farewell. Billy's body was to be taken to James Island, off First Beach by the tribe leaders where he was to be finally laid to rest in peace.

One we reached First Beach, everyone formed a circle around an empty canoe that had been decorated with flowers. It was a symbolic farewell; the canoe was to be taken to James Island by the tribal leaders symbolizing Billy's remains. The actual remains were to be transported later on and buried there.

Rebecca stood next to me and handed me a rose.

"We want you to say goodbye too," she said, "you're family as well."

I gave her a hug before she left to stand next to her husband.

The tribal leader took his place next to the canoe and in indigenous language sang a song of departure. I didn't understand any of the words but images of Billy flooded my mind during the song. After he was finished, he asked the family to step forward and give their last farewell.

Rachel went first; I could see the tears coming down her cheeks as inaudible words escaped her lips. She placed the white rose she had been holding in the center of the canoe before stepping aside.

Rebecca followed, a similar expression in her face. She knelt by the canoe as she placed the rose next to her sisters. She stayed there for a couple of minutes, before standing up and moving next to her sister.

They both looked towards me and nodded, letting me know it was my time to say goodbye.

I walked towards the canoe, feeling my cheeks getting wet as tears rolled down. I stood next to the canoe trying to get my thoughts in order.

"Well Billy," I said a bit hesitant, "you gave me the greatest gift anyone could had given me. You gave me Jacob. With him I learned what it was to love unconditionally and for that I thank you. I also want to thank you for teaching me about letting go, you will never understand how much those last days I spent with you meant. I only hope that you and Jacob can be each other's guardians as you start this new quest. I love you both and I will love you always."

I placed a kiss on the rose before laying it beside Rachel's and joining them.

The tribal leader said some other words, but I didn't hear anything. As the canoe was pushed towards the sea, I stood re-living that scene by the meadow, seeing the smiles on both Jacob and Billy's lips as the light surrounded them and they disappeared. I knew they were in a better place and that someday, somehow I would find my way back to true happiness as well.


	22. Chapter 22 Dinner and Seashells

**A/N: Hi! Love all the reviews I've gotten so far. Please keep them up, it keeps me motivated to keep writing. The first chapters of the story have been posted on Twilighted, if you're interested on reading an edited version. Enjoy!**

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**Ch. 22 Dinner and Seashells**

Dinner at the Lodge was considered by the locals to be a fancy affair, when in reality it was the only decent place to eat a nice meal in this town. Charlie and I arrived shortly after the Cullens did, so we were all seated at the table at the same time.

Esme had stopped me on the way in with an enormous hug. I could feel all of the concern she had for me through her warm embrace. She wanted to make sure I was OK, and even after assuring her that I was she wouldn't let go. It wasn't until Alice came and practically forced her arms away from me that she finally let go.

"Thanks," I said to Alice.

"Don't mention it, I know how mom can get sometimes," she replied.

We all sat down at the table, this time sitting between Charlie and Alice. Even though it had been an emotionally draining day, being around the Cullen's made me forget all the sadness and for a couple of hours be at ease.

Dinner was enjoyable, we had all order dessert and enjoyed it while Emmett retold a story of how after loosing a bet to Jasper, he had been forced to enter a karaoke contest where he sang Wannabe from the Spice Girls and ended up winning. I was laughing uncontrollably when Charlie asked if he could speak to me for a minute. I got up and followed him.

"Bella," he said, "I'm going to head out and stop by the station. I need to get some work done."

I knew the real reason he was leaving: he needed to process the day and all that had happened. He had never been open with his emotions, and these last few days had taken an immeasurable toll on him.

"Ok dad, I'll see you later at home," I replied, "I'm sure Alice won't mind dropping me off."

He nodded and returned to the table to say his goodbyes to the rest of the party before leaving. Esme looked a bit puzzled, but after I explained to her that Charlie jut needed some alone time she returned to normal.

We stayed in the restaurant a bit longer, even making plans to return to the beach the next day. I mentioned that it might be a good idea to invite Sam and Emily to come along and Carlisle informed me he had already thought about it and would mention it to Sam when he saw him later in the evening.

"Hey Alice," I said as we made our way outside, "do you think Jasper would mind if you guys drop me off?"

"Don't worry about it Alice," replied Edward. "I'll take her home. That is, if you don't mind Bella."

"I guess."

After saying goodbye to everyone Edward and I made our way to the car he had rented. It was actually kind of funny to see him with a PT Cruiser, since everything I had seen him driving so far had been expensive and flashy. I couldn't help it when a laugh escaped.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"Nothing, is just that I never pictured you as a PT Cruiser sort of guy."

"Ha-ha, very funny. This was all they had at the car rental. Besides, it makes me feel a little like Al Capone."

I couldn't help it when I started laughing hysterically. Imagining Edward dressed as a 20's mobster on a shoot-out was just funny.

Edward started to laugh as well. It was nice to actually feel something besides sadness and sorrow and just let go for a couple of minutes. After we both were able to contain ourselves, we got in the car and headed to my house.

"I'm glad to see you laughing Bella," said Edward out of the blue.

Immediately after he said that I started feeling a bit uncomfortable and straightened myself in the seat before nodding in response. I could tell Edward saw my reaction by the look on his face.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…"

I stopped him mid- sentence with my reply. "I understand what you meant to say, and it's ok. Really it is. It's just that I have to get used to the idea of people telling me things. I promise it's nothing personal."

"Ok," he replied.

"Well, beside the beach tomorrow, do you guys have any other plans?" I asked in the hopes that changing the conversation would get us back to being comfortable around each other.

"Em, Jaz and I were thinking of going hiking the day after tomorrow since we go back home in three days. Do you know of any good hiking spots?"

"Actually, in the outskirts of Forks there's a nice trail that goes up for a couple of miles. I'll give you guys a map with the instructions on how to get there tomorrow when I see you."

"Thanks Bella that would be great."

"Don't mention it."

We had arrived to the house and Edward parked the car on the driveway. He turned over to face me for a second.

"Bella, I wanted to give you something. Can you wait here while I go get it from the trunk?"

"OK, I guess."

"I'll be right back."

He got out of the car and I hear the trunk opening and closing in a fraction of seconds. He was back in the driver seat before I could even give the situation any thought. I was nervous, but not like before. The dread and the guilt had disappeared, I was just left with my stomach doing summersaults and my head feeling like it had been inundated by hundreds of butterflies.

"Bella," said Edward, "I found this at Sam's and thought it might be yours. I took the liberty of finishing it for you and adding a picture to it."

He handed me a white box with a sky-blue satin bow around it. I had no clue as to what he could possibly be talking about so I went ahead an opened it. There was some tissue paper covering it so I peeled it back. Inside was the white picture frame I had purchased that I wanted to glue seashells to. Edward had taken all the shells I had collected and glued them to the frame, as well as some he collected since the frame was surrounded my them. It was simply precious. And not only that, but the frame held a picture of one of the most amazing sunsets I had ever seen.

It reminded me of that day at the beach where Edward and I had watched the sun go down. I couldn't help the smile that formed. I was not only glad that he had brought this with him, but quite touched by the fact that he had gone to so much trouble to complete it.

"Thank you so much Edward. It's simply beautiful!"

"I'm glad you like it. I wanted you to remember that to every day there's a beautiful sunset that ends it. That every chapter in our lives needs an ending before another can begin."

I kept stroking the picture and the frames as small tears formed in my eyes. They weren't tears of sadness but of happiness. The words Edward had just spoken were so true in my life; I had just closed a chapter and was ready to open a new one.

"I will treasure this for years to come," I told him. "Thank you so much!"

The smile that spread in his lips just illuminated him completely. He had been there for me as a true friend. And I could see that he did it all expecting nothing in return. He was a true and genuine good soul and I was glad that he had found a way into my life.

"Edward, I want to say thank you for everything you and your family have done for me these past days, I really don't…"

"Bella," he said as he placed his hand on top of mine. That simple touch carried currents of electricity in it. "There's nothing to thank us for. We are glad to be here for you. You have become a very dear person to every one of the members of my family and I'm just happy that you are happy."

I gently moved my hand from under his before I closed the box and released my safety belt.

"Well, thank you for everything. And please thank Esme and Carlisle for dinner. I don't want to keep you longer; you have a long ride ahead of you. Have a nice night," I said as I opened the door to step out.

"Sweet dreams Bella, see you in the morning!" was Edward's reply.

He backed up the driveway as I stood there watching until the traces of the car could no longer be seen…


	23. Chapter 23 First Beach

**A/N: First of all, I want to apologize for the huge delay on this chapter. It's been crazy to say the least. In between a crazy work schedule, holidays, family and a huge case of writer's block it has taken me this long to finish this chapter. I want to thank everyone who has reviews the story so far, and all who have stood faithfully by it. I will probably have a new chapter in about two weeks, work is going to get crazier than what it already is. As always, I love the reviews and they keep me motivated to write more. So maybe if you review, I'll be able to update sooner (just maybe).**

**Ch.23 ****First Beach**

I was walking into the house with my arms full of groceries when the phone rang.

"Dad, can you please answer that? My arms are a bit full."

"Coming!" I heard him yell from somewhere in the house.

I closed the door by banging it with my foot and walked to the kitchen to drop the bags I was carrying. Since the phone was still ringing when I got my arms free, I started to walk over to the table and answer, but Charlie beat me to the punch. I went back to the task at hand, preparing the food for the beach. Alice and I had agreed earlier in the day that I would get all the food ingredients, her family would take care of the drinks and disposables. Unlike the gourmet spread her family had prepared at Sam's, I picked up hot dogs, every type of junk food imaginable to man, and all the ingredients for s'mores.

"That was Carlisle on the phone. He said they'd meet us at the beach and they're stopping to get the ice for the drinks. I'm going to go grab my fishing gear. He sounded excited when I mentioned we could try fishing."

I smiled as Charlie left the room. He had been completely somber the day before, even leaving dinner early to be by himself. He seemed happier today; the prospect of fishing giving him a reason to be more at ease.

After I finished packing the food and Charlie his fishing gear, we headed to the beach. I also packet the ingredients for the fish batter, just in case Charlie was successful in getting Sam and Carlisle to join him. I wasn't sure how I would feel once we got there, especially since the same spot had been used for Billy's last farewell. I knew that if either Jacob or Billy looked down on me, they would be glad I was enjoying a day with friends and family, instead of being under my bed mourning their loss.

I felt a change in my attitude as I stood by the canoe the day before; it was time for me to go on with my life. I had to start living and not just surviving. A new chapter had started, just like Edward had said. A new sunrise was showing in my horizon, giving my life the light that had been missing for so long.

We made it to First Beach before the rest of the group. Charlie helped me carry all the things down to the beach. I went around looking for some dried branches to use for the fire, and Charlie went back to the cruiser to grab his fishing gear.

I started to light the fire when I heard Alice's voice, "Bella! You should've waited for us to do that."

"Why? Is not like I'm going to burn the beach down or something. I'm good with matches, I promise."

"Funny," she said giving me a mocking smile. "It's just that the guys had a bet going on the way over as to who could collect the largest amount of branches for the fire."

"Well, we still need some more wood to keep it going, so they can still have their little competition if it makes them feel better."

"Did you hear that Jasper?" Alice yelled over to where he was standing. "You can still go get wood! Just promise me you guys won't get hurt."

It was actually quite hysterical seeing Jasper, Emmett and Edward take off running in search of wood, just like ants in search of food. After their little competition ended, Emmett stood next to the largest pile of dried branches while Jasper and Edward came to a really close second place.

"I want a rematch," said Edward. "How about some volleyball later on? Loser has to take all the trash to the dumpster."

"I'm staying out of this one," said Jasper.

"Game on!" replied Emmett.

"Boys, will you please go help your father with the rest of the stuff that's still in the car? The girls and I can start cooking then."

"OK mom," they all said in unison.

My fit of laughter had started with the guys running around and didn't stop until Esme spoke. I still was not used to the testosterone- induced "games" men would play to show up to each other. Even with Jacob and his friends, I always thought it had been kind of ridiculous all the stupid things they would make each other do.

I went back to the task at hand and helped Rosalie and Alice sort out the bags of food and place them in some type of order while Esme skewered the hot dogs. Emily showed up shortly after and started to help as well. With so many helping hands we were done in record time. The girls and I decided to go for a walk down the beach while Esme and Emily stayed behind to cook the hot dogs and keep an eye on the food. They didn't trust any of the boys (including their husbands) to stay away from the chips.

I saw Charlie, Carlisle and Sam heading over to the estuary to try their hands on fishing as we walked down the beach. Hopefully if they caught anything worthwhile we could cook it later on and have something else besides hot dogs to eat.

"Rosalie, I was thinking we could take the girl's trip to New York," said Alice. "Bella is already there and I've always wanted to get my wedding dress at Kleinfeld's."

"When where you thinking of going?" replied Rosalie. "I'll need at least 3 weeks advance notice so I can get things sorted at work."

"How about in two months? That should give me enough time to look through a decent amount of wedding magazines and come up with a list of dresses to try on."

"That should work," said Rosalie. "What do you think Bella?"

"I think that's a great idea, although I will be missing you every day." I couldn't help when my eyes got all watery. "But at least it will give me time to get my apartment ready for your visit."

"It's going to be so exciting!" squealed Alice. "Imagine all the shopping we'll get to do. And we can even go see a show on Broadway and do the whole Sex and the City thing!"

"What Sex and the City thing?" I asked.

"Oh you know," said Rosalie, "getting all glamorous and sexy, go to a club and drink some cosmos."

"I already have the perfect outfit in mind for Bella!" said Alice.

"Alice, now let's take it easy on poor little me. You know how you get when I'm around you and beauty products. And this trip is supposed to be all about you."

Rosalie started laughing once she caught sight of Alice's face. She looked like a three- year-old girl whose favorite doll had been taken away. Her expression could break your heart. I couldn't decide if I should give in on her whims or laugh. So I did both.

"Okay, I'll budge," I said between fits of laughter. "But that means that Sunday you will both have to do something I come up with."

"No fair!" said Rosalie. "Why do I get punished too?"

"Because you'll probably end up playing along with Alice and fix my hair or something."

"That's probably true," she admitted.

"Then it's settled," said Alice as she hugged us both. "We are going to have so much fun!"

We kept walking as we discussed our ideas of the things to do during the weekend they would visit. I told Alice that as soon as she and Rosalie decided on a date, I would call and make the appointment at the bridal store. Rosalie mentioned that it might be a good idea to look at dresses for us as well, to which we all agreed. My stomach started to growl shortly after, fact that didn't go unnoticed by either Alice or Rosalie. They decided it was time to head back and grab a bite to eat.

I was glad we made it back to the campfire when we did. Emmett had taken residence by the food and Rosalie had to sweet-talk him out of the six hotdogs he was holding.

"Mom?" asked Alice, "where's dad?"

"He's still fishing with Sam and Charlie," she replied. "I guess he's really enjoying it."

"If it's up to my dad they could be spending the whole day there," I said. "They'll probably head back soon, unless dad carried food with him." Charlie had been known to carry 'emergency jerky' to keep hunger at bay while he fished. It was very probable he would submit Carlisle and Sam to the torture of stale jerky to keep them away for a couple of more hours.

I was having a great time. I sat down on a beach blanket Emily had spread and ate my food. Emmett kept everyone entertained with his silly stories while he ate more than a dozen hotdogs. He really loved those things; he kept fighting Rosalie for more. Engrossed by the banter between those two I failed to notice when Edward moved towards me.

"Bella, do you mind if I join you?" Edward asked.

"Take a seat," I patted the blanket on my right side.

"Thanks," he replied as he sat down. "This place is really something else."

"It's nothing like what you guys have in California."

"Nonsense," he said. "Back home the beach has its benefits, but so does this one. Even if the water's too cold to swim in, the view is magnificent to say the least."

I turned my gaze to the horizon as Edward spoke. The view in front of me was breathtaking, to say the least. The slow rhythm of the waves as they brushed against the pebbles on the shore created a song to which the clouds danced with each other in the sky. Everything around me was at peace, as nature found a way to reveal its calming beauty.

I could only agree with Edward's sentiment as I replied, "It really is an amazing view."

"The sea always has a calming quality to it. No matter where on earth you are, just the sound of the waves crashing can bring you so much peace."

"It's nice to be able to sit and enjoy it," I reply. "After all that's happened, I couldn't think of a better way of spending an afternoon."

"I'm really glad you're enjoying yourself," Edward answered in a lower tone than usual.

I instinctively turned my gaze from the sea to where he was sitting. His look was pensive, lost in his own thoughts. Another one of the occurrences where a moment of silence between us was not awkward, but enjoyable. We stayed in the same position, looking at the sea and its marvels for some time, until Edward, rather unexpectedly, excused himself and left.

I was surprised to say the least at his sudden behavior, but didn't have much time to ponder on this since at the same moment Charlie, Carlisle and Sam returned from their little 'fishing expedition.'

"Bella," said Charlie, "you won't believe how many we caught! Carlisle here is a natural!" The smile in his face was able to make the cloudiest of days seem the brightest.

"Really?" I asked. "And did you guys remember to clean them or will I have to do it?"

"We cleaned them," replied Sam. "Charlie wouldn't let us leave until they were all set. There are a good number of them. Maybe later on we could get a fish fry going?" The look of expectancy on his face spoke for him. It had been a tradition in our group of family and friends to end a good day of fishing by frying the bounty. Good thing I had remembered to pack all the materials for the batter, oil and frying pan just in case.

"No problem Sam," I replied. "I have all the things we need. I'll go grab them and have Emily help me with the batter."

"Great!" said Charlie. "Did you hear that Carlisle? We're going to have some fried fish tonight!"

Charlie and Sam left the cooler with the fish by my feet while they went to where Carlisle was standing with Esme to talk about their adventure of the day. I grabbed the cooler and moved it over to where the food items were. Just then Emmett came by with a bag of ice Carlisle had asked him to grab and placed it in the cooler with the fish.

Since Rosalie was close by, I asked her to accompany me to the cruiser to get the items we would need for the fish, which she happily complied with. As we headed back down with our hands full, Rosalie and I started talking.

"I overheard Sam tell Carlisle you guys used to do this all the time."

"Yeah, it was almost a weekly thing. Billy, dad, Jacob and the rest of the gang would go out to fish and then bring back their catch. Emily and I would get the batter ready and have a cookout either here at the beach or back at Billy's."

Rosalie seemed a bit hesitant to speak, but then said, "You had great times with him."

"I really did. He had been my best friend long before anything else. We would finish each other's sentences. Call each other in the middle of the night if we had nightmares. There was this one time when I woke up thinking aliens had attacked, five minutes later Jacob was calling. He had the same nightmare. It didn't help that we had watched _Independence Day_ the same night."

"That happened to Emmett too!" said Rosalie. "He called me that night about five times. He still thinks aliens are ready to invade Earth."

We laughed the rest of the way. Esme and Emily took some of the items we were carrying and started to work on the fish. I joined them shortly after. Between the three of us- Rosalie left to look for Alice- we had everything ready in no time. As I was walking over to the edge of the water to get my hands cleaned, Emmett and Edward started to get ready for their volleyball game. I hurried back to the blanket so I could not only be a safe distance away from the flying ball but also have a good spot to watch the game.

"Come on!" yelled Emmett. "Let's get this game going!"

"OK, remember we agreed to two sets of fifteen points, I don't want you crying over to mom when you lose by a point," Edward commented. "No rematch. Loser carries ALL the trash."

"You're confusing me with what you did last week buddy," answered Emmett. "You'll be eating pebbles by the time we're done!"

"Boys!" said Esme. "Remember this is just a game. Try to keep it friendly."

They both nodded and proceeded to start the game. I was focused on staying out of the ball's path, ignoring Alice's conversation until I heard my name mentioned.

"Did you call me Alice?"

"Yes I did," Alice replied. "I've been talking to you for the past five minutes and you have been looking at I don't know what."

"Sorry," I replied. "I was trying to keep an eye on the ball. Don't want to get hit by it, you know."

"That explains it. Well, I was trying to tell you that I spoke to Jasper and he told me he's going with the boys hiking tomorrow, so that means I have the day to spend with Rosalie and you. What do you say if you meet us in Port Angeles, let's say, about nine, and then we can go to some shops?"

"I guess."

"You guess?" said Alice her expression changing from one of excitement to one filled with doubt. "What's there to guess Bella? You get to spend a day with us and then maybe we can eve meet with mom and have lunch. It will be great!"

"OK, Alice. I'll meet you in Port Angeles at nine. Maybe we can go to the bookstore for a while?" I asked hoping she would budge. If I had to spend a whole day with two shopaholics might as well go somewhere I could enjoy.

"Sure, I actually was thinking of getting mom a book I saw there. Let me go tell Rosalie." Alice got up from the blanket and headed over to where Rosalie was standing next to Esme.

Since the volleyball game was still going, and all the males were focused on the game, I moved over to where Emily was sitting.

"Hey Bella," she greeted.

"Hey Emily," I replied. "I feel like I've spoken to everyone but you today. I'm sorry for being so rude."

"Oh Bella, please," Emily said. "I know you're just trying to be a good guest to the Cullens. We'll have our chances of spending time back in New York. Actually, I was hoping to get you alone so we could chat for a bit. The past couple of days have been a bit hectic for both of us. You seem to be doing much better, I hope you don't mind me asking how are you holding up?"

"You don't have to feel bad about asking me. I'm doing well. Coming back has opened my eyes to a lot of things. And to answer your question, yes, I'm doing a lot better than I was doing before."

"I'm glad to hear it," replied Emily as relief washed over her face. "I was meaning to ask you also when are you planning on heading back?"

Until Emily mentioned it, I hadn't given much thought about when I was going back to New York. I knew I was going back, I had mental notes of things I would need once I got back and such, but left everything in a hypothetical state. I still had things I wanted and needed to do in Forks. Charlie deserved more attention, which meant at least two more days of undivided attention. I had to visit Rachel and Rebecca. But most importantly, I needed to go to Jacob's grave and see it with my own eyes. I had said goodbye already, but visiting his resting place would give me the opportunity of making it official. Emily stayed quiet during my inner dialogue.

"I guess in a week. I know Sam has things in the lab waiting…"

"Don't you worry about things in the lab. You take as much time as you need, you hear me?"

"OK," I replied. "I just have a few more things to do here in Forks and then I would be able to go back home."

"Just let us know ahead of time so we can pick you up at the airport. We leave in two days."

"No problem Emily. As soon as I have the schedule I'll forward a copy to Sam's email."

"Glad that's settled," Emily replied as a smile lit her face. "Now, let me go start with the fish. You go sit and enjoy the rest of the game."

"I can help."

Emily interrupted me mid-sentence. "Nonsense, I've done this a million of times. I can handle it by myself. Now you go and enjoy the rest of the afternoon with your friends."

I nodded and moved back to my previous spot on the blanket. The game was already on its second set. Alice told me that Edward won the first set by two points and that now he was in the lead. Emmett's face showed all his frustration with the current situation, which made it even more hysterical. He was indeed a sore loser.

I tried my hardest to divide my attention between Alice and the game, unfortunately for the boys Alice had a keen ability of grabbing all my attention, leaving me completely engrossed in her conversation. Next thing I knew the game was over. The grin on Edward's face let everyone know he was the victorious party. Rosalie rushed over to Emmett's side to console him as Alice and I got up from the blanket and headed over to Edward's side to congratulate him.

"You know that Emmett's not going to let you forget this," said Alice. "He's going to make you pay."

"For now all I care is that he'll be the one stuck on trash duty," replied Edward. The grin on his face illuminated all his features.

"OK, that's enough gloating Edward," said Esme. "Why don't you go help your father get some of the fishing gear back to Charlie's car while the girls and I go help Emily?"

Edward simply nodded and headed over to where Carlisle and dad were standing while we moved over to the bonfire to help Emily.

"Emily, what do you need us to do?" asked Esme.

"Everything's pretty much done. Maybe the girls can get the stuff for the s'mores. I'm pretty sure the guys will want something sweet after all the fried fish."

Alice and Rosalie got the marshmallows while I got the graham crackers. Esme had the chocolate in her purse, she had caught Emmett sneaking some pieces earlier in the day.

"Guys, the fish is ready!" yelled Emily.

Everyone gathered around, and with paper plates and towels in hand, got their fish and sat to eat. I sat on the same spot as before, Edward joining me as soon as he had his plate ready. It was apparent everyone was hungry, because no words were spoken until the last bits of fish had been eaten. I caught a glimpse of Charlie as he finished his plate. The look of sheer contentment on his face just made me feel happy. It had been so long since we had shared a day with friends. I was glad that we got to do it once more.

"Bella?" asked Edward.

"Yes?" I replied.

"Did you get a chance to write those directions?"

"I'm so sorry!" I placed my plate down and reached inside my back pocket. "I've been carrying this all day. I completely forgot I had this." I handed him a folded piece of paper.

"Thanks," he replied. "Is it OK if we call you in case we get lost?"

"Please," I replied. "But let me explain the instructions to you just in case."

I went on to explain in detail what I had written on the paper. I was pretty sure that the instructions were self-explanatory, but just in case, I went on to explain certain points in the directions. Once finished, Edward felt very comfortable that he could get the guys to the hiking spot.

Emmett called us over to the bonfire to get our marshmallows roasted. We both got up from our spot and headed over to join the rest of the group. Surrounded by laughter, friends and gooey goodness we enjoyed the last rays of the sun at the beach.


	24. Chapter 24 Last day with the Cullens

**A/N:**

**There should have been more than a bad case of writer's block, non-stop work and serious case of the flu to keep me from posting sooner, but there wasn't. So, moving forward, I just want to thank everyone who still believes in this story and reads it. It would be great to hear what you think of this chapter, and bring a smile on my face in the process.**

**Review= smiley face (I promise to reply to every single review I get)**

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**Ch.24 ****Last day with the Cullens**

"Bella, if you don't come out of that dressing room and let us see how the dress looks on you in the next minute, I will force open the door!" said Alice as she forcefully knocked on the dressing room door.

"I'll be out in a sec!" I replied.

I had been staring at my reflection for over five minutes. We had been visiting stores all morning, and I was exhausted to say the least. Rosalie and Alice were having the time of their lives making me try every single article of clothing they thought would look good on me. But after four hours of incessant shopping I needed a break, and hiding in the dressing room had been a good idea at the time.

"Bella, come out!" Alice's tone of voice was getting more exasperated by the minute.

I sighed and turned around to face the door. There was no point on waiting any longer. I knew that as soon as she saw the dress she would go ballistic. Even I had to admit that for some inexplicable reason the deep red color of the sundress I was wearing in contrast to my skin color made me look half-way decent. I undid the lock and turned the handle, but Alice grabbed hold of it and forced the door open.

The gasp that escaped both Alice and Rosalie's mouths was not what I had expected. I had pictured them squealing or jumping up and down in excitement, similar to their reaction to some of the things I had tried on in the last two stores we had been to. But the expression of shock that drew on their faces was quite a surprise.

"Well?" I asked. I started to focus on the tiles on the floor afraid of what their reaction might be.

"Bella…" started to say Alice but was cut short by Rosalie.

"You look amazing!"

"Really?" I asked as I looked up to meet Rosalie's expression.

"Really! That color! And the cut of the dress! It just makes you look so pretty!"

My face felt immediately warm, a tall-tale sign of the blush that was filling my cheeks.

"Oh, Bella! You definitely need to get this dress. No buts or ifs about it," said Alice.

I returned to the dressing room at once and took of the dress in question. I put my jeans and t-shirt on and met Alice and Rosalie by the counter. They were in the process of paying for their clothes when I joined them.

"I just spoke with Mom," said Alice. "She wants us to meet her at a place called Michael's."

"I know where that is," I replied as I took my bag and said thanks to the cashier. "It's not far from here so we can walk. When did she say to meet her?"

"She's already there. Dad's with Sam and Charlie. They left to go to some sporting goods store. She figured she could meet us for lunch and then join us for the afternoon."

"OK, then let's go then," commented Rosalie. "I'm starving!"

Having lunch with the Cullen women was nothing short of pleasant. We laughed, we talked, and we tried each other's meals. We even had some room left over for dessert. We ordered all of them, the crème brûlée and the bread pudding being my favorite. After Esme took care of the bill, much to Rosalie's and my objection, we headed outside.

"Well girls," said Esme. "Where to?"

"I would love to take a break from all the clothes shopping," I said in a quiet tone. "If that's OK by all of you."

"I think we had shopped to our hearts content. Don't you agree, Alice?" asked Rosalie.

"Yeah, why don't we go somewhere else? Hey Bella, how about we go to that bookstore we went to last week?"

"Now that sounds like something even I would enjoy," commented Esme. She leaned over to me as she whispered, "I know how Alice can get once she starts shopping. And I would rather spend the rest of the day with some feeling in my legs."

"Mom!" replied Alice.

"What?" asked Esme. "You have to agree that you can get a little out of control. And Rosalie, don't smile too much, because you're worse."

The walk over to the bookstore was filled with laughter. Esme had a great sense of humor, giving me an insight as to where Emmett had inherited his from. I had been enjoying myself so much with her funny stories that I surprised when we reached the bookstore.

Once we walked in, the familiar scent of worn paper and leather took hold. A feeling of pure contentment, similar to seeing an old friend after a some time apart, filled me. I felt a smile form on my face.

"So ladies, where to?" asked Esme.

"Design section."

"Automobile section."

"Fiction."

We all spoke at the same time causing all to laugh like little schoolgirls. It was apparent that even our literary tastes were completely different.

"Well, since we can't seem able to agree, I think the best thing to do is go our different ways and meet up in half an hour. Does that sound like a plan?"

We all agreed and went our different ways. I decided to focus on my favorite section in the bookstore, the classical fiction masterpieces. But as I started walking over to that area my eyes wondered over to the children's books.

It had been years since I had even read a children's book, even longer since I visited that section of the store. But browsing this little gems with unique names and drawings gave me an idea for a present. I could get something for Ben and Angela's baby boy which he could remind me by. He had seen such an adorable little person when I met him a few days ago, it seemed I could give him something that would hold a little bit of sentimental value for not only him but for Angela, Ben and myself as well.

I kept looking at the titles until I reached for a very quirky-looking edition of the _Velveteen Rabbit_. It helped me remember that one Halloween where Angela and I thought it would be great to dress as sexy bunnies but were too late to buy our costumes and ended up having to dress up as the White Rabbit from _Alice in Wonderland._ Dressing up as an overweight rabbit did not go with our plans of looking sexy, especially when we forced Jacob and Ben to dress up as well. Ben ended up as the Mad Hatter while Jacob decided to embrace his inner Queen of Hearts. We vowed never to read that book ever again, after the humiliation we endured.

I looked at my watch and saw that I still had some time left to go browse at some of my favorite books in the store. I approached the early editions and was really excited to look at the _Jane Eyre_ I had seen last time, but was extremely disappointed to see that it was no longer there. A little disappointed, I went to the cash register to pay for my purchase. The other ladies were already waiting by the front door.

"What did you get" asked Alice.

"A book for Angela's baby." I opened the bag so she could see what was inside.

"Well, if you ladies are ready, I think it's time to head out. We need to get back to the hotel and finish packing," said Esme.

We followed suit and head towards the last store we had been in to get Alice's rental car and head over to the hotel. I had agreed to meet Charlie at the hotel once he was finished with Carlisle. Alice, Rosalie and I met back with Esme in the lobby.

"Well, I'm going to head back to the room and finish with our bags," said Esme. "I hate goodbyes, so I will skip it. Bella, I _will_ see you soon. Carlisle and I are planning a trip to New York I about three weeks and we will love to get together with you."

My eyes were teary already. "I would love that Esme. Thanks for…"

"No need to thank us for anything dear. Now come here and give me a hug, and absolutely no tears."

I walked over to her embrace and was inundated with her warmth and comfort. She let go of me after a while and didn't look back as she made her way over to the elevator. Rosalie was next. She kept her farewell very short and reminded me that she would be seeing me in two months for our great Sex and the City weekend. The tears that were swelling in her eyes told me how she really felt and I couldn't help it when my throat closed up after she wrapped me in her arms. She left Alice and I without further words and almost running away.

Alice decided to wait in the lobby with me until Charlie arrived. She was very good at distracting me, and started to do so by talking about the funny cartoons in today's paper.

"I've always wanted to be Cathy."

"What could ever possess you to want to become a fictional character?"

"She has a great sense of fashion!"

I started to laugh. Alice seemed to know what to say to get me out of my moods. She started to read to me today's Cathy strip when one of the hotel clerks approached us.

"By any chance, is any of you named Bella Swan?"

"Yes, that would be me."

"There's a phone call for you miss. If you will follow me please?"

"Go ahead," said Alice. "I'll call Jasper and see if they're heading back already."

I followed the gentleman over to the reception desk and thanked him as he handed me the phone.

"Hello?"

"Bells, is dad. Sorry to surprise you like this but I tried your cell phone."

"I think I left it at the house."

"You really need to start carrying that thing with you."

"OK, dad. Are you heading over here now?"

"That's why I'm calling. I got called to the station and had to leave right away. Carlisle should be back to the hotel soon. He called one of the boys who offered to bring you back home. So I'll see you later, OK?"

"OK,dad. Take care and be careful."

"I always do. Love you Bells."

"Love you too dad."

I handed the phone back to the clerk and thanked him once more. I returned to my seat next to Alice who was finishing her conversation with Jasper.

"I guess you heard then," I told her once she hung up.

"Yeah, Jasper said they are almost here. So you won't have to wait that long."

"I don't mind waiting."

"Here's dad!"

We both got up from our seat and headed over to meet Carlisle.

"There you are!" He said when we approached him. "Charlie has been trying to get in contact with you. Was he able to?"

"Yes, he called the hotel and I was able to speak to him."

"Good, good. I already called the boys and they are almost here. Edward offered to take you home, if that's OK?"

"No problem Carlisle. It's fine."

"Well, now that the transportation issue has been taken care off. Why don't we head out to the lounge and have a drink? I sure need one."

"Dad!" said Alice.

"Dad what?" replied Carlisle. "I've been worried sick that something had happened to you girls and none of you answered your phone. I drove like a maniac to get here. And now that I know everything is fine, that you all just didn't answer because you were in your shopping daze, I would love a drink. Care to join me?"

"I would love to," I replied.

"Then follow me ladies." Carlisle pointed the way over to the bar.

We ordered our drinks and fell into a nice conversation while we waited for the boys to arrive. It didn't take long. It seemed that once Carlisle called Emmett found the perfect excuse for speeding, making it back in record time. Emmett and Jasper joined us, while Edward pulled me aside.

"Bella, I'll be right back. I just have to go to my room to get something."

"Take your time. I know how inconvenient this all must be."

"You could _never_ be an inconvenience. It will just be a minute." He gave me his crooked smile before leaving towards his room.

I was left a bit puzzled. It had been a while since his presence had an effect on me, but by what I was feeling at the moment, I could tell it was all coming back. I decided to give it some thought later and rejoin the group.

"Alice, you should have seen this place," said Emmett. "This meadow was just amazing. I bet it would be just awesome at night, with all the stars and everything. Pretty cool place for a camping trip."

"Yeah, it was pretty cool up there," interjected Jasper.

"Bella, you've been there before, haven't you?" asked Emmett.

"A couple of times."

"Have you ever been there camping, or at night?"

"Once or twice," I said. "It's pretty cool, actually. You can almost see the entire milky way."

"Oh man, we _have_ to do this trip again. We can't let it pass."

"It would be pretty cool to have Alice see it," commented Jasper as he nuzzled closer to Alice.

"And having Rose in camping gear would be an added bonus," said Emmett speaking to himself.

"I got it!" yelled Emmett startling everyone. "We can come up after Thanksgiving for the weekend and camp out."

"Emmett, it would be too cold," said Alice.

"Well, how about next month then? It will still be warm enough."

"I can get the weekend off if I let the boss know," said Jasper.

"It would be pretty cool to come back," commented Alice.

"Then it's settled!" Emmett's voice filled the lobby. "We have a date with Forks next month. This is great!"

"What's great?" asked Edward from behind me.

"We're coming back next month to go camping with the girls at the meadow we were today."

"Pretty cool," said Edward.

"Yeah," said Emmett. "And this time Rosalie and Alice won't be complaining about being bored with just the boys, they'll have Bella to entertain them."

"I don't know if I'll be able to make it," I interjected. "I'm supposed to head back to New York in a couple of days. And I'll be super busy with work."

"I'm pretty sure I can use my powers on Sam to convince him to give you a weekend off," said Alice.

I gave her a pleading look. My hesitation was not as to whether I could take the time off or not, Sam wouldn't complain, it was about spending all that money just for a weekend trip. _It would be nice to see Alice and Rose sooner than expected. I guess I can squeeze it on my Amex_. I had decided then, I would make the trip.

"I guess," I replied.

"That's great!" Alice yelled as she hoped from her chair and wrapped her arms around me. "This is just going to be great, and I'll get to see you again in a couple of weeks!"

"Alice, you're cutting off my air supply." I pleaded as I struggled with her to let me go.

"We can schedule it so that it falls on a week that Jasper has to go over there and then the two of you can fly back together. Emmett, this has been one of your greatest ideas ever!"

Alice went on and on about how wonderful this trip was going to be and in all her excitement made the present goodbye much easier than expected.

"Bella, it will be great. I will call you tomorrow to let you know we got back home safely. And then I'll call you again to see how everything's going. You better call me when you are about to go back home. Then we'll decide when to book the trip. Maybe I can use Jasper's frequent flyer miles to bump your seat."

"Alice," I interrupted her, "you're ranting."

"Oh, sorry. I'm just so excited and a bit sad. I won't get to see my best friend in almost a month." Her eyes had started to get watery.

"We will speak daily, I promise. Even if I have to stay up past my bedtime to talk to you, I will. If you start crying I won't be able to stop after."

Alice took a deep breath and used a napkin to dab her eyes with. "You're right, I'm happy, not sad. I will see you soon and talk to you tomorrow. It's going to be fine, you're going to be fine and I'm _always _fine."

"That was very humble Alice." I couldn't hold the laugh that escaped my mouth causing everyone to join in.

"OK, so I'm just going to hug you once more, ignore what you just said, and then have take me up to our room."

Alice wrapped me in her arms once again and held me in that position for a couple of minutes. She then let go of me, grabbed Jasper by the arm and started walking toward the elevator. Jasper had enough time to wave goodbye and mouth an "I'll see you later, have a nice trip," before being escorted away.

"Well, I'm going to go give Rose the good news. So Bella, I'll see you in a month," Emmett said wrapping me in his arms. "You better practice those football skills of yours because you'll need them."

He let go of me, gave me a giant smile and walked to his room.

"I guess we should head out then," said Edward.

"Good idea," I replied.

"Then follow me this way."

I nodded and walked out the hotel, knowing that I would miss every single one of the people I had just left behind.

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**I normally don't suggest stories, but I think I will start doing so. If you want to read a very funny and witty story, head over and look for Controlled Burn by staceygirl aka jackbauer. Made me laugh to the point of almost an accident.**


	25. Chapter 25 Goodbye for now

**A/N:**

**I know it's been a really long time since my last update, and to those who haven't given up on this story thank you. It means the world to me to know that there are still a couple of you out there. **

**I feel like I owe an explanation and here it goes: RL sucked for the beginning of 2010. I hated my job, got sick, depressed, etc. Then I got a new job and things started to look up. But then I moved and the work load just got first priority. So that's my explanation. Hop you all understand. RL is unpredictable at least. **

**I can at least assure everyone that there are only about 5 more chapters in this story. So please don't give up!**

**Again, thank you for you patience and I hope you enjoy!**

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**Ch.25 ****Goodbye for now**

"You seem quieter than usual. Are you OK?"

We had been riding in the car for almost fifteen minutes. I was lost in thought of the wonderful friends I had left back in the hotel, and how much I was going to miss them.

"Bella?"

Edward's voice brought me back to the present and out of my brooding mood.

"I guess I'll be fine. I'm just going to miss everyone, especially Alice."

"You'll see all of us sooner than you think."

"I've just grown used to the fact of having you all around this past couple of weeks. Seeing that I'm going to be all the way across the country is damping my spirits."

I was looking out the window while Edward and I spoke. I was trying to avoid looking at him as I confessed how much I was going to miss his family. I felt his hand on my shoulder, a sign that he was trying to comfort me, but the tingle of electricity that came out of his touch startled me. He seemed to have felt something as well, because he immediately removed his hand. I kept staring out the window as the car filled with our silence.

"Well, I'm pretty sure that if Alice has her way, you two will be on the phone and Skype constantly. And mom and dad are supposed to go to New York in a two of weeks so you'll get to see them then. Before you know it, you'll be back in Forks and ready for our camping trip."

The thought of having Alice on the phone and video chat on a daily basis made me smile. I looked over at Edward, who was looking at me out of the corner of his eye, and gave him a smile as well.

"Would you like to listen to some music?"

"Sure," I replied.

"Feel free to choose then," he said as he handed over his iPod. I started looking through his playlists. He was very methodical on his music choices and the titles of his Playlists. He had everything from Tchaikovsky, Beethoven and Vivaldi to The Killers, Classic Rock and Contemporary Beats. I kept scrolling through the lists as I passed one titled Reminds me of Her and another one called Sweet Dreams. I was curious as to what music he had on those playlists but decided to hit Play to the one I found after those, simply called Have Some Fun.

I was not expecting Cyndi Lauper singing _Girls Just Wanna Have Fun_, but that's exactly what I got. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips as I tried to understand why this song was even in Edward's radar.

"I didn't picture you as a fan of Cyndi Lauper," I said in between fits of laughter.

"Emmett!" replied Edward. "I knew he was up to something when he asked if he could borrow my Ipod."

We both kept laughing as the song reached its chorus.

"I don't want to even think what's next," said Edward. "Knowing Emmett and his love for everything silly, Weird Al will be in there somehow."

"If you want I'll just change it," I replied.

"No, it's fine. If you want to listen to it we will."

"It's OK, Edward. I'd rather listen to something else to tell you the truth."

He nodded as I changed the Playlist to the one titled Sweet Dreams. Michael Bubblé's Dream a Little Dream of Me started playing.

"That's more like it," I said as the sweet melody filled the car.

"Didn't picture you as a Bubblé fan," replied Edward.

"I have my moments," I said as I adjusted myself to be able to face him better. "Sometimes all I listen to is Bubblé and Sinatra, but other times I want to listen to Muse non-stop."

"Now Muse I did picture you as being a fan of," Edward commented. "You know they're going to be in New York in two weeks?"

"Really? I would love to see them in concert," I said.

"Well you never know, you might still be able to get a ticket," said Edward.

"I'll have to check it out, but I doubt I'll be able to afford it. I have to save some money for my trips back here. I want to come back for Christmas, too."

Edward looked at me for a couple of seconds before changing the subject. We started talking about other bands we liked, and other music genres we listened to as well. I found out that our taste in music were pretty similar, although he was the music genius and I was lacking by leaps and bounds in that department. Edward listened to any music, no matter the language it was in. He would search for the lyrics of the songs he liked and translate them when necessary.

"It's the emotion the artist portraits when they're singing what attracts me to the song. If I can sense they are completely vested in it, I'll be addicted to it for months. I even started learning Spanish and French in school just so I could understand the songs better. And don't get me started about my Thai phase."

Conversation kept flowing between us soon after. We were approaching the outskirts of Forks.

"Bella, are you hungry?"

"Just a little," I lied. My stomach sensed my betrayal and decided to growl at that moment.

"A little, ha?" Edward chuckled as I tried to hide the blush I felt spread through my face. "Well I'm starving. How about we stop at the Drive-In and get something to eat?"

"Sound good to me," I said.

"Then to the Drive-In it is."

It took us a minute to get to Sully's and park. We both got out of the car, although Edward had run to my side to get the door open for me. We walked in and headed to the counter to place out orders.

"Good evening, what would you like today?" asked the cashier.

Edward looked at me waiting for me to place my order. "I'll have a cheeseburger, no ketchup, no mayo, and a Sprite please."

"Is it for here or to go?" asked the cashier.

"For here," I replied.

"OK," she replied. "And what are you having today?" The cashier turned towards Edward and a smile plagued her face.

"I'll have a cheeseburger with everything, an order of large fries and a Coke. Thank you," said Edward turning on his charm.

The cashier completely forgot I was even there when she replied, "It will be twelve dollars and sixty two cents."

I went to grab my wallet but Edward stopped me. "My treat," he said. "You'll get the next one, OK?" he grabbed some bills out of his wallet and handed them to the cashier.

"Keep the change," he told her.

She gladly smiled back to him and replied, "I'll bring you your order as soon as it's finished."

I rolled my eyes, knowing for a fact that they never brought your orders to the table. I kept walking towards the dining area and found a small table where we could sit.

Shortly after Edward followed and took the seat on the opposite side. "The people in this town are so nice," he commented.

"You have no idea," I replied sarcastically.

"I bet growing up here was pretty amazing," he said.

"It was decent," I said. "I always tried to keep myself occupied, I read a lot and Dad took me to La Push every weekend to play with Jacob and his sisters. But I think it would have been better if I had a sibling. I would've had someone to keep me company, you know?"

"You'd be surprised," he said. "Don't get me wrong, I love Emmett and Alice, but sometimes I wish I was an only child. Being the middle kid is not that great."

The food was brought up to us as the cashier promised, and the smile that Edward gave her in gratitude probably made the cashier's day.

"I think you made her day," I said. "She can't stop smiling."

He laughed in response. "Well, I'm glad. She seemed like she needed it. But enough about the cashier, let's dig in."

He handed me my drink and burger and placed the French fries in the middle.

"I didn't order any fries," I said, realizing I had forgotten to get some.

"No worries, I got them large so we could share."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it," Edward replied as his crooked smile formed.

I had to snap out of the small trance he had put me in and decided to concentrate on the task at hand and ate my burger.

After a couple of mouthfuls were we both felt silent, I decided to pick back up the conversation, "You were saying something about being a middle brother?"

"Yeah," Edward answered. "It has its ups and downs. I like the fact that Alice seems to think Emmett and I can do no wrong, but sometimes it's just too much pressure. Then again, it's nothing compared to what Emmett had to endure being the oldest."

"I can't imagine," I said. "It must be hard for him with all the expectations and all. Jacob would tell me about how his dad will always expect good grades from his sisters, but when it came around to him, he could slack off without much trouble."

"That seems to happen sometimes with the older sibling. Like when Emmett went to High School and Alice and I were still in middle school. I still had to work hard, but Mom and Dad were so focused with Emmett and his football that it took the pressure out of us two for a while. But that changed once I got to High School. They all expected me to follow in Emmett's footsteps and join the football team. He was the quarterback. But it wasn't really my thing. I do like playing every now and again, but not as much as Emmet does. So when I didn't join the team, Emmett and the rest of the family were a little disappointed."

"Sounds tough," I replied.

"Not great, but not bad either. I kept to my music and after a while everyone just let me be. Emmett understood that the spotlight wasn't really my thing and Mom and Dad were just happy to have me at home on Friday nights."

I gave him a look that I hoped showed some understanding from my part and then went back to eating. Soon we were both finished with our meal. I excused myself to go to the bathroom. When I got back, Edward was already outside by the car.

"Thanks again for dinner," I said as I approached his side.

"No problem," he replied. "Want to walk around for a bit? I want to stretch out the legs before driving again."

"Sure, I can show you around a bit. See all the landmarks and stuff. They're all in one street."

He laughed and we started to walk down the street. He thought I was kidding about the landmarks, but I wasn't. I showed him all the places of interest, the pharmacy, the one and only stop light, and the Mexican restaurant. We kept on with the conversation as we walked on. In no time we made it to Forks Outfitters and decided to head back.

"I guess we should take you home," said Edward. "I have quite a drive back." Just as he was finishing his sentence a yawn escaped his lips.

"You should drink some coffee before heading out though," I said. "I can make you a cup at home."

"Coffee sounds really nice right about now. Thanks, Bella."

"Don't mention it."

We got in the car and in a matter of minutes Edward was parking in front of my house. Charlie's cruiser was missing, which meant that he was still at the station. I lead the way to the house and opened the door.

"Welcome to the Swan residence," I said as I opened the door.

Edward just smiled as he followed me into the house. After dropping my things down by the couch I headed towards the kitchen with Edward quietly following.

"It will take just a couple of minutes for the pot to brew. Do you want milk and sugar with it?" I asked while I set the coffee maker.

"Black is just fine," he replied.

"OK, then." I motioned for him to take a seat by the dining table and went to join him on the opposite side.

"Thanks again for driving me back home," I said.

"It was my pleasure, Bella," he replied.

Before silence filled the space between us I spoke.

"Edward, I've been meaning to ask you something."

"Ask away then."

"Well, I know that Alice is in FIDM studying Fashion Design, but what about you and Emmett?"

"Emmett went to UCLA to play Football and study business. But after an injury decided to change his major. Right now he's finishing up his Fellowship in Sports Medicine."

"Somehow Emmett's career fits him to the T," I said.

"Yeah, Dad was really happy to have him as the next doctor in the family."

"How about you?"

"I always loved music, but never really pictured myself doing it as a living. I got two a Bachelors degree with two majors instead, one in Music Composition and another one in Biochemistry."

"Wow! Two majors, are you kidding me?"

Edward laughed at my response. "I know, I'm a little bit of an over-achiever, I guess. I just couldn't decide on just one."

"So what did you do next?"

"I'm just finishing up my PhD in Biochemistry. I just have to present my dissertation and I'll be done. I have a few options on Post-Docs that I'm considering."

"Is there anything you can't do?" I was impressed to say the least.

"I can't cook anything to save my life," he replied.

We both laughed at that. The Coffee Maker's timer went off and I got up to prepare Edward's cup. Once finished, I handed him the cup and sat back down.

"I wish I could've gotten my Masters," I confessed.

"What's stopping you?"

"I don't really know. I had my life planned out and then everything happened. I guess I'm just a little scared of applying and not getting in."

"You'll never know if you don't try," said Edward. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Sam would be more than willing to ask if you can audit a graduate class. That way you get a feel of what it would be like."

"That's a great idea! Thanks."

"Don't mention it," he replied. I was processing his suggestion as he finished his coffee.

"Thanks again for the coffee. I really needed it."

"It's the least I could do."

Edward looked at his watch and got up from the chair.

"I better get going. I have a long drive back and the flight home leaves first thing in the morning."

"Let me walk you out," I replied.

I followed him to the ent5rance and held the door opened for him as he stepped out.

"Thanks again for everything," I said. I could feel a slight blush forming. Even after spending a couple of hours getting to know him, his looks were still affecting my senses.

"I was more than honored. Thanks for the coffee."

A moment of awkwardness passed between us. I didn't know how to say goodbye. I blurted out the first thing that came to my mind.

"Well I guess I'll see you in a month," I said while looking at my feet.

"Bella?" Edward asked as he stepped closer.

"Yes?" I said as I looked up.

"I… have something for you. Let me go get it, OK?"

I nodded. I couldn't trust my vocal chords to work correctly when he was so close. Edward seemed to hesitate for a moment before he stepped away. He walked over to the car and got something out of the trunk.

"I saw this and it reminded me of you. Could you wait until I leave to open it?" Edward asked as he handed me a package wrapped in brown paper. It seemed a little heavy.

"OK."

"Bella, I… can't wait to see you in a month," he finally said.

I felt the tears forming in my eyes so I kept my eyes down looking at the package in my hands.

"It's been wonderful getting to know you and... becoming your friend. Please take care of yourself. I'll make sure Alice calls you as soon as we land. Meeting you has been a blessing."

I could feel him stepping closer as I stood frozen in the entrance. My eyes closed as I felt his breath brush my head and shortly after his lips reached down. The simple kiss on the top of my head sent waves of electricity down every fiber of my body.

"Goodbye for now sweet Bella," Edward whispered before stepping away.

I didn't know how to respond. I had my eyes closed as my body still tingled with electric currents. The sound of the car's engine brought me out of my state of shock. I couldn't see him because of the headlights but I still lifted my hand and waved at him as his car disappeared down the street.

After a couple of minutes passed I went back inside and up the stairs. I could take care of the lonesome cup in the morning.

I was out of breath by the time I sat on my bed. I tore the paper from the package. Inside was a simple white box. I got it opened as quickly as I my nerves allowed. Inside the box was the copy of _Jane Eyre_ that I had been admiring at the bookstore in Port Angeles a few days back. As I opened it a small envelope fell in my lap. My name was in the front of the envelope in the most beautiful cursive handwriting I had seen. I gently placed the book on the bed and reached for the envelope. There was a letter inside which I immediately started to read.

_Bella,_

_I didn't know how to say this in person so instead I wrote it down. I was just passing by when I saw the bookstore in Port Angeles and decided to go in. Once I saw this book it reminded me of you. In a lot of ways you are like Jane, you have her strength and resiliency. You are devoted to those you love no matter what just like she was. _

_I wanted you to have this book so every time you read its pages, it reminds you of your own strength and beauty in the midst of tragedy. I've learned so much from you these past few days. I feel honored to call you a friend and only wish to know you even more as time passes._

_I've never met anyone like you. You are a rare gem._

_Meeting you has changed my entire family and for that I thank you. It's been a privilege to have you in our lives._

_Your friend,_

_Edward_

I couldn't help the tears that rolled down my cheeks. They were tears of joy. I was so moved by his gesture. Edward's actions caught me by surprise. The utter joy I felt didn't dissipate as I got ready for bed. The smile on my face didn't leave as I gave myself over to the land of dreams.

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